There is a precarious nature to balance. One minute you’re standing solidly on the ground, and the next, you’re on that slippery slope about to go down the ravine. Our footing can be compromised in a moment. As I stopped to take this photo at the edge of the wooded path looking down on the Croton River, I slipped on the wet rocks and leaves. Feeling like I was in slow motion, I lost my balance, falling onto my back and looking up at the canopy of leafless trees. My heart pounded as I gently stood up unharmed but realized it could have been so much worse.

Isn’t our life balance a bit like that too? We’re going along just fine, feet firmly planted on the ground, and then there is a slight shift. Sometimes it’s imperceptible. Maybe we’re no longer getting enough sleep, overeating sugar, not maintaining our organizing systems, or cramming too much into our schedule. Before you know it, our balance is off. We’re cranky, less energetic, overwhelmed, and surrounded by chaos. There we are on our backs wondering what the heck happened.

I was curious about the ways my colleagues navigate balance in their lives. So, I reached out to this generous group –  Janet Barclay, Jonda Beattie, Julie Bestry, Ellen Delap, Ronni Eisenberg, Christine Li, Diane Quintana, Sabrina Quairoli, Janet Schiesl, Yota Schneider, Geralin Thomas, and Seana Turner. I asked them to respond to and elaborate on this prompt-

If I had less (­­­­________), I’d feel more balanced.

Their responses describe internal and external shift strategies which are personal, insightful, and inspiring. My deepest gratitude goes out to them for sharing their hearts and wisdom with us.

Balance By Creating Internal Shifts

“If I had less of and didn’t succumb to old and familiar life triggers that, in an instant, throw me off, I would have more balance in my life. It’s those nagging triggers, like not being heard, that was learned so many years ago. It’s a sense of sensitivity whereby thoughts and emotions are redirected. They seem right there, always dangling in full view, so it’s not difficult to roll them in and react to them. Triggers can play a painful part in who we are. However, when I see one coming, and recognize it for what it is, and refuse to knuckle under, I feel so incredibly balanced and find strength in what is truly a wonderful place to be.”

Ronni Eisenberg – Professional Organizer, Teacher, Author, Blogger

“If I had less uncertainty, I’d feel more balanced. When I don’t know what is going to happen, I tend to feel out of control and often respond in ways that are not always healthy. Of course, I cannot eliminate uncertainty entirely. However, I can ‘control the controllables,’ such as planning my meals, establishing and following both a calendar and a to-do list, prepping all I need for the next day before I go to bed, etc. I’m also quick to seek help when I don’t know how to proceed.”

Seana Turner – Professional Organizer, Productivity Coach, Blogger

“If I had less time in my own head, I¹d feel more balanced. As a sentimental person, I spent a lot of time reminiscing about the past; as a solutions-oriented professional organizer, I am inclined to jump into thinking about end-results and what I want to have achieved when I look back on my life. I'm great at being mindful when I'm with clients but on my own? Not so much. While I am very lucky to have a more-than-equitable work-life balance, I suspect I'd have better overall life balance if I spent more time doing rather than reminiscing or planning what I should, should, should do in the future.”

Julie Bestry, CPO® - Certified Professional Organizer, Author

“If I had less need for control, I’d feel more balanced. I’m a firstborn, mostly type-A person. The desire to have everything work out right (read ‘the way I think it should’) keeps me spinning way too much of the time. Allowing plans and projects to go off my plan and just relax more and be in the moment would lead to more peace and balance in my life. I’m working on it.”

Jonda Beattie, M.Ed. – Organizer, Author, Presenter, Blogger

“If I had less small business industry emails, I’d feel more balanced. Those emails share what other people are doing and how they are succeeding. If this weren’t in my life, I would be less likely to compare myself to others.”

Sabrina M. Quairoli – Professional Organizer, Bookkeeper, Marketer

“Less business as usual; more willingness to pay attention to how I feel in the moment. Making myself a priority has always been difficult. That is why spending quiet time alone, meditating, reading, being outside in nature, even for a short walk, helps me recalibrate and feel grounded. After that, it’s up to me to trust what I know, look at what causes me to feel out of balance, and make adjustments. Along the way, I may falter, but every day is a new beginning and another opportunity to do better by myself.”

