Do you create obstacles for yourself before embarking on the next step? These might include a list of self-imposed pre-requirements before you can take the next step or tackle a new project.

Perhaps your goal is spring cleaning and organizing. While that’s a great goal, instead of beginning the process, you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step.

For instance, you prefer tackling this project in big time blocks rather than shorter, focused sessions. However, your life commitments and energy levels aren’t conducive to organizing three, four, or five hours at a time.

As a result, what happens? Things stagnate because you don’t have large swaths of time to move your project forward. You frontloaded the project with an obstacle that closed your mind to alternative solutions and experimentation.

Does this sound familiar?

What Are Toxic Preconditions?

A few weeks ago, I discovered the term “toxic preconditions” in Oliver Burkeman’s newsletter, The Imperfectionist. He learned this concept from James Horton, a social scientist who questioned why people who want to write more don’t.

Horton observed that some aspiring writers had “misguided beliefs” that might have seemed helpful but undermined their confidence, causing them to write less or not at all.

Burkeman says that what’s behind toxic preconditions is “the strong desire we have for some kind of guarantee – before we embark on a new activity, or even allow ourselves to relax into life – that it’ll all unfold safely and securely, that we’ll retain the feeling of being in control.”

He advocates how freeing it is to let go of that need for a “guarantee.” Burkeman says, “Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.” He goes on to say, “You never had control; all you had was anxiety.”

“Do you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Letting Go of Toxic Preconditions

There are three aspects for releasing toxic preconditions:

1. Observe – Notice when you are putting up obstacles to the extent that you can’t move toward your goal or next step.

2. Accept – Acknowledge there are no guarantees. Instead, move forward with curiosity, openness, and a willingness to experiment.

3. Release – Let go of any preconditions that are toxic. Be willing to take that next step without first doing a, b, c, d, or e. Go forth without all the i’s dotted and t’s crossed.

I want to re-establish my daily walking habit. In the past months, I put up obstacles based on the weather, which I can’t control. I won't walk every day if I’m only willing to walk when it’s warm and sunny. I’ve been telling myself, “It’s too cold.” Or, “It’s too dreary.” If, instead, I adjust the parameters, like the length of a walk, wearing more layers, or walking inside instead of out, I’ll be more likely to reach my daily walking goal.

“Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.”

— Oliver Burkeman

What’s On the Other Side of Toxicity?

Let’s face it. Life has challenges. However, how often do you create obstacles and make things more complicated than necessary? If you tend to hinder your progress, I encourage you to explore new options. Release those toxic preconditions that aren’t serving you. Experience more movement, flow, and success.

Have you encountered toxic preconditions in others or yourself? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, editing, planning, or working on that next step? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Figuring out next is possible, especially with support.

Making a change in your life can be challenging. Have you ever wondered why? Here are some common obstacles you might encounter:

• Feeling unsure about how to create the change you desire

• Feeling defeated as the change you desire appears unattainable

• Feeling a lack of energy or resources to manifest the change

• Feeling overwhelmed by other responsibilities in your life makes focusing on intentional change seem unrealistic right now

• Feeling frustrated by the time needed to create change

• Feeling unclear about the change you want to make

• Feeling resentful that you want to make a change but would rather focus on less stressful activities

• Feeling the absence of a support system

Yet, despite these potential difficulties, you still want to make a change. Change is possible when you’re in a negative, stress-filled state, but it’s more challenging. What if you could create a starting point that is more conducive and encouraging?

I recently discovered something that could be a game-changer (no pun intended).

The Value of a Morning Activation Ritual

In Joseph Nguyen’s book Don’t Believe Everything You Think – Why Your Thinking is the Beginning & End of Suffering, I read a passage about developing an “activation ritual.” While Nguyen applied this concept to reduce stressful thoughts, I can see how the idea of rituals could be useful for facilitating change.

Nguyen says, “Most of us are used to spending the majority of our day in a state of stress (thinking).” However, when you stop thinking and stressing, that energy can be redirected elsewhere. Without channeling it elsewhere, you will likely revert to a thinking and stressful state.

