There are times when life goes sideways. The unthinkable happens, and you feel you have no control over anything. Your mood is dark, and hope is barely accessible. Cognitively, you understand there are no guarantees in life and that chaos is present. Yet, how do you cope? What can you do when nothing makes sense, and things feel out of control?

I don’t pretend to have the answers or know what you’re experiencing. I’m navigating this challenging time, too. Yet, I have a few strategies that are helping me, which might be helpful to you.

Instead of focusing on the areas you have no control over, shift your attention. Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.

5 Courageous Coping Strategies When Life Feels Out of Control

1. Supercharge Your Self-Care

Take care of yourself. During stressful times, you might ignore the basics. However, doing that makes you feel worse and less able to cope with challenges.

Recommit to self-care basics. Get enough sleep, hydrate, eat nutritiously, and move your body. Walking in nature has additional mood-boosting benefits.

Beyond essential self-care, consider getting a massage, manicure, or pedicure. Or how about taking a yoga, exercise, or meditation class?

Be kind to yourself and engage in intentional, mood-enhancing activities within your control.

“Recommit to self-care basics.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 2. Engage With Your Community

You might want to retreat when feeling out of sorts. However, I encourage you to do the opposite. Reach out to those who are also feeling ‘it.’ You’re not alone.

Your friends and family may be struggling, too. Connect with your loved ones. Pool your strengths while offering and receiving support.

3. Curate the Input

Scrolling social media, listening to the news, and fueling the fire may not be the healthiest choice. Cut yourself off (even if temporarily) when the external input you’re allowing adds to those out-of-control feelings.

Just as I encouraged you to eat nutritious foods to nourish your body, do something similar for your mind. Curate the input to minimize anxiety-producing thoughts and maximize ones with a more positive effect.

This could be a great time to read that new book or your favorite magazine from cover to cover. Or maybe you prefer to watch a comedy show or movie.

I’m not suggesting you ignore the outside world forever, but for this day, while building your resilience, choose to disengage with stress-inducing news. Control the input.

“Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Make Something

There is a gift in making something from nothing. What kind of something? Maybe you like to bake, write blog posts or in journals, take photographs, write poetry, or knit scarves. Perhaps you want to paint, write music, do a craft project, or create fancy cocktails.

Take control of a joy-inducing physical activity and make something. Enjoy the process and the result.

I’ve already journaled and worked on this post. Guess what else I did? I baked (and ate) some Almond Butter Chocolate Chip cookies. Fortunately, these cookies are not only delicious but also nutritious. I just have to remember to eat them in moderation. Wish me luck.

5. Declutter Your Space

Physical disorganization and chaos in your environment can affect how you feel and function. The disarray adds to a feeling of lack of control. You don’t know where things are or have the mind space to focus.

There is mood-boosting power in decluttering and organizing. The act of doing, making a change, and then experiencing the benefits of that shift is palpable.

You can’t control everything, but you can improve your corner of the world (or desk).

Human Coping Skills

Remember, you are resilient, and you have people to lean on. To help navigate challenging times, exert control in tiny yet significant ways. This won’t change everything, but it will help to calm and ground you. What coping strategies do you use when life feels chaotic?

If you need help decluttering, organizing, planning, or grounding, I’m here for you. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling the fast whoosh of time passing with the holiday season arriving, the elections looming, and the year ending? It’s a lot to take in. You may feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you’re thinking about what goals you wanted to accomplish this year, the time left to do it, and what is actually possible.

Maybe your thoughts are occupied with ‘regular’ life maintenance to-dos plus hundreds of holiday-related tasks, including gift shopping, holiday meal prepping, guestroom readying, travel planning, and family and friends’ gatherings.

Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.

I often say that life is in the joyful doing and presence of the moment. And while that’s all well and good, when you’re stressed and overwhelmed, accessing that presence can be more challenging.

With so much going on with work and family, externally and internally, this time of year, making tiny adjustments is helpful. Infusing compassion and mindfulness into your thoughts and actions will encourage a more joyful, fulfilling, and happier holiday season.

I offer you a thought, question, and strategy to help.

