You have arrived. The page has turned, and a new year has just begun. Do you feel the weight of last year? Are your thoughts occupied by unfinished projects or goals never reached?

Hi, friend. You are not alone. As much as you wanted to wrap up one year with a neat little bow, it wasn’t possible. You have leftovers and incompletes that are still in progress. I’m here with you.

Some things take longer or have deadlines that extend from one year to the next. While you want to move on and truly engage with a fresh start, you aren’t ready yet. However, I’ve got good news.

There is one small thing you can do to help change your energy in a positive direction during this transition time. It will lift that weight and reframe what a fresh start can be.

Reframe Your Fresh Start

Consider the “reset button,” which Glennon Doyle referred to in Untamed. Push that imaginary button to clear your mind and prepare for what’s next. This is especially useful when you feel stressed, anxious, stuck, in between, or pressured.

When you identify your preferred buttons, you can access them anytime to reset and start fresh. This viable strategy is not time-specific. You can use this simple practice today, tomorrow, or months from now.

What is the Reset Button?

As Doyle says, “My reset buttons are just little things.” Her list includes:

“Drink a glass of water.

Take a walk.

Take a bath.

Practice yoga.

Meditate.

Go to the beach and watch the waves.

Play with my dog.

Hug my wife and kids.

Hide the phone.”

As you read those, did you imagine the resets working for you? Did they spark other ‘button’ ideas?

I have most of Doyle’s buttons on my list, although I no longer have a dog to play with and prefer a hot cup of tea to a glass of water.

“My reset buttons are just little things.”

— Glennon Doyle

These additional resets also help me:

• Write in my journal.

• Talk with a friend.

• Run an errand.

• Have a snack.

• Make the bed.

• Clean the kitchen counters.

• Get a pedicure.

• Watch water flow.

• Wash and moisturize my face.

• Do something new or outside of my routine.

Your Fantastic Fresh Start

Release your worry and angst. Invite in patience and perseverance. Get out your button-pushing finger and get ready to press the reset. You can:

• Change your state of being

• Switch gears

• Create a space to move forward refreshed

What will help you facilitate a fresh start? Which ideas resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or making the most of this new year? I’d love to help! Virtual Organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.

The other day, I took an early evening walk along the Hudson River with my friend. Towards the end of our walk, the sun began to set and what I saw was incredible. The coolness of the light blue sky and deep blue water slowly shifted to warmer tones. As the round ball of sun lowered towards the horizon, its glow cast orange shimmers of light on the landscape. The visual change was magnificent. We sat on the rocks to take in the view.

If I had kept walking without looking or being mindful, I would have missed this spectacular moment. You might wonder, how is it possible to miss such a thing? It is.

You can walk but not notice what surrounds you. You can rush through your day getting stuff done but miss mindful moments of presence, joy, or calm. You can eat a meal but not savor the flavors and textures of your food. You can have a conversation but not listen to what the other person is saying. You can live in a cluttered environment but ignore how its heaviness is impacting you.

There are many ways not to be mindful. So often, we live on autopilot. We move from thing to thing without questioning, noticing, pausing, or enjoying. What becomes possible when we bring more mindfulness into our lives? A walk in nature with a friend becomes an opportunity to engage in a wonderful conversation while appreciating the changing scenery. A mindful meal creates a chance to slow down enough to taste the delicious flavors.

“There are many ways NOT to be mindful.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Have you found yourself rushing through life? What would a life with more pauses and mindful moments look and feel like? How would that change your perspective and experience? What is one thing you can do now to add more mindfulness to your day? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Having an array of emotions is part of being human. There are no good or bad ones. However, at times, our strong emotions can make clear thoughts challenging. In fact, some emotions like anxiety, sadness, or fear can cause procrastination or completely zap our motivation.

When the amygdala, the primitive, emotional region of the brain, becomes the boss, it creates a cycle that activates the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight.) The good news is many self-help strategies are available to help switch your internal gears from fight or flight to the rest and digest, parasympathetic nervous system mode.

When calmer, you can more readily access the pre-frontal cortex, a part of the brain that helps with decision-making, organization, attention, planning, emotional regulation, and impulse control. In this more relaxed state, you can reset and access the motivation to move forward.

Recently, I attended a meeting with fellow Nest Advisor, Monica Moore, a health and fertility coach. She led a workshop on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT.) The four-step process is helpful when making behavioral changes. ACT encourages working towards a value rather than avoiding something. In other words, focus your energy on something positive you want to be or do instead of on something negative you wish to avoid.

The ACT process:

1. Identify a value. Who or what do I want to be?

2. Identify feelings. What “yucky” feelings get in the way?

3. Identify relief valves. When you feel these things, what behaviors occur?

4. Create a nourishment menu. What behaviors will feel helpful, sustainable, and give perspective when experiencing the “yucky” feelings?

Your nourishment menu is where self-help strategies thrive. For example, when feeling anxious, you might engage in negative self-talk, binge-watching, or eating sugar-heavy snacks. What if you acknowledged and noticed those feelings when you felt anxious and instead, engaged in more helpful behaviors from the nourishment menu? Below are some suggestions. I’d love to know which of these or other ones work best for you.