Yota Schneider – Life Coach, Retreat Facilitator, Blogger

“There is a precarious nature to balance.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Balance By Making External Shifts

“If I had fewer plates in the air, I'd feel more balanced. I am in the middle of a 3-day conference at the moment, and one of the takeaways that I have gotten is that one of my most important needs is ACCOMPLISHMENT.  I had never put a word to it before, so I felt that this was a useful thing for me to keep in mind. That is also why my response is ‘plates in the air,’ as this new realization has shown me that in the pursuit of accomplishment, I often am involved in more activities and pursuits than is actually good for me.  And I do love SIMPLICITY too, so I will be working on trimming my task list down a bit in 2022.”

Christine Li, Ph.D. – Procrastination Coach, Clinical Psychologist, Podcast Host of the Make Time for Success podcast

“If I had fewer virtual meetings, I’d feel more balanced. The pandemic has changed how we work. It’s so easy to jump on a virtual call. But you’ll waste time if your input is not necessary for that meeting. Keep your valued time guarded by checking the call agenda. See if the topics being discussed are relevant to you and ask to be dropped from the meeting (join late or leave early) if not. This will give you more time to get important work done. If you are the meeting leader, keep to the agenda to save everyone some time and find more balance.” 

Janet Schiesl, CPO® – Professional Organizer

“If I had less cake, I’d have a more balanced diet. Cake just happens to be one of my very favorite foods! I find it irresistible. I love the way cakes smell, feel, look, and taste. ‘Frosting, icing, or glazed’ you ask… I’ll answer: ‘Yes please!’ Sheet cakes. Bundt cakes. Cake pops. Tiered cakes. Layered cakes. Cupcakes. Cakes for birthdays, holidays, after school snacks, brunches, dinner parties, or afternoon tea. Flavor, size, shape matter not to me! Let ME eat cake!”

Geralin Thomas – Career Coach for Professional Organizers

“If I had less email to deal with, I’d feel more balanced. I've eliminated quite a bit by shutting down an account I no longer use and putting a stop to a lot of unwanted messages. But no matter how many lists I unsubscribe from, every time I buy something, I get added to another one.”

Janet Barclay, Certified Care Plans Specialist – Website Caregiver & Designer

“If I had less of a need to be a helper, I’d feel more balanced. Often as an Enneagram 2, I am motivated and find joy in being a helper who is generous in giving time to support our Kingwood, Texas community. Being a helper is a good thing in that I am connected to others and support those in need. It does keep me busier than I might like. I have strong ties to philanthropies and deep roots in my community. In 2022 I am limiting my commitment to local philanthropies to step back and be more in balance.”

Ellen R. Delap, CPO® - Certified Professional Organizer

“If I had less on my list of things to do, I’d feel more balanced. I have been working hard each day to accomplish everything for each of my businesses. I realize this is too much as I have been ignoring other aspects of my life. I always advise my clients to be realistic and to allow white space (unscheduled time) every day. I will be following my own advice in 2022. The past few days, I have been playing with my schedule to figure out how I can accomplish the things that are important to my business and allow me to have time for the things I have ignored. It all boils down to setting firm boundaries and remembering that ‘No’ is an answer.”

Diane N. Quintana, Master Trainer, CPO-CD®, CPO® – Professional Organizer, ADHD Specialist, Hoarding Specialist, Author

Finding balance, even when you’re feeling overwhelmed, is possible. With the creative ideas that my colleagues shared, you now have some new strategies to experiment with. Whether you choose to work on an internal or external shift, balance is possible for you. For me, when I’m off-balance, I ask the question, “What do you need right now, Linda?” That might be getting to sleep early, calling a friend, or getting some fresh air. These give me the reset I need to think more clearly and identify a tiny tweak or change I can make. 

Which ideas resonate with you? If you had less (_______) in your life, would you feel more balanced? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation!

Several weeks ago, one of my colleagues, Sara Skillen, wrote a post about the power of the words we use, which can be kind, harsh, energizing, or demotivating. Expressions influence our behavior and choices, so awareness is essential. Negative self-talk is common. It’s also damaging because the berating can hurt your self-esteem and prevent you from moving forward.

When working with my virtual organizing clients, I listen in various ways and pay close attention to their words.  One of the changes, which frequently happen during our sessions, is a positive mindset shift. As most sessions are only one hour, this change occurs quickly. It’s exciting to see.

At the start of a virtual organizing session, I check-in and ask, “How are you doing?” We review what transpired in between sessions, discuss discoveries or challenges, and clarify the session’s focus along with their starting thoughts. Fear is one of the common emotions that surface. We don’t ignore or dwell on the words. We let them reverberate, re-clarify what we’re working on, and take action steps forward with encouragement and focus. When fear and overwhelm are met with a small action step, movement happens, and a positive shift occurs.

