For years, possibly decades, I spoke with my mom at least once a day. Over time, as her dementia worsened, the phone was no longer a viable way to communicate. I miss our conversations. Our calls frequently were about the people we loved and the time spent together. She’d say, “That’s the good stuff!”  She always communicated a deep sense of gratitude for her family, friends, music, art, and the preciousness of time. 

As the world begins to start, pause, and restart, so much uncertainty and distress exist. What life will look like a month or year from now is impossible to know. Yet, each day we forge forth with work, family, projects, and life. We move ahead despite the considerable uncertainty. It can feel exhausting, overwhelming, or scary. In your mix of doing, are you making time to notice and embrace the “good stuff?”

What is on your “good stuff” list? Here are some of mine:

• Waking up each morning

• Opening my eyes after meditating 

• Taking the first sip of coffee from my favorite mug

• Holding hands with my husband

• Hearing the sound of rain hitting the window panes

• Walking by the river

• Hugging my daughter, especially after being apart for six months

• Baking lemon blueberry muffins

• Picking herbs from my mini garden

• Capturing images of people, places, and nature with my camera

• Swimming in my friend’s pool

• Hearing birds sing

• Touching a very soft blanket

• Sitting quietly

• Biting into a big, juicy piece of watermelon

• Writing with my favorite pen

• Watching the leaves rustle in the breeze

• Having a conversation (phone, Zoom, or in-person) with a friend or loved one

• Relaxing in the hammock

• Eating a chocolate brownie Yasso pop

• Seeing my client experience an “ah-ha” moment during their virtual organizing session

• Writing in my journal

• Watching a good movie, or even a bad one

• Kayaking on any river

• Discovering new tomatoes growing on my cherry tomato plant

• Being still during the last ten minutes of yoga class

• Discovering vibrantly colored flowers

• Reading a good book

• Learning something new

• Getting into bed at the end of the day

“In your mix of doing, are you making time to notice and embrace the good stuff?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

Time is a gift. Some of our time will be spent navigating the daily doings of life. Included with responsibilities and commitments are also those things that make your heart sing. Or, as my mom would say, “the good stuff.” What is one thing you include on your list? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation!

Change can be challenging. We often want the result, yet we aren’t ready to do the necessary work. That work can involve rethinking beliefs or letting go of physical or emotional clutter. It’s incredible how quickly change can happen when you harness time, motivation, and opportunity. At home, I recently experienced the confluence of these forces. I was surprised and delighted by what transpired. I hope my discoveries will help you with the change you seek.

The story begins with some context. We had the joy of having our youngest daughter and husband-to-be here for her birthday, our anniversary, and Father’s Day weekend. Due to COVID-19, we hadn’t seen them in many months, and it was incredible to be physically present. My heart is still full. We all quarantined and minimized outside exposure pre-visit, have been healthy, and felt confident being together.

One of our conversations was about their upcoming fall wedding. It’s no surprise that due to the pandemic, they altered their plans. They will have a small virtual wedding hosted at our house. During our discussion about how to accommodate the social distancing concerns, we laid out chairs in our greenhouse, where the ceremony will be to visualize how this will work.

“It’s incredible how quickly change can happen when you harness time, motivation, and opportunity.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

A bit of background is helpful. Our greenhouse has been used for many things. It was a space to ride tricycles or do rainy day picnics when the girls were young. We used it for Cajun dance parties, a place to display the porcelain sign collection, and the bar location for holiday gatherings. It is a workspace for my husband’s woodworking machines and tools, a place to keep our Barber’s chairs, and, most recently, a room to actually grow plants. 

To allow proper social distancing in the greenhouse for the wedding guests, we needed more empty space. Approximately half of the room was filled with equipment, wood, and miscellaneous items that were no longer working or used. There were “someday” project supplies being stored too. Since Cassie and Matthew were over, they offered to help my husband, Steve, and move his equipment so we could increase the floor space for guests.

My husband is a talented man with many skills and hobbies. He’s also a collector of numerous things, including large equipment. And while he’s willing to let go, this isn’t easy for him. He enjoys collecting, and the Boy Scout in him likes to be prepared. Also, he has emotional attachments, as do I, to some things from the past. Believe me, I get it.

However, to my great surprise, during our discussions about moving “the stuff in the greenhouse,” it became clear that he was ready to let go of a few things. The decluttering began with one or two items and turned into his releasing a large quantity. So many things went. I placed ads on Craigslist and Facebook Marketplace for people to pick-up items for free. Within a few hours, most of the curbside piles were gone. 

The Confluence of Three Forces That Encourage Change

Time.

So why was Steve able to let go and allow this change to happen after almost two decades? It turns out that time helped him get ready. You can’t push people before they are willing. He recognized that the items that had been useful and relevant were not anymore. He felt happy and lighter when he let things go. We’re both still smiling. I am so proud of him for his willingness to ask some hard questions, make big decisions, and let go.

Motivation.

Steve was highly motivated because we needed more space for the upcoming wedding ceremony. Never underestimate the value of a compelling motivation such as a significant life event (i.e., wedding, divorce, job loss, move, new baby) to facilitate decision-making and change.

Opportunity.

Cassie and Matthew were physically here, which presented an opportunity to do the work. We weren’t expecting it, but they offered to help. They were non-judgmental and gracious about talking things through, supporting Steve with his decisions, and schlepping stuff to the curb. Thank you, Cassie and Matthew! We feel more wedding-ready.

