Do you feel more stressed during the holiday season? What is the source? Holiday-related stress might revolve around travel planning, gift-giving, card-writing, decorating, over-committing, or entertaining.

As someone who enjoys and has hosted many gatherings, I continually work on reducing stress. Experience helps. The more I do something, the easier and less stressful it becomes, and the better I am at planning and navigating surprises. However, a more significant aspect is mindset. If I keep telling myself how stressed I am, what happens? I reinforce that feeling.

What is Scruffy Hospitality?

Recently, I heard about “scruffy hospitality,” which is a more relaxed approach to entertaining. It’s a practice and also a mindset. The idea is to prioritize connection and conversation over obsession with creating picture-perfect environments and Instagram-worthy meals. The concept includes having people over without cleaning up first and approaching food more simply. Instead of making elaborate dishes, ‘scruffy’ entertaining loves potlucks, leftovers, and takeout.

While “scruffy hospitality” was coined a decade ago by Jack King, an Anglican priest from Tennessee, it has received more attention in the last few years. It rejects unrealistic social media standards that create pressure on us to be “perfect hosts.” Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity. These involve letting go.

For this holiday season, especially if you’re stressed, I encourage you to incorporate some ‘scruffy’ into your life. It will look different for each person. Consider how beneficial scruffy hospitality could be for reducing your stress.

As a seasoned host, ‘scruffy’ isn’t a term I naturally associate with entertaining. I like to clean and prepare. Don’t get me started on my to-do lists. I enjoy the visual aspect of decorating the tables, arranging flowers, and creating colorfully plated dishes. Those aspects aren’t stressful for me. However, those and other aspects of entertaining might be stressful for you. And if it is, some of the suggestions below can help.

11 Ways to Reduce Holiday Stress by Embracing Scruffy Hospitality

• Reframe Clean – Do a quick clean instead of a deep one. Or hire someone else to clean.
  

• Organize Less – Declutter the dining room only, leaving all other areas in their ‘as is’ state.

• Recruit Help – Ask guests to bring parts of the meal.

• Minimize Decor – There is no need to go wild. A single plant, a small vase of flowers, a bowl of fruit, or an arrangement of gourds is a minimalist way to decorate a table. You can also leave things bare.

• Be Present – Cook with your guests instead of preparing things in advance.
  

• Try Self-Serve – Set up your food buffet-style rather than as a plated, sit-down meal.

• Don’t Cook – Forget about cooking anything. Purchase the entire meal or a few dishes.
  

• Do Less - Simplify your menu with fewer choices or prepare dishes requiring minimal ingredients.
  

• Dress Down – Be comfortable and show up as you are. No fancy clothes are required.
  

• Reduce Scope – Fewer guests can make the gathering more manageable. Dial down your invite list to reflect your ideal number of guests.

• Simplify Gift Giving – Focus on clutter-less gifts for you and the recipients. Give meaningful time-centered gifts like movie tickets, museum passes, or personal care services.

“Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

How I’m Incorporating Scruffy Hospitality This Season

One thing I decided to do differently this year is not to bake the apple and pumpkin pies. Instead, our daughter generously offered to make pies. While I’ve always baked, removing the pie-baking task frees up some time and reduces stress around coordinating kitchen usage with my husband. We share cooking for Thanksgiving and work around each other’s schedules and tasks. No pie baking this year means I’ll eliminate the stress of negotiating for counter, oven, and refrigerator space.

The other area where ‘scruffy’ applies is the number of guests. We love having a houseful of family and friends for the holidays. However, some guests have health issues or scheduling conflicts this year. While we’ll miss them greatly on Thanksgiving, fewer guests give me more time to talk with people. Managing the flow of the space is less stressful with fewer people, too.

Human-Considered Holidays

The holidays don’t have to be stressful. There are many ways to increase joy and minimize stress. How can you relax your approach to holiday hospitality? What will help you make it more joy-filled and less stressful? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help decluttering, organizing, brainstorming, or planning? Do you need an accountability partner? I’m here for you. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward - A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling the fast whoosh of time passing with the holiday season arriving, the elections looming, and the year ending? It’s a lot to take in. You may feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you’re thinking about what goals you wanted to accomplish this year, the time left to do it, and what is actually possible.

