When you are stuck, how do you figure out the next step? I asked several of my wonderful colleagues (Geralin Thomas, Andrea Sharb, Tracey Foulkes, April Lane Benson, Sue West, Val Sgro, Yota Schneider) to think about this question and share their personal strategies with us. Their fabulous responses are filled with honesty, humor, and creativity. My gratitude goes to each of them for taking the time to reflect, and give us their insightful, encouraging words of wisdom. If you are feeling stuck, perhaps one of these ideas will work for you.

When you are stuck, how do you figure out the next step? . . .

1. Help Another

“When stuck I intentionally and purposefully find someone who needs help and then I help them. Helping someone who needs or wants assistance forces me to think about something other than whatever current challenge I'm dealing with. I've learned that being isolated rarely helps me figure out my next steps and while it's much easier to stay home alone, I've found that being helpful is the antidote to being stuck.”

Geralin Thomas, CPO-CD, Professional Organizer & Organizing Instructor

2. Coach Self

“When I’m stuck, I coach myself, like I’d coach a client. I get curious about my roadblock and what can get me going again. Questions like:  What is really getting in the way of me moving forward? What do I want from the project? What makes the project important to me?  What has worked for me in the past in similar situations? These questions will generally get me beyond stuck.

Andrea Sharb, CPO-CD, ACC, COC, CPO, Professional Organizer & Coach

3. Call Accountability Buddy

“I freak out, and then procrastinate. Get annoyed at myself for procrastinating and start asking why I'm freaking out. It's usually from overwhelm, taking on too much, or being shoved in a direction outside my comfort zone. I then call on an accountability buddy (I have a few), and unpack what I am thinking and feeling. Breathe, then break into my favourite mantra 'absolutely no excuses' - pick myself up and step forward. Success is in the doing, so I might as well just get it done."

Tracey Foulkes, Productivity Specialist 

4. Pause First

“When I'm stuck, the first thing I do is take a pause to clear my head. I might meditate and then go outside (no matter what the weather) and do some kind of physical exercise. Then I'm likely to start making notes or talk to a friend about my stuckness, try to pull it apart, and look closely at just one piece of it. Finally, I carefully set a realistic, measurable goal related to that one piece which continues to melt some of the glue!”

April Lane Benson, Ph.D., Psychologist & Author 

5. Activate Strengths

“I use several strategies, mostly taking advantage of my natural verbal processing. These also compensate for not being able to order steps as well in my head as outside my head. I use a written set of decision-making criteria to filter business ideas through. I talk through the problem aloud to myself, to a colleague or my business coach. I write about where I am stuck. I’ll map out the steps to a process so I can see a logical next step. I’ll research to access my intuition or sometimes to gain confidence. I’ll use strategies from a similar situation simply to gain momentum.” 

Sue West, CPO-CD, COC, CPO, Professional Organizer, Coach, & Author

6. Research, Sleep, or Chew

“It all depends what I'm stuck on. If it requires an answer I can research, I go to the Internet; if I need basic knowledge, I use the children's section of the public library. If it requires judgment, I seek the advice of trusted colleagues, and then I sleep on it. If I'm stuck writing a passage in one of my novels, I pace around, talk to myself, and literally chew on something; somehow the chewing motion unleashes the creative part of my brain.”

Val Sgro, Professional Organizer & Author

7. Be Patient and Open

“Life experience does come in handy. It helps me to remember that I’ve been there, done that before and I came out all right. This knowledge strengthens my resolve and confidence in the fact that, eventually, it will all work out! Invariably though, I have to surrender to the process and allow the answers to come to me, at their proper time! I have to be willing to stay open to the experience of being stuck! This is the greatest challenge . . . doing what’s in front of me while waiting for the fog to lift - when time and circumstance are ripe for me to act!” 

Yota Schneider, Life Transitions Coach

Which strategies resonate with you? While I appreciate and use many of these strategies, the one I focused on this past year was Yota’s. Today marks the one year anniversary of my Dad’s passing. I had to be patient and wait for the “fog to lift” before figuring out next. Sometimes we’re able to force ourselves forward and other times we need that waiting space as we travel through a transition. I’d love to hear from you. Come join the conversation and share your thoughts about being stuck, favorite strategies, or next steps.

