We spend a good part of our days thinking about what we have to do, want to do, or do. We spend even more time working on getting those things done. And then there are the moments or snapshots that mark time. Sometimes I can conjure up these images, and other times, I’m reminded of the moments from photos. These treasured photos help me remember both the mundane and significant moments that mark the passage of time.

As a parent, some of the significant family moments are things like the births of our children, first days of school, recitals, birthdays, graduations and all the “big” events in between. We know these moments define change. Then there are the beautiful non-event moments that get captured like your child smiling in delight or holding their Daddy’s hand.

“Our time is partly in the planning, but mostly in the moments that make us stop and realize how precious time is.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

As our youngest daughter just went to her senior prom, you can imagine the volume of photos that were taken of her and her friends. The paparazzi of parents gathered together with their cameras to capture this significant moment in their sons’ and daughters’ lives. Some were teary eyed as they watched their “babies” all grown up in their prom attire. Some talked in disbelief wondering, “Where did the time go?”

Photos were taken and our kids went off. The parents remained with instantaneous digital pictures preserving the memory.

As I looked at the prom photos, I thought about other times of “dressing-up.” Our daughters loved putting on costumes whether is was Halloween or not. They’d appear as ballerinas, fairies, princesses or other characters. Hours were spent selecting costumes and playing pretend. Perhaps things haven’t changed so much. They are still dressing up, but differently from when they were little girls.

Our time is partly in the planning, but mostly in the moments that make us stop and realize how precious time is. So, even if you are in the midst of a frenzy of lists to complete and places to go, take some time to stop and appreciate the moment you are in. It all goes way too fast.

What are you appreciating right now?

What is it about us moms and our super-long, seemingly impossible “to-do” lists? Is it because we’re moms – and we want to have it all and can’t say no - that our lists are long and overflowing? Does the endlessness of your “to do” lists cause you to procrastinate or freeze into inactivity? Or do you accept the ongoing challenge of crossing items off as quickly as you’re adding new ones on? However you approach your lists, I’m guessing that at some point, you have experienced some stress and get overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of what you want and need to accomplish every day.

As a mom of two young ladies, soon to be 18 and 20 years old, I am acutely aware of how these lists’ entries have changed over time. When the girls were babies, the “to do” items were things like “buy diapers, make appointment with pediatrician, research Mommy & Me classes, and prep clothes for work.” As they became toddlers, the “to-dos” included “buy pull-ups, arrange playdates, research pre-schools, and prep clothes for work.” When they entered elementary school, the lists had “buy Princess underpants, prepare lunch boxes, fill out school forms, and prep clothes for work. “

Interestingly, as my girls grew, they followed by example and began making their own lists. Is there a gene for list-making? Some of the items that I had always taken care of, they started doing instead.  As they learned to take responsibility for more things, I simultaneously learned how to delegate. I could comfortably ask them, “Please add this to your list.”

It’s fascinating how my daughters developed their own list-making styles. Cassie, our youngest, is a fan of using lined post-it pads with bulleted items listed sequentially. Allison likes to make her lists in small journals using different pages for specific categories. Her titles vary from “Places I’d Like to Visit,”  “Books I Want to Read,” “Ideas That are Interesting,” or “Things To Do Today.”

For me, I use a variety of list-making tricks. I use sticky notes for the quick, singular thought reminders. I keep a Master list of long-term “get to them one-day” items. I use a daily reminder in my electronic calendar for things that need to be accomplished on a specific day. I use index cards with bulleted lists for weekly reminders. Then there’s the satisfying part of picking up my red marker to cross the items off as they are completed.

These days my “to do” lists have fewer kid-related items on them. There are no more diapers to buy. No more lunchboxes to pack. Instead, those items are replaced with things like “write new mom blog, prepare for the radio interview, and prep coaching sessions.”  Even though my girls are very independent, I still have a few remaining things to handle for them. They are: “review college forms, pick-up prom shoes, and order mini cupcakes for graduation.”

Whether you are a working mom at the “buy diapers” stage or at the “buy extra-long sheets for dorm” stage, just know we’ll always have items popping on and off our lists. Those items tell a story of both our children’s growth and ours. So, the next time you feel overwhelmed with all the things you have on your list, stop, and appreciate having them to do. Before you know it, your children will be grown and off making their own lists.

What types of lists do you make? What works well for you? Share your tips.

What is so important about letting go? Why have I devoted chapter four of my book, The Other Side of Organized, to this specific topic? On a daily basis, the work I do with my clients revolves around letting go. Many days are spent editing and releasing papers, clothing, dishes, memorabilia, expired groceries, books, jewelry, toys, gifts, bags and many other items.

Letting go of these physical belongings, especially when they consume space and no longer provide value, transforms the attitude of the person releasing them. While they have had challenges in the past with letting go, when they finally fill bags of items to donate, recycle or discard, they become almost giddy. Their spaces, which felt overwhelming and cluttered, become places that feel good to live in. I feel fortunate that my clients allow me to be part of this transformative process.

What happens when you know it’s time to let go but you aren’t quite ready? The truth is that I’m thinking about a different type of letting go- not things, but children. Our youngest daughter is about to graduate high school. While it’s not time yet, she will be leaving for college in a few short months. After having kids, friends and activities grace our home for 20 plus years, our lives are about to dramatically change. Cassie is excited to be going to college. She’s ready. Intellectually, I know this is a good thing.

While I’ve thought about this time, prepared the best I could, encouraged more independence and pulled back a bit, there is still a pang in my heart because I understand that this beautiful segment of our lives is coming to a close. Sure, we’ll always be parents. Sure, we’ll always be here if our daughters need us. But the way we live day to day will cease to exist as we know it. This is the natural progression of raising kids. You nurture, love and encourage them. Then they go off and make their way in the world. It’s what you raise them to do.

I know a few things about letting go. It’s a necessity. It isn’t easy. But when you are willing to let go of what needs to be released, wonderful things do happen. I know Cassie will spread her wings and perhaps her parents will, too.