He suggests creating a morning activation ritual that helps you “get back into a state of non-thinking and flow. It can be an activity that helps you feel grounded and allows you to practice getting into a state of non-thinking.”

Consider centering activities such as meditating, exercising, journaling, or making tea. “An activation ritual enables you to build momentum in a positive direction immediately when you wake up so that it’s easier to stay in that state of non-thinking for the rest of the day.” Nguyen suggests that it’s possible to “channel the newfound energy into our goals of inspiration.”

“An activation ritual enables you to build momentum in a positive direction . . .”

— Joseph Nguyen

Create Your Activation Ritual

Do you start your day gently with a nourishing and grounding routine? Or are your mornings often rushed and chaotic?

You have the opportunity to create a centering morning ritual that will energize you, reduce stress, and enhance your ability to make the change you desire.

Here is one approach to creating an activation ritual:

• Establish a consistent wake-up time.

• Select one grounding activity before beginning your day, such as exercising, meditating, or journaling.

• Do this for one week.

• Observe what happened.

• Depending on what you discovered, continue or alter your activation ritual.

Beginning the day feeling grounded and nourished will cultivate an internal state that promotes the change you want.

What change would you like to make? How can a morning activation ritual benefit you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support creating routines, organizing, planning, or inviting positive change? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling exhausted after meeting a deadline or finishing a project? While hyper-drive may be necessary to reach completion, downshifting is essential afterward.

Over the past month, I worked hard on the chapter I wrote for the new ICD (Institute for Challenging Disorganization) book to meet their short, time-sensitive deadline. I am excited to have written the chapter on client support and look forward to sharing more once it is published later this year.

How does this relate to fresh starts? The writing deadline straddled the end of one year and the beginning of another. The time I typically take to wrap things up and reimagine what’s next was allocated to the book project. Instead of slowing down as the year closed, things sped up and kept going until earlier this week when I submitted my draft.

Completing the deadline helped reaffirm the necessity of taking a moment to breathe. This slow exhalation is the break I need to refocus my energy and plan what comes next. I identified several elements that I hope you’ll find helpful the next time you are about to switch gears.

3 Ways to Exhale & Refocus Your Energy

1. Reflect

Doing a post-deadline debrief, thinking about how I approached the book project and what I learned, was valuable and affirming.

These are some reflections:

• Clarified the chapter’s content and description with the committee

• Made time estimates for how long it would take to write the chapter

• Scheduled writing blocks on my calendar

• Said “no” to things that would distract from my objectives

• Remained flexible with scheduling and idea development

• Developed an outline of topics to cover

• Made a plan for how to approach the various sections

• Hired an accountability partner (thank you, Lana) to keep me on track

• Set weekly goals

• Logged hours and other metrics

• Journaled

Another aspect I noticed was how my weekly blog writing routine prepared me for this project. My well-established writing tools and rituals made writing easier during the scheduled “ICD Book Project” writing blocks. When things didn’t go well during a particular block, I wasn’t discouraged, as I knew it was a normal part of the writing. I had built up resiliency through experiencing similar ups and downs with blogging.

Hiring an accountability partner was incredibly beneficial for the book project, especially because of the tight deadline. It was also fascinating to experience and fully appreciate the benefits from the “lived” perspective. While I have received a lot of positive feedback from my clients, I better understand why they say having me as their accountability partner is helpful. I get it.

2. Sense

I just finished reading a wonderful book How to Winter, by Kari Leibowitz, PhD. I highly recommend it, especially if you’re interested in the far-reaching benefits of developing a “positive wintertime mindset.”

One of the things that she wrote about was how to develop an awareness of those things you love about winter, like:

• the “fresh” smell of the air that slow-moving molecules create

• the cozy warmth of being around a firepit

• the delight of sipping hot cocoa with marshmallows or

• the happy sensation of curling up with a warm blanket and book

While I engage regularly with my senses, I noticed how they were heightened during this transition time because I was reading Leibowitz’s book. When I was outside, instead of thinking about how cold I was, I breathed in the crisp air and appreciated the cyclical nature of the dormant, bare trees. Instead of feeling guilty for wanting to go to bed earlier, I recognized the value of rest and delighted in the visceral calming effects of my bedtime rituals.