Tonight there was no question that my next step was to write this post. I’m long overdue and I could delay no more. That’s how it goes. Sometimes our next step is so clear that there is no debating, procrastinating, or confusion. On the other hand, sometimes that next step isn’t obvious.

Finding the next step has to do with locating where you are. The where I’m referring to is not a specific physical location but your state of mind. Once you know where you are, clarity about “next” can more easily be seen.

In my computer and work area are many small, colorful toys. In addition to this fun collection, I also have a variety of phrases on signs and notes. Recently, I realized that these words help me locate where I am and prompt me towards next. I’d like to share them with you.

6 Next Step Prompts

“Things to do”  - This small metal sign reminds me that next often involves looking at my list. Do I know what’s most important? Have my priorities shifted? Have I been realistic in what can be accomplished on that day? This sign keeps me focused, especially when I’m not sure what to do next.

“Let’s leave worry as a last resort.” – This quote written on an index card is something my Uncle Lew says. Worry is unproductive. When worry starts to creep into my thoughts, this note cues me to shift my focus to something useful.

“I write to understand as much as to be understood.” – This Elie Wiesel quote is printed on a piece of paper. It suggests that sometimes next involves pausing to write and reflect. From this understanding and discovery of where I am, the next step appears.

“There is no end to what we say is getting ready.” – This quote handwritten on a purple sticky note is something my mom said. It means that while preparation is important, we need to recognize when we’ve done enough. Let go of fear and perfection. Take that next step, even if you’re not 100% ready or sure.

“I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.” – This quote by Anna Quindlen stands upright on a small card. It encourages me to appreciate now, next and everything along the way.

“Relax” – These cutout metal letters remind me that I can’t work 24/7. A balanced life means that rest, sleep and not doing are essential. That word says to me, “Linda, it’s time to unwind. It’s time to stop.”

I’d love to hear from you. Come join in the conversation. What helps you find next?

Photo by Allison Samuels

Taking that next step, trying something new and moving forward without certainty can be scary. Fear blocks our thinking. When we walk down the fear path, making excuses and creating reasons not to take action can consume our thoughts. These negative thoughts can overwhelm us to the point of inaction.

What if you allowed yourself to acknowledge your fear? It’s a normal part of our human experience. What if you then embraced the joy in pushing ahead despite your fear? What would be possible for you?

We have the opportunity to alter our perspective. Instead of thinking about all the reasons why we might fail, we can choose to focus on experiencing a positive outcome.

The next time you are avoiding organizing the junk drawer, sorting through a pile of desk papers or reclaiming the kitchen table, think about the joy and satisfaction in both the process of moving ahead and the result of your efforts to do so.

I recently completed a seven-week coaching skills course for organizers. The learning was fabulous and challenging. Right from the start, we were asked to step outside our comfort zone and practice our coaching skills. I worried about not doing it right. I worried about it being awkward. Since the point was to learn, I knew I had to work through my fears. I learned as much from what went well as from what didn’t. I loved learning these new skills.

How will joy fit into your next step?

This morning came with a great reminder. Like most mornings, I woke to the sound of my alarm telling me it was time to start my day. It was dark, gray and rainy. The pouring rain was making soothing percussive sounds on our roof. The bed felt particularly warm and cozy. I remembered that since my first appointment wasn’t so early I had the option to sleep just a little bit longer. So I did.

These extra minutes of sleep and enjoyment of hearing the rain made me reflect that sometimes it’s important to allow our next step to be getting back to basics like sleeping, eating healthfully, exercising, breathing deeply or being grateful. Our busy schedules and long to do lists can easily overwhelm us. Being overwhelmed often translates into inaction. It seems like there is so much to do, we feel defeated before we begin. We then do nothing, creating a more intense state of overwhelm. How do we break this unhealthy cycle?

This is where those basics come in. There will always be a next “something” to do. That’s life. When however, it feels like too much, perhaps your best next step is one that involves taking care of you. It will give you the energy and mental clarity to move forward. So whether it's five more minutes of sleep, eating a good breakfast, getting a massage or taking a long walk, find something that will renew you.

I’d love to hear what you’re thinking about. Are you in need of some self-care? What will you do next to take care of yourself?