Maybe your thoughts are occupied with ‘regular’ life maintenance to-dos plus hundreds of holiday-related tasks, including gift shopping, holiday meal prepping, guestroom readying, travel planning, and family and friends’ gatherings.

Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.

I often say that life is in the joyful doing and presence of the moment. And while that’s all well and good, when you’re stressed and overwhelmed, accessing that presence can be more challenging.

With so much going on with work and family, externally and internally, this time of year, making tiny adjustments is helpful. Infusing compassion and mindfulness into your thoughts and actions will encourage a more joyful, fulfilling, and happier holiday season.

I offer you a thought, question, and strategy to help.

3 Ways to Prepare for a Compassionate Holiday Season

1. One Thought: “We don’t have to be perfect.”

Let’s remove the idea of perfection from the holiday season. Why impose more pressure, stress, or unrealistic expectations on yourself or others?

Try channeling your perfectionism energy differently. Focus your energy on one of these options instead:

• Excellence

• Personal best

• Good enough

• Progress

• Ease

• Done

As the Noom app said about overcoming thought distortions, “…it’s about recognizing that we don’t have to be perfect. We’re human.”

Which reframe of perfectionism (one suggested or something else) is helpful for you?

“Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. One Question: “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

One of my favorite recent discoveries is James Clear’s weekly 3-2-1 email, which my client told me about. The idea he wrote about last month feels relevant and worth sharing.

Clear wrote, “Forget about the outcome and focus on what precedes it.” He asks, “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

Consider Clear’s question in the context of which actions and thoughts you can focus on to create a joyful, compassion-filled holiday season. They might include:

• Planning

• Lowering your expectations

• Creating boundaries

• Simplifying goals and tasks

• Decluttering

• Scheduling rest and renewal time

What will you choose to focus on to create a positive holiday season?

“We don’t have to be perfect.”

— James Clear

3. One Strategy: “Accept help.”

Do you tend to do everything yourself? Perhaps you don’t want to impose on others. Or, Seth Godin suggests you might think, “Doing the tasks is more efficient than coordinating the help.” Either philosophy results in you doing all the work, which can lead to resentment and exhaustion. Neither of those is a recipe for happy holidays.

Whatever the season, enlisting and accepting help improves your life. We’re human and benefit from the support and interactions with others. What type of help will benefit your life and infuse more ease? Who can you ask for help? How will that change your experience? If you’re having guests over and they offer to help, lean in and say “Yes.” Have tasks ready to delegate. It will make them feel comfortable and reduce pressure from your list.

Godin says, “It’s much more productive to accept help. When we have a project, part of the work is to enlist others in figuring out how to make the change we seek.”

Let me know if you’re stressed and need a thought partner, decluttering and organizing guide, planning help, or accountability buddy. In my virtual organizing sessions, I offer one-hour focused sessions, ongoing support, and personalized guidance to help you with your goals and challenges. I’m available and am ready to help.

Human Holiday

Do you know the 1953 movie Roman Holiday, starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck? This season, I encourage you to embody a Human Holiday.

• Let go of what you can.

• Invite in what you want.

• Enlist the help you need.

For a less stressful and happier holiday season and beyond, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

What becomes possible when you get organized enough? Will you suffer less? Will your mental health and well-being improve due to better organization and flow?

For over 30 years, I have been a professional organizer, helping overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized.

I’ve observed a direct correlation between disorganization and distress. Creating order in the areas within your control significantly improves your external and internal state of being.

Recently, I had the joy of speaking with John Burton, a singer, songwriter, author, and host of the Home From Here podcast. John is fascinated by the intersection of organization and mental health, and he invited me to talk about that and much more on his show.

I invite you to listen to the podcast, episode 193, to hear the entire conversation. You might even discover a few surprising personal details, such as how I start my day, what my household was like growing up, and my favorite color. Although, I bet you can guess that last one even without listening to the podcast. You all know me so well.

Read about these three ideas I featured from our conversation about organization and well-being, and enjoy the podcast, too.

Home From Here - Episode 193 - John Burton with guest Linda Samuels

3 Ways Getting Organized Reduces Suffering and Improves Your Well-Being

1. “Organization made me feel better.”