3 Ways to Prepare for a Compassionate Holiday Season

1. One Thought: “We don’t have to be perfect.”

Let’s remove the idea of perfection from the holiday season. Why impose more pressure, stress, or unrealistic expectations on yourself or others?

Try channeling your perfectionism energy differently. Focus your energy on one of these options instead:

• Excellence

• Personal best

• Good enough

• Progress

• Ease

• Done

As the Noom app said about overcoming thought distortions, “…it’s about recognizing that we don’t have to be perfect. We’re human.”

Which reframe of perfectionism (one suggested or something else) is helpful for you?

“Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. One Question: “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

One of my favorite recent discoveries is James Clear’s weekly 3-2-1 email, which my client told me about. The idea he wrote about last month feels relevant and worth sharing.

Clear wrote, “Forget about the outcome and focus on what precedes it.” He asks, “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

Consider Clear’s question in the context of which actions and thoughts you can focus on to create a joyful, compassion-filled holiday season. They might include:

• Planning

• Lowering your expectations

• Creating boundaries

• Simplifying goals and tasks

• Decluttering

• Scheduling rest and renewal time

What will you choose to focus on to create a positive holiday season?

“We don’t have to be perfect.”

— James Clear

3. One Strategy: “Accept help.”

Do you tend to do everything yourself? Perhaps you don’t want to impose on others. Or, Seth Godin suggests you might think, “Doing the tasks is more efficient than coordinating the help.” Either philosophy results in you doing all the work, which can lead to resentment and exhaustion. Neither of those is a recipe for happy holidays.

Whatever the season, enlisting and accepting help improves your life. We’re human and benefit from the support and interactions with others. What type of help will benefit your life and infuse more ease? Who can you ask for help? How will that change your experience? If you’re having guests over and they offer to help, lean in and say “Yes.” Have tasks ready to delegate. It will make them feel comfortable and reduce pressure from your list.

Godin says, “It’s much more productive to accept help. When we have a project, part of the work is to enlist others in figuring out how to make the change we seek.”

Let me know if you’re stressed and need a thought partner, decluttering and organizing guide, planning help, or accountability buddy. In my virtual organizing sessions, I offer one-hour focused sessions, ongoing support, and personalized guidance to help you with your goals and challenges. I’m available and am ready to help.

Human Holiday

Do you know the 1953 movie Roman Holiday, starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck? This season, I encourage you to embody a Human Holiday.

• Let go of what you can.

• Invite in what you want.

• Enlist the help you need.

For a less stressful and happier holiday season and beyond, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Inspiration abounds. The fall season in the northeast profoundly influences my thoughts about possibilities. Seeing the bold color shift to saturated yellows, oranges, and reds encourages me to seek change.

Last week, I wrote about my guest bedroom makeover. I considered what was possible, turned those ideas into reality, and was motivated to make more changes.

I made additional unplanned tweaks and changes that were outgrowths influenced by the bedroom project. When you disrupt an area, physical space, and objects are moved. This spatial churning also affects thoughts. Undoing what was in one room opened my mind to seeing and experimenting in other areas.

Sometimes, you feel set and don’t have the need or desire to change anything. Those times can last for brief periods, months, or years. At a point, though, something will interrupt that state. You are ready to try something different, reorganize systems, or make significant life shifts.

Possibilities infiltrate your thoughts. When possibilities are paired with action, change occurs.

3 Unexpected Outcomes from Possibility Thinking

1. Discover Giddy, Joyful Ease

I’ll admit this openly: I love decorative pillows. They’re textural and colorful and instantly change the look of a room. Typically, I have no less than five pillows adorning the sofa or beds.

As you might imagine, keeping the pillows fluffed and arranged can be a pain. Plus, you need extra time to undo and make the beds—pillows off, pillows on. However, I was happy to do the pillow maintenance dance because I loved how they looked and felt. I was willing until recently.

When I transformed the guest bedroom, I rethought the decorative pillow arrangement on that bed. That encouraged me to reconsider the pillow situation in our bedroom. I’m almost embarrassed to say, but we had ten pillows, only two of which we used for sleep. As I write this, I’m laughing out loud. I never counted them up before. Ten pillows are ridiculous.