Enjoy this 20-second time-lapse video Matthew took during a portion of the greenhouse clear out. The actual time we worked took many hours.

Has time, motivation, or opportunity influenced a change you’ve experienced? Are there ideas that resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation! 

Time is universal. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. Yet how we choose to use and feel about that time varies widely. You have scheduled and unscheduled time, hours spent doing what you enjoy and what you don’t. Your days can be intentional or haphazard, filled with obligations, commitments, fun, rest, and challenges.

Lately, I’ve noticed how many moments of joy and delight are present even in these uncertain times. With so much unrest and distress around us, why am I writing about happiness? Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.

The pandemic changed our daily lives. Opportunities to try new things emerged during the shift. Surprisingly, in this chaos, some beautiful moments emerged. I’ll share a few things I’ve recently experienced, hoping they will spark some ideas for you. 

5 Ways to Take Time for Delight

1. Watch Tomatoes Grow

Earlier this month, I created my first mini garden in our greenhouse. One of the vegetables I planted were cherry tomatoes. Each day I check to see how they’re doing. I water or mist them as needed. Little yellow flowers started blooming, which are magically becoming tomatoes-to-be. Right now, they are round, green balls that will hopefully turn bright red. It’s a simple thing, but it makes me smile with delight every time I check on their growth. It feels good to nurture them and watch the changes.

2. Cut Hair with Scissors

You’re probably thinking, how else would you cut hair? Of course, you use scissors (or a clipper!) The thing is I’ve never cut hair other than the disastrous time I cut my mother’s hair when I was 10 years old. My husband hasn’t been able to get his hair cut during the pandemic, so I offered to “try.” I was amazed that Steve trusted me to cut, especially since he knew about the mom incident. While I don’t plan on opening a salon, it turns out I’m not half bad at cutting hair. The great discovery is that I love doing it!  I feel giddy when I cut. It’s so satisfying to snip away, kind of like hair decluttering. I’ve learned one lesson. Don’t say, “Oops,” if you chop off more than you meant to.

“Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

3. Walk Socially Distant with Friend

It wasn’t that long ago we could walk where we wanted, with whoever we wanted, as closely as we wanted, and mask-free. But times have changed. The only walks I’ve taken in these past months have been by myself or with my husband. Since New York recently loosened the stay-in-place orders, I felt comfortable trying a socially distant (and masked) walk with one of my friends. While we have had regular Zoom calls during this time, we haven’t seen each other in person. It felt beyond fantastic to be physically close to my good friend as we walked, talked, and looked at one another. And while it was a bit weird not to be able to hug, it was so joyful to be actually rather than virtually together. 

4. Sit in Different Chairs

I’ve found ways to experiment with new perspectives with so much time at home these past months. It’s not that I was bored, but I felt like shifting things around to see what would happen. We added a few new chairs to our outdoor collection, so we moved furniture around to integrate the pieces. We placed chairs where they had never been before, which encouraged us to sit in new locations. The change was surprising because the new placements had different views and feel. Now when I go outside, instead of sitting in the exact same spot, I like to move around to try out other positions. Oddly, these simple changes make me feel similar to being on vacation because they both bring about perspective shifts. 

5. Take the Less Traveled Path

I love walking in the woods and by the rivers. There are regular and favorite walks I take, like down the block or the path along the Hudson River. But there are other places I walk less frequently like a park several towns south of where I live. Over the weekend, my husband and I decided to go to the park we rarely visit. There were many changes from the last time we went there. I loved noticing and appreciating the differences. Our prior visit was in early spring when the daffodils were blooming, and the leaves on the trees were starting to green. This time, yellow flowers were gone, and the trees were so full that some of the trunks were hidden. There were birds and butterflies all around. I loved exploring the less familiar path with spectacular river views.

Time keeps moving, whether we’re having good days or tough ones. There are ways to make time for joy-filled moments. I’d love to hear your thoughts. What moments delight you? I invite you to join the conversation.

There is laundry to wash, meals to make, people to check in on, and bills to pay. You have papers to sort, closets to organize, and schedules to coordinate. Your time is filled with the doings of daily life and so much more. You work, walk, run, and show up to support injustices. You reflect, create, converse, sleep, and reset. 

For this brief moment in time, my purpose is clear. Instead of doing or preparing for the next thing, I choose to be still instead of rushing ahead to another moment. In the quiet cocoon of my dark green hammock, stretched out between two 100-foot trees, I gently rock. 

The white clouds navigate decisively across the light blue sky. The gentle breeze shakes the leaves on the trees, which makes a swishing, rustling sound. The spring air is delightfully warm, and not too hot. The sunlight dances as it shows off the varied green hues in the woods. My breathing slows as I take in the deep earthy aroma of the forest.

At this moment in time, as the leaves rustle and birds sing, I sway side to side. The hammock’s movement encourages stillness within – just sense and notice. There will be time for doing and activating. But right here, right now, I am still. I slowly breathe in and exhale out.

“There will be time for doing and activating. But right here, right now, I am still.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

The landscape is wrapped in that sleepy, afternoon light. A rustle. A chirp. Clouds float across the sky. Feeling inadequate, knowing that I alone cannot heal this world filled with so much unrest, pain, anger, and sadness, I choose this one moment to just be. My pause is not forever. From this place of calm, I can reenergize. Learning, questioning, helping, and doing will come, but for this moment in time, I am still. 

What does quiet look like for you? Is it something that you need? Can you remember a time when your nervous system was calm? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.