Geralin Thomas, Metropolitan OrganizingWe’ve had a tremendously positive response to our “Ask the Expert” feature on The Other Side of Organized blog. In February, John Ryan of The Life Change Network talked about change. In March, Yota Schneider of Open for Success spoke about next steps. This month, I’m excited to introduce you to the vivacious professional organizer, Geralin Thomas to share her wisdom with you about letting go.

Geralin is a wonderful friend and colleague with tremendous energy, style, and grace. My gratitude and thanks goes to her for taking the time to join us.

Geralin Thomas is a professional organizer that trains new professional organizers, provides residential organizing services, and works with hoarding clients. She is founder of Metropolitan Organizing and has been featured on A&E’s Hoarders, The Nate Berkus Show and Today. Geralin is a wife, mother, gardener, painter, documentary lover, and has a passion for fashion. You can connect with her on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, blog or website.

Linda:  You are a professional organizer helping clients transform their homes from chaos to calm. You also specialize in working with people that hoard. Why is letting go so challenging for some?

Geralin:  Some folks are sentimental savers. They might say, “Oh, my son made this macaroni necklace for me when he was in 1^st grade; I’ve gotta keep it.” Others are utilitarian savers. They could say, “The reason I hang onto all these old tuna cans is because I plan on welding them together to make a lamp for my dog’s house.” A person with a hoarding disorder has these same exact struggles, but they are much more intense. They over-accumulate and find it extremely difficult to let go of things they’ve acquired.

Linda:  If someone is struggling with letting go, what do you suggest?

Geralin: When someone is struggling with letting go, I encourage them to read a blog post I wrote related to this topic, “The 4 Personalities that Save Stuff.” It’s been useful for many of my clients. In addition, I’ve heard from several therapists and social workers that shared it with their clients say it was helpful for them as well.

Linda:  What has been your biggest personal challenge around letting go?

Geralin: Oh, I always dread this question because I’m not a sentimental person and our culture seems to believe that women are supposed to be sentimental.  For me, letting go isn’t a challenge. I don’t save cards, awards, certificates, photos, trophies  – none of that stuff matters to me; it’s just stuff.  Same for projects – I’m very aware of how much or little time I have for projects so typically, all those DIY projects look and sound great but at this point in my life, I don’t have time for them so I don’t accumulate a lot of task-related stuff.  I’d rather spend my time painting or gardening.

Linda:  Do you have a letting go philosophy?

Geralin: I ask someone struggling with clutter if they want to surround themselves with meaningful things. If they answer in the affirmative, I ask, “Is this [thing] beautiful? Useful? Helpful? Does it resonate with who you are right this moment?”  Sometimes people hang onto things that represent who they used to be. Examples include “special occasion” serving dishes or “trophy” sizes of clothes.

Linda:  Is there anything you’d like to share that I haven’t asked?

Geralin: How about I share one of my challenges?  We all have our challenges and mine is packing a suitcase. Let’s just say that if you are stuck on a runway for three hours, you want to sit next to me because I’ll have nuts, chocolates, reading material, manicure supplies, dental floss, tissues, etc.

Warmest thanks, Geralin for taking the time to share your insightful, clear thoughts about letting go. I invite all of you to join Geralin and me as we continue the conversation. What are your thoughts, experiences or questions about letting go? 

Even in the blooming, there’s a letting go. The other day, as I drove down the block, I was amazed by how quickly the flowering trees had bloomed and then released those blooms. They seemed to blossom overnight and drop their flowers in less than a week. I noticed that once the flowers were down, new growth appeared on the branches. The trees went from being naked, to flower covered, to bathed with green buds. Each day since, the buds have opened into beautiful green leaves, full of life.

I was thinking how similar this is to our own letting go experience. While it seems that we should just be able to let go and be done, in fact, it’s very much a process, and not a singular event. Like the trees, we begin where we are. We grow, but in order to have more growth, we must be willing to release even those things, which are beautiful. We let the first blooms drop to make room for new ones. This process continues.

The opposite of letting go is holding on. Draw inspiration from this spring season. Be willing to let go of the mind and physical clutter that’s weighing you down, the negative thoughts that are stifling your success, the “yeses” in your too-busy schedule that are causing undue stress, and the micromanaging of everyone and everything.

What will you let go of? What will become possible for you? Where are your growth opportunities? Your thoughts are important. Come join in the conversation about holding on, letting go, and growing.

Letting go of stuff, negative thoughts, bad energy, and certain patterns can have the most rejuvenating effect. Recently this spring, I took some time doing just that. I let go of some things that needed releasing. If you're in need of an energy boost, maybe some of these ideas will be beneficial for you too. Peruse the list and try one.

3 Tips for Letting Go

1. Clutter Clearing:  Maybe the clutter is a small pile on the corner of your desk that feels like a mountain. Perhaps the clutter is your pile of clothes covering the bottom of your closet that makes it difficult to get dressed. Whatever and wherever the clutter is, spend some time sorting, releasing, and claiming back your space. I've had a growing pile of papers on my desk for too long. Each piece represented something to do, someone to call, a great idea to consider, or a random piece of intriguing information. When I finally decided, "Today's the day!” I filed, acted, and released. I felt so much lighter and happier. My thoughts were clearer, and so was my desk.