My supportive husband has always accepted my pillow obsession but recently started questioning their necessity. Between his input and my desire to reimagine other areas of our home, I felt emboldened to change things.

Our bed now has only four sleep pillows and one decorative pillow. I feel giddy, even joyful, when I undo the bed at night or make it in the morning. It’s so easy that it almost feels wrong. I love it!

It took a change in one room to open my mind to possibilities in other areas. The wheels continue to turn.

“When you release what is unnecessary, you clear the path for possibilities.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. Create Organization and Accessibility

One of the most fabulous products I discovered during the bedroom renovation was the Elfa® drawer dividers. We redid the guest bedroom closet with an Elfa® system from The Container Store. The designer suggested using the drawer dividers. I loved them so much that I purchased more for other areas where I have Elfa® drawers.

I showcased them in the tea bag overflow drawer a few weeks ago. Since then, I decided to reorganize the gift wrap supply drawers using the dividers. Instead of the gift bags, tags, ribbons, and other supplies moving around each time I opened a drawer, the dividers keep items better organized and securely in place.

Since the drawer organization upgrade, I’ve wrapped a few gifts. It was so easy and fun! The supplies are more visible, accessible, and visually pleasing.

Enjoy this fun video, which demonstrates how easy the drawer dividers are to install.

3. Right-Size Your Stuff

I often discuss how letting go of things that have overstayed their welcome makes space for more of what you want in your life. Clutter or extra stuff you never use takes up physical and emotional space. When you release what is unnecessary, you clear the path for possibilities.

When we emptied the guest bedroom, it gave me pause to assess the removed items and make decisions about their future. I did ‘the edit’ and engaged in various questions to help me evaluate what to keep or let go. I asked letting go questions, including:

• Does this fit or belong in the newly reimagined space?

• Will I use it?

• Do I still like it?

• Could it go somewhere else?

• Is it time to let it go?

• Has it served its purpose and is no longer necessary?

I made decisions. Cardboard storage boxes were recycled and replaced with new containers. Some furniture, art, home goods, boxes, and decorative pillows (yes, those!) will be sold or donated.

Currently, I still have a pile of items waiting to be gone. Getting them out requires my time and attention. Using Facebook Marketplace, GreenDrop, or the Buy Nothing Group, things will exit. I am confident in my decisions and ready to release things.

This process began with thinking about possibilities in one space and resulted in letting go of things that are no longer needed. It feels good and will feel even better when the pile is gone.

What Possibilities Are Ahead?

What no longer works for you? What becomes possible with a slight tweak? What possibility will inspire more organization and ease into your life? How can letting go create a path for new opportunities? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to move forward, get organized, and live with more ease? If so, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.

It’s a funny thing about possibilities. Dreaming and imagining are part of a possibility-thinking process. Simultaneously, angst, ambivalence, or uncertainty can also be present. Why is that?

You understand and live your current reality. It may not be how you want it, but it’s familiar. Thinking about alternatives can be thrilling, anxiety-producing, or scary. Change requires time, attention, and resources, which you might or might not have.

Something happened to me recently. Who knew a seemingly simple guest bedroom renovation and organizing project would be such an emotional, satisfying, liberating, and poignant experience?

For years, I wanted to reimagine our guest bedroom. Initially, the room was my art studio and office. After our first daughter, Allison, was born, it became her bedroom. When her sister, Cassie, was born, it became their shared space, “the girls’ room.” Fast-forward to them leaving for college, and it turned into a guest room. However, while I made a few minor changes after they left, I never altered the wall colors, window treatments, or closet.

The girls said, “Mom, you can change the room any way you want. It’s OK.” They repeated this message to me for years. The kids had moved on and kept encouraging me to, too. However, part of me wasn’t ready to let go of certain remnants of their living-at-home years. How could I paint over Allison’s murals or cover up the pencil growth chart markings? Also, I didn’t have the mental bandwidth to figure out how I wanted the room to be until now.

Possibilities Meet the Moment

What shifted? We had other home improvement projects happening, and I knew that the guest room’s time had come. My motivation to make this change was heightened. I didn’t want another year to pass without completing this goal. I was finally ready to turn possibilities into reality.