John Burton, Home From Here podcast host with Linda Samuels - Episode 193

John noticed that organizing specific areas of his life made him feel better. You can learn more about his mental health journey from our conversation. One of the things he mentioned was how life-changing it was to organize his time and habits, especially his morning routine. As John experienced, better organization enhanced his day’s flow and well-being. He “felt better.”

Many of my clients have mental health challenges, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and OCD. The organizing piece has been elusive. Often, the external chaos reflects what’s happening internally. Through our work, I see a positive shift as we remove the disorganization blockages, create manageable systems, and focus on being “organized enough.” It’s not about perfection but about organizing in a way that helps you live with more ease.

What will be possible as you feel better?

2. “If I could only get it all done, life would be perfect.”

John asked me about the “trick” to time management. There are many different philosophies about managing yourself and your time, and there isn’t one definitive trick. However, I’ll share two significant principles of time management.

The first thing to understand about time management is acknowledging that you’ll never get it all done. And just so you know, I say those words as someone who is highly optimistic. People often think life would be perfect if you could “only get it all done.”

Whether your to-do list is in your head, on paper, or on an electronic list, as soon as you cross off a completed task, a new item appears. That’s the human condition. If you’re alive, you will have things to get done.

Even when your list is overflowing, I encourage you to embrace opportunities for joy and delight and let go of perfection. As John said, “If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

The second time management concept is about clarifying your priorities. Focus on aligning your priorities with what you spend time on. In addition, not all tasks will be related to things you’re passionate about. There are life management responsibilities like doing laundry, getting groceries, showering, or paying bills. Those might not excite you, but they are a necessary part of living.

Does all or most of your time go to life maintenance? Is little to no time reserved for your passions or priorities? If so, looking at where your time is going and making some adjustments is helpful.

What becomes possible when your priorities are clarified?

“If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

— John Burton

3. “I can see a path forward.”

John and I discussed virtual organizing and how I typically have 60-minute Zoom sessions with my clients. My goal is to help them get unstuck enough to take action, make progress, and feel better.

At the beginning of a session, clients might feel overwhelmed, discouraged, or hopeless. By the end of the hour, they’ve experienced progress (a physical change, perspective shift, or new system) and can see possibilities.

We take baby steps that boost confidence and agency. Progress happens during and between the organizing sessions. Clients learn organizational skills and how to integrate them into their busy lives.

 What will be possible as you clear your path?

What is Possible?

Toward the end of our conversation, John said he was “struck” by “the amount of reducing suffering” I’m doing.

Life has hiccups and stress. I am passionate about helping my clients get unstuck, make progress, live with more ease, and feel better. Getting organized enough, letting go of perfection, shifting perspectives, and focusing on priorities can make a significant difference. What is possible for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, organize, and improve your well-being? If so, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.

It’s a funny thing about possibilities. Dreaming and imagining are part of a possibility-thinking process. Simultaneously, angst, ambivalence, or uncertainty can also be present. Why is that?

You understand and live your current reality. It may not be how you want it, but it’s familiar. Thinking about alternatives can be thrilling, anxiety-producing, or scary. Change requires time, attention, and resources, which you might or might not have.

Something happened to me recently. Who knew a seemingly simple guest bedroom renovation and organizing project would be such an emotional, satisfying, liberating, and poignant experience?

For years, I wanted to reimagine our guest bedroom. Initially, the room was my art studio and office. After our first daughter, Allison, was born, it became her bedroom. When her sister, Cassie, was born, it became their shared space, “the girls’ room.” Fast-forward to them leaving for college, and it turned into a guest room. However, while I made a few minor changes after they left, I never altered the wall colors, window treatments, or closet.

The girls said, “Mom, you can change the room any way you want. It’s OK.” They repeated this message to me for years. The kids had moved on and kept encouraging me to, too. However, part of me wasn’t ready to let go of certain remnants of their living-at-home years. How could I paint over Allison’s murals or cover up the pencil growth chart markings? Also, I didn’t have the mental bandwidth to figure out how I wanted the room to be until now.

Possibilities Meet the Moment

What shifted? We had other home improvement projects happening, and I knew that the guest room’s time had come. My motivation to make this change was heightened. I didn’t want another year to pass without completing this goal. I was finally ready to turn possibilities into reality.