Appreciating and sensing is a gentle way to experience presence and gratitude for what is here now. Lingering in this presence through my senses removes concern about what will be next and helps replenish my energy.

Of all things, as if on cue, the snow just started falling. At first, the flakes were sparse and descended slowly. Then, the flow and pace increased as the sky and landscape turned white. We’re expecting five to seven inches of snow over the following hours. I’m so excited! Perhaps there will be some hot cocoa in my future. A white covering will soon transform everything. Talk about a clean slate! It’s the perfect visual to encourage a fresh start.

“While hyper-drive may be necessary to reach completion, downshifting is essential afterward.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

3. Nourish

Engaging in nourishing activities that support your well-being is another way to slow down and refocus your energy. When you have exerted a lot of effort, balancing it with restorative practices is vital.

My supportive activities include meditation, yoga, walking, and journaling. There are others, too, like exploring new places, seeing friends and family, watching movies, eating healthfully, or getting enough sleep.

And then there’s soup—yes, soup! Making and eating soup is a thoroughly enriching activity for me. I love washing and chopping ingredients, adding them to the big pot, and creating a delicious meal with a few simple, fresh items.

After hours of simmering, my husband and I will share this hot meal as we look out the dining room window into the chilly night, watching the snow gently fall. Maybe we’ll even eat by candlelight. If that’s not cozy and nourishing, I don’t know what is.

What helps you slow down and restore energy? How can taking a restorative break energize your fresh start? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or restoring energy? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.

You have arrived. The page has turned, and a new year has just begun. Do you feel the weight of last year? Are your thoughts occupied by unfinished projects or goals never reached?

Hi, friend. You are not alone. As much as you wanted to wrap up one year with a neat little bow, it wasn’t possible. You have leftovers and incompletes that are still in progress. I’m here with you.

Some things take longer or have deadlines that extend from one year to the next. While you want to move on and truly engage with a fresh start, you aren’t ready yet. However, I’ve got good news.

There is one small thing you can do to help change your energy in a positive direction during this transition time. It will lift that weight and reframe what a fresh start can be.

Reframe Your Fresh Start

Consider the “reset button,” which Glennon Doyle referred to in Untamed. Push that imaginary button to clear your mind and prepare for what’s next. This is especially useful when you feel stressed, anxious, stuck, in between, or pressured.

When you identify your preferred buttons, you can access them anytime to reset and start fresh. This viable strategy is not time-specific. You can use this simple practice today, tomorrow, or months from now.

What is the Reset Button?

As Doyle says, “My reset buttons are just little things.” Her list includes:

“Drink a glass of water.

Take a walk.

Take a bath.

Practice yoga.

Meditate.

Go to the beach and watch the waves.

Play with my dog.

Hug my wife and kids.

Hide the phone.”

As you read those, did you imagine the resets working for you? Did they spark other ‘button’ ideas?

I have most of Doyle’s buttons on my list, although I no longer have a dog to play with and prefer a hot cup of tea to a glass of water.

“My reset buttons are just little things.”

— Glennon Doyle

These additional resets also help me:

• Write in my journal.

• Talk with a friend.

• Run an errand.

• Have a snack.

• Make the bed.

• Clean the kitchen counters.

• Get a pedicure.

• Watch water flow.

• Wash and moisturize my face.

• Do something new or outside of my routine.

Your Fantastic Fresh Start

Release your worry and angst. Invite in patience and perseverance. Get out your button-pushing finger and get ready to press the reset. You can:

• Change your state of being

• Switch gears

• Create a space to move forward refreshed

What will help you facilitate a fresh start? Which ideas resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or making the most of this new year? I’d love to help! Virtual Organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.