9 Phases of the Guest Bedroom Project

• Imagine – Envision the possibilities. What do I want the room to look and feel like? How can I make it comfortable for guests and also include functional storage? What will the color scheme be? Can I refer to old vision boards or other visual inspiration sources?

• Plan – Think through the process. How much time do I need to complete this project? Where can we (my husband, Steve, and I) carve out time in our schedule to work on this? How much of this project can we do ourselves? How much outside help do we need? Should we rip out and install a new closet interior or only paint the existing one?

• Gather Resources – Identify vendors and resources. Which vendors can I use for painting and construction, purchasing blinds, framing, buying furniture, and redoing the closet? Which vendors are best for buying organizing containers and other products?

• Budget – Determine the costs. What estimates do I need to get? What will different parts of the project cost (painting, furniture, headboard, bedding, blinds, closet, bins)? What is our overall budget?

• Empty – Prepare the space for transformation. What must be removed from the room to prepare for painting and construction, and when can we empty it? How can I prepare emotionally for the temporary chaos and disruption?

• Renovate – Do the work. How many days will the painter need to prepare, demo the closet, patch, and paint? After the room is painted and before we return the contents, when can Steve install the new Elfa® closet? When can Steve install the new window blinds?

• Edit – Make decisions about room contents. Which items can I let go of by selling, donating, tossing, or giving away? Which things will return to the room? Which items need to be replaced? Which items belong elsewhere?

• Organize – Return ‘keepers’ in an organized way. How will the contents be organized back into the room? Which items will need new storage containers? Do they need labels?

• Finish – Complete the final touches. When will all furniture, lights, books, memorabilia, and games be returned to the room? Which bedding will I use? When can we hang the pictures, mount the wall hooks, and add the door stop? When will I consider the room done?

Emotional Surprises

When we emptied the room to prepare for the painter, I was surprised by how emotional I felt. I was physically handling boxes of the kiddos’ memorabilia, photo albums, books, games, and art. Touching, moving, and looking at objects from the past stirred up many emotions. I felt a powerful combination of gratitude, sadness, joy, and love.

I saw photos and objects from the past. Some images were of loved ones who are no longer alive. I looked at the kids’ art, writings, and school projects. I marveled at our detailed records of the milestones and everyday experiences. It was a journey of emotions as I reflected and remembered the beautiful years we spent raising our daughters.

Even when the room was empty, I could feel the love reverberating within its walls. Cherished memories traveled through time and space, which filled my heart and mind.

“Bringing possibilities to fruition is gratifying.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Practicing Flexibility

During the project, I remained flexible about my options, which was helpful. When a room's contents are removed, many unanticipated things can happen. Gifting yourself the flexibility to make new or different choices is beneficial.

• Closet – The closet required some thought. Do we paint the existing closet or rip it out to install a new one? It would cost more to have a new closet interior. However, time-wise, it seemed most practical to redo it now. Plus, we would gain more storage space.
  

• Furniture – After emptying the room, we liked how spacious it felt with less. While we intended to return the desk, we realized it was unnecessary and took up too much space. I’m letting go of the desk.
  

• Art – After emptying the room and painting the interior, Allison’s murals and other framed art were no longer visible. With blank walls, I reimagined the space. We decided to have more blank wall space and only hang a few pieces, including a new one. I printed and framed one of the landscape photos I had taken in the Finger Lakes.
  

• Memorabilia – I texted the kiddos photos and asked what they wanted to keep. I respected their responses and either let go or kept things accordingly. I also shared several pictures of their projects, writings, and other memorabilia I thought they’d get a kick out of seeing.

9 Lessons Learned

• Imagining possibilities is fun and creative.

• Bringing possibilities to fruition is gratifying.

• Change is refreshing.

• Change encourages more change.

• Emptying one room sparked a reimagining, tweaking, and reorganizing of other areas, such as the pantry and our bedroom.

• Letting go of things that have overstayed their welcome is liberating.

• Life has stages. Organizing your space for the phase you’re in is affirming.

• Embrace gratitude for what was and what is.

The Bedroom Transformation Video

What’s Possible for You?

How does possibility thinking show up for you? What changes have you made or want to make? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, plan a new project, or create new organizing systems? If so, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Moving forward is possible, especially with support.