9 Phases of the Guest Bedroom Project

• Imagine – Envision the possibilities. What do I want the room to look and feel like? How can I make it comfortable for guests and also include functional storage? What will the color scheme be? Can I refer to old vision boards or other visual inspiration sources?

• Plan – Think through the process. How much time do I need to complete this project? Where can we (my husband, Steve, and I) carve out time in our schedule to work on this? How much of this project can we do ourselves? How much outside help do we need? Should we rip out and install a new closet interior or only paint the existing one?

• Gather Resources – Identify vendors and resources. Which vendors can I use for painting and construction, purchasing blinds, framing, buying furniture, and redoing the closet? Which vendors are best for buying organizing containers and other products?

• Budget – Determine the costs. What estimates do I need to get? What will different parts of the project cost (painting, furniture, headboard, bedding, blinds, closet, bins)? What is our overall budget?

• Empty – Prepare the space for transformation. What must be removed from the room to prepare for painting and construction, and when can we empty it? How can I prepare emotionally for the temporary chaos and disruption?

• Renovate – Do the work. How many days will the painter need to prepare, demo the closet, patch, and paint? After the room is painted and before we return the contents, when can Steve install the new Elfa® closet? When can Steve install the new window blinds?

• Edit – Make decisions about room contents. Which items can I let go of by selling, donating, tossing, or giving away? Which things will return to the room? Which items need to be replaced? Which items belong elsewhere?

• Organize – Return ‘keepers’ in an organized way. How will the contents be organized back into the room? Which items will need new storage containers? Do they need labels?

• Finish – Complete the final touches. When will all furniture, lights, books, memorabilia, and games be returned to the room? Which bedding will I use? When can we hang the pictures, mount the wall hooks, and add the door stop? When will I consider the room done?

Emotional Surprises

When we emptied the room to prepare for the painter, I was surprised by how emotional I felt. I was physically handling boxes of the kiddos’ memorabilia, photo albums, books, games, and art. Touching, moving, and looking at objects from the past stirred up many emotions. I felt a powerful combination of gratitude, sadness, joy, and love.

I saw photos and objects from the past. Some images were of loved ones who are no longer alive. I looked at the kids’ art, writings, and school projects. I marveled at our detailed records of the milestones and everyday experiences. It was a journey of emotions as I reflected and remembered the beautiful years we spent raising our daughters.

Even when the room was empty, I could feel the love reverberating within its walls. Cherished memories traveled through time and space, which filled my heart and mind.

“Bringing possibilities to fruition is gratifying.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Practicing Flexibility

During the project, I remained flexible about my options, which was helpful. When a room's contents are removed, many unanticipated things can happen. Gifting yourself the flexibility to make new or different choices is beneficial.

• Closet – The closet required some thought. Do we paint the existing closet or rip it out to install a new one? It would cost more to have a new closet interior. However, time-wise, it seemed most practical to redo it now. Plus, we would gain more storage space.
  

• Furniture – After emptying the room, we liked how spacious it felt with less. While we intended to return the desk, we realized it was unnecessary and took up too much space. I’m letting go of the desk.
  

• Art – After emptying the room and painting the interior, Allison’s murals and other framed art were no longer visible. With blank walls, I reimagined the space. We decided to have more blank wall space and only hang a few pieces, including a new one. I printed and framed one of the landscape photos I had taken in the Finger Lakes.
  

• Memorabilia – I texted the kiddos photos and asked what they wanted to keep. I respected their responses and either let go or kept things accordingly. I also shared several pictures of their projects, writings, and other memorabilia I thought they’d get a kick out of seeing.

9 Lessons Learned

• Imagining possibilities is fun and creative.

• Bringing possibilities to fruition is gratifying.

• Change is refreshing.

• Change encourages more change.

• Emptying one room sparked a reimagining, tweaking, and reorganizing of other areas, such as the pantry and our bedroom.

• Letting go of things that have overstayed their welcome is liberating.

• Life has stages. Organizing your space for the phase you’re in is affirming.

• Embrace gratitude for what was and what is.

The Bedroom Transformation Video

What’s Possible for You?

How does possibility thinking show up for you? What changes have you made or want to make? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, plan a new project, or create new organizing systems? If so, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Moving forward is possible, especially with support.