2. Thought Busters:  It's been an unusual and more stressful time than normal. Between losing my dad, having other family and friends in the hospital, running a business, going away for the annual NAPO conference, taking coaching classes, and working with coaching clients, I've felt overwhelmed. Things are beginning to calm down after many months of being overloaded. I finally realized how unhelpful it was to continue verbalizing the stress. It only fueled my negative thoughts. Instead, I decided to redirect my words to be more encouraging. I’ve decided to say, "I am doing my best, and that's good enough." I'm letting go of the guilt over what I'm not doing or could be doing. This is liberating.

3. Energy Boosters:  Are there people, things, or places that zap your sparkle? Is it time to let go of them? Paying attention to the things that deplete you is an important step in figuring out what to release. On the positive side, it's as important to be aware of what restores your energy. When we let go of the things that are troubling us, we make space for things that are nourishing. For me, I've been spending too much time inside. Instead of writing this post on my desktop, I went outdoors to write. I was able to enjoy the beautiful, sun-filled day. There was a slight breeze, the swooshing sound of the leaves rustling, birds chirping, and a distant woodpecker tapping. I could feel myself recharging as I sat and wrote. I let go of where I thought I should be writing and changed my environment. It made a huge difference. Be willing to move, shift and release. The outcome will surprise you.

What is your favorite letting go tip or experience? I invite you to join our conversation and share your thoughts.

Yota Schneider, Open for SuccessLife transitions coach, Yota Schneider shares more perspectives about next steps in this two-part interview. In Part 1, Yota talked with me about many things including key ingredients for making successful choices and navigating the uncertainty gap.  Our conversation continues as she shares more insights with us. Before we begin, here’s some background about Yota.

Yota Schneider is a life transitions coach working with people who want to explore the hidden gifts and opportunities of change in their lives. Her approach is inspiring, practical, and empowering. As a Seasons of Change certified Master Coach and a mindfulness meditation practitioner, Yota uses a variety of tools and strategies to help her clients overcome self-doubt, gain a new perspective on life’s ups and downs, and make decisions and choices that are fueled by greater clarity and a renewed sense of purpose. You can connect with her on Twitter, Facebook or her website.

Linda:  Why do we get stuck and have difficulty moving forward?

Yota:  Change isn’t easy. Whether it’s our choice or not, we still have to adapt to a new way of being and that can be intimidating.

During times of transition we come up against our fears, disempowering beliefs and habits, unrealistic expectations, and external pressure. There are practical matters to cope with, growing pains to tolerate and let’s not forget, timing. There’s a time for everything. Time plays by it’s own rules. We have no control over some things.

Being stuck and having difficulty moving forward can be a good thing because it gives us the time and space we need to do our homework and become the kind of person who can recognize, appreciate and take full advantage of what comes next.

Unless being stuck and unable to more forward is rooted in some chronic life issue that needs to be dealt with, use this time as a time of exploration and discovery. Let go of the stigma and look at it from a place of curiosity.

Linda:  What has been your biggest personal challenge around figuring out the next step?

Yota:  Patience isn’t my strong suit. I am no different than many people who want things done yesterday. I also have the tendency to be hard on my self. At times of transition, when nothing is quite clear and the day-to-day needs are pressing on me, I can hear the voice in my head saying, “Not again. You should know better by now. Why in the world can’t you be like other people?”

I guess that’s why I love working with people who are being challenged from the inside out. I know the drill all too well. Over the years and through the many changes and transitions I’ve experienced, I’ve learned to work with the voice of doubt and fear.

I hear it and recognize it for what it is- the voice of self-doubt. I don’t fight it, but I don’t welcome it either. I just recognize and breathe through it. I take good care of myself. I give my attention to what’s right in front of me. I become selective of whom I surround myself with. I read, journal, meditate, work in my garden, and take long walks. I try to honor that part of me that needs to be quiet, still, and creative. I go with the flow. When I fall, I pick myself up gently.

Over the years, I’ve learned and am still learning, what it means to be kind to one self. Life can be difficult at times. I don’t have to make things more difficult than they already are.

Linda:  What is the most surprising discovery about figuring out “next”?

Yota:  I’ve been through enough changes and maybe I shouldn’t be surprised by what I’m going to share with you, yet, I always catch myself in awe about these two points.

First, what needs to change will always change. Fighting against the inevitable makes things more difficult than they ought to be.  Once, we stop resisting and let go of the need to know why it happened, the process of figuring out “what’s next” is a lot easier than we think.

Next, no matter how difficult a transition may be and how impatient we may grow or how many tantrums we may throw in the process, things will unravel at their own pace. Then, one day we open our eyes as if waking up from a long winter’s nap, and find ourselves exactly where we belong. We feel renewed, refreshed, and ready for another round.

Linda:  Is there anything you’d like to share that I haven’t asked?

Yota:  You’ve been really thorough, Linda. The one thing that comes to mind is what happens after we’ve embarked on our “next” stage.

Many either don’t know how to or forget to celebrate the warmth of summer after a long and cold winter. Many of us tend to look over our shoulder, waiting for the next shoe to drop, even as we’re embraced by success. Lousy habit, don’t you think?

Remember the importance to celebrate as we go. There’s so much to be grateful for. Why not take inventory, count our blessings, celebrate our success and the completion of yet, another journey? Change will come around again but, in the meantime, let’s celebrate what we have, what we learned, and share our gifts with others. It’s like storing sunny memories for when the cold of winter comes around again. It comes handy.

Thank you so much for inviting me to discuss one of my favorite subjects. I can’t wait to see what your readers share about their experience.

Thank you, Yota for your wonderful thoughts about next steps. I invite all of you to join us as we continue the conversation. What are your thoughts, experiences or questions about next steps?