20 Self-Help Strategies - Nourishment Menu

• Journal

• Meditate

• Take a walk

• Change your setting

• Organize or clean

• Create boundaries

• Breathe slowly

• Get a massage

• Hug a loved one for at least 20 seconds

• Run or exercise

• Watch leaves flutter

• Light a scented candle

• Use humor

• Rest

• Read

• Pet your dog or cat

• Listen to or play music

• Take a shower or bath

• Help someone else

• Talk with a friend, family member, or professional

I had a recent anxiety-inducing experience when I inadvertently deleted the most current 45 days of emails from my inbox. After long calls with tech support at Apple and Carbonite, it became clear that the emails might be retrieved, but not without many more hours spent with tech support and possibly worse complications.

A tech hiccup is never convenient. My plans to accomplish a lot that day were derailed because of the anxiety inability to focus. At a point, I decided to let it go and not retrieve the emails. However, I was still anxious and not functioning well. My emotions were in high gear, and my brain was foggy. So what did I do?

“Your ‘nourishment menu’ is where self-help strategies thrive.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

I grabbed my journal and wrote. As the inky pen glided along the smooth paper, my heart beat rapidly, and my stomach was in knots. I wrote about the ‘gone’ emails, my anxious feelings, the power they had to deactivate my motivation, the shift in my emotional state of feeling calmer as I wrote, and the choice to let this go and move on. I noticed my environment (birds chirping, trees swaying), took several deep breaths, and shifted gears to write about positive memories from the mini vacation we just had.

After journaling, I met a dear friend for a walk along the river. We talked, laughed, and I shared the email saga with her. Not knowing about the nourishment menu at the time, I realized after how I had used several of these strategies to calm my anxiety, let go, and reset.

What self-help strategies work for you when your strong emotions take over? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

What is one of the biggest obstacles that prevent you from making the changes you want? Our automatic negative thoughts, aka ANTS, can be a change blocker. They can damage your self-esteem, make you doubt your decisions, stop you from reaching your goals, or keep you stuck in a loop of negativity. What becomes possible when you transform negative energy and shift to a positive, growth-oriented mindset? How could that change benefit you?

Recently I was struggling with some personal ANTS. I discovered several strategies for working with and changing persistent negative self-talk. Shower yourself with love. In celebration of February, the love month, I encourage you to keep those warm Valentine’s Day feelings alive and extend some extra love and compassion to yourself.

As you consider these strategies I learned, I hope they will help you reframe the negativity and flourish.

5 Ways to Empower Change by Quieting Your Negative Self-Talk

During a weekly Executive Mom Nest coaching session, Leesa Askew, incredible colleague, Nest Advisor, and Transformational Coach, presented ideas about making your mindset an asset. To do that, she shared ways to “change the channel…change the programming.” Leesa learned these ANTS-busting strategies from Dr. Daniel Amen.

1. Write Affirmations

Create affirmations to counteract those ANTS. Write down three to five uplifting phrases you can repeat and keep in view. You can use your own words or find a favorite quote. This is one of Leesa’s personal favorites:

“I am always in the right place at the right time in the right state of mind.” 

If you feel stuck finding your words and want to try something fun, check out the interactive Affirmation Wheel my husband shared with me from Noom. When I clicked on the wheel, it coincidentally landed on this one:

“I have the power to create change.” 

How awesome is that? The next time doubt creeps in, I’ll have this affirmation ready to work its magic.

2.  Use Music

As Leesa said, music is a powerful force that “can stimulate the brain” and put you in a “subliminal trance.” She suggests creating a “Killing the ANTS Playlist.”  Which songs lift you up, bring a smile to your face, and shift your mood from crummy to happy? Music can completely alter how we feel. What songs will you include on your playlist? 

Here are several from mine:

• Respect – Aretha Franklin

• Happy – Pharrell Williams

• Better Together – Jack Johnson

• Stand By Me – Ben King

• Can’t Get What You Want – The Rolling Stones

• With A Little Help From My Friends – The Beatles

Pharrell Williams - Happy (video)

3. Get Physical

Interestingly, any type of physical activity can energize you and stop those negative thoughts from surfacing. Leesa shared how 25 jumping jacks can give you more energy than drinking two cups of coffee. Plus, physical movement has the added bonus of shifting your mindset to the positive. 

The next time your ANTS come marching in, stand up, get moving, and say bye-bye to the negativity. Take a brisk walk, go on a bike ride, dance around the house (using your new playlist, of course,) or do those 25 jumping jacks. You’ve got this!

“I have the power to create change.”

— Noom, Affirmation Wheel

Each week I receive Todd Henry’s 3 Things email, the “creative sparks to help you do better work.”  This week’s edition was well-timed because Todd included strategies for counteracting the negative “chatter” in your head. Hello, negative self-talk!

Todd referenced his podcast conversation with Dr. Ethan Kross, psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and author of Chatter – The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It.  I love these ideas Todd shared from the podcast with Dr. Kross, and I hope you do too.

4. Address Yourself

When negative self-talk takes over, “speak countering messages directly to yourself, and call yourself by name when you do it.” This is so powerful. If I rewrite my affirmation from number one above, it becomes,

“Linda, you have the power to create change.”

Coming in loudly and clearly. What message do you need to hear?

5. Welcome Growth

We often receive feedback, which may be unsolicited or not. When the comment isn’t favorable, doubt and negative self-talk can surface. I love this suggestion for redirecting that energy.

“Refuse to personalize critiques, but instead see them as an opportunity for growth.” 

Adopting the growth mindset is valuable in all situations. It shifts the focus from being defensive or thinking, ‘what’s wrong with me?’ to ‘what can I learn from this?’ 

Are there changes you’d like to pursue but find that ANTS create an obstacle? Which strategies resonate with you? Do you have other ways to counterbalance negative self-talk? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.