What do I mean by better balance and this season? It’s the holiday season that I’m referencing, a busy, chaotic, party and shopping-heavy time of year. By better balance, think about aiming for a balance that’s right for you, good enough, and factors in the shift that happens as festivities ramp up and the year draws to a close. I encourage you to let go of perfection as an idea or pursuit. It’s not necessary and will only add to your stress and unhappiness. Instead, what ways can you create a reasonable balance that incorporates what’s most important to you and limits the “should” or “have-to” elements?

3 Ways to Find a Better Balance . . .

FOMO and JOMO

Let’s start with the simple “yes” and “no.” There will be invitations to parties and gatherings. There will be requests to engage in a variety of personal and professional activities. There will be things we might not want to do but will feel obligated or responsible for doing. Just remember that you always have a choice. That decision is either a yes or a no. Remember that you don’t have to say “yes” to everything unless that’s what works for you. Two acronyms come to mind: FOMO and JOMO. The first, FOMO is the fear of missing out. We sometimes say yes to something just because we don’t want to be the only ones not present. But that yes might not always serve us. The second phrase is JOMO, the joy of missing out. This encourages you to honor yourself and recognize that not doing is sometimes the option that is most beneficial. In some instances, saying “no” brings you closer to being more balanced.

GOOD STUFF

Engaging in what truly brings you joy is a way of tipping your balance in a positive direction. Make sure to include as much of the “good stuff” this time of year. It might mean spending extended time with loved ones, cooking special holiday meals, throwing a gathering for friends, relaxing at home with a good book and a cozy blanket, or taking a long walk in the snow. There were so many parts of the Thanksgiving holiday that I enjoyed. Having my family around was beautiful. My heart is still full just thinking about their visit. Baking cookies together were at the top of the list of balance-inducing, joy-filled activities. Baking was something we did a lot of when our daughters were young and don't do as often now that they’re grown. Cassie, our youngest daughter, wanted to make Moravian Christmas cookies together, a recipe we baked many times when she was little (see video at end of post.) It was so much fun to cook with Cass, her boyfriend, and my husband. Measuring ingredients, stirring the mixture, rolling the dough, and cutting out shapes with the cookie cutters involved a present moment focus and mindfulness that enhanced our time together.

SQUARE ONE

Better balance also comes in the form of returning to square one and revisiting the basics. Especially this time of year, a bit of tweaking can go a long way to preparing you and your home for the holidays. While you might not have the time or energy now to take on a huge organizing project, think about the smaller ones that will create better balance. How about doing a quick edit of your clothing closet or drawers? Instead of that bursting at the seams feeling, you can create some breathing room for your clothes and self. Instead of decluttering all surfaces, pick one place in a central area that when clear, will help you move through your day more efficiently and make holiday entertaining less stressful. Then there are the other types of basics like having some additional pantry (beverages, crackers, pasta, cookies, nuts, cheese, dried fruit, paper goods) items on hand for last minute entertaining and guests. There are some self-basics like getting enough sleep, exercise, and hydration. Since we’re prone to indulging during the holidays, returning to these basics is essential. One of my go-to-balance-bringing-basics is meditating daily. Routinely practicing mindfulness meditation is especially helpful during this season to create groundedness, calm, and balance.

What helps with a better balance? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation!

Baking together . . .