“When fear and overwhelm are met with a small action step, movement happens, and a positive shift occurs.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Positive Change Clients Experience

This is a small sample of the types of changes my clients have experienced in less than an hour. Their actions were on projects such as organizing papers, clothing, schedules, memorabilia, books, and housewares. Movement enabled them to progress on their organizing goals and morph their negative thoughts into positive and hopeful ones.

“Dread” became “not overwhelmed.”

 “Distracted” became “I made headway.”

“Frazzled” became “I feel good.”

“Stomach in a knot” became “better than expected.”

“Frustrated” became “I’m feeling better.”

“Worst fears” became “not scary anymore.”

“Terrified” became “I can do this!”

Recognizing the agency we have over certain parts of our lives is liberating. Our choices, when paired with action, will help us overcome fear and overwhelm. By acknowledging our emotions, we have the opportunity to work with them to bring about positive change in our lives. 

Have you experienced a change in thought patterns because of actions you took? What helps you shift from negative self-talk to something more useful? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Opportunities for change appear in dramatic and mundane ways. However, it’s not always clear if it’s time to make a change, even when a cue presents itself. Maybe you’re not ready. Perhaps you aren’t aware of the hint. Or, you know something needs to shift, but you’re more comfortable with the familiar and are hesitant to pursue the unknown. Fear and anxiety can surface, which clouds objectivity and decision-making. 

Several weeks ago, I received an obvious change indicator. It couldn’t be any clearer. Did I boldly go for it and make the necessary change? Eventually, I did, but not without some angst. For iPhone users, this scenario will sound familiar. My phone started acting up. What happened? The icon on the home screen indicated the battery was 100% charged. Within minutes, the battery dropped to 10% and then shut off the phone. The first time it happened, I thought I misread the icon. After all, the symbol is tiny, and I have a hard time seeing it without my glasses. It happened four times and with increased frequency. Even though I wanted to pretend that it was nothing, I could not ignore the facts. My phone wasn’t working, and a change was inevitable.

Technology and our devices are great when they work. But when they don’t, it can be frustrating. At the height of my annoyance and awareness, I called Apple for their help. Within minutes, a calm, knowledgeable tech support person ran a diagnostic on my phone and quickly determined the problem. He said my “battery has reached its full lifespan.” Full lifespan? I thought that phrase sounded odd, so I asked for more clarification. He read back the report, which specifically stated my battery had “exceeded expected lifespan.”

How often is the choice for change that clear? Translated, “exceeded expected lifespan” meant it was time to move on, Linda, and get a new phone. I won’t go into the details of what happened next with my research, numerous conversations, sleepless nights, and the decision-making process. The vital part of this story isn’t about next, but about how we can notice and lean into change.

“Whether your change indicators are subtle or bold, they are waiting for you to discover them.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Without seeing an indicator, you won’t make a change. Once you are aware that change is necessary, the process begins. An internal switch gets flipped from being oblivious to aware. Awareness sets choices into motion, which bring about change.

As I said at the beginning, not all cues are as clear as my iPhone diagnostic revealed. How often do we get the message that something has “exceeded expected lifespan,” and it’s time to move on? Whether your change indicators are subtle or bold, they are waiting for you to discover them.

Have you noticed cues for change? What are they encouraging you to pursue? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation!

Time is universal. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. Yet how we choose to use and feel about that time varies widely. You have scheduled and unscheduled time, hours spent doing what you enjoy and what you don’t. Your days can be intentional or haphazard, filled with obligations, commitments, fun, rest, and challenges.

Lately, I’ve noticed how many moments of joy and delight are present even in these uncertain times. With so much unrest and distress around us, why am I writing about happiness? Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.

The pandemic changed our daily lives. Opportunities to try new things emerged during the shift. Surprisingly, in this chaos, some beautiful moments emerged. I’ll share a few things I’ve recently experienced, hoping they will spark some ideas for you. 

5 Ways to Take Time for Delight

1. Watch Tomatoes Grow

Earlier this month, I created my first mini garden in our greenhouse. One of the vegetables I planted were cherry tomatoes. Each day I check to see how they’re doing. I water or mist them as needed. Little yellow flowers started blooming, which are magically becoming tomatoes-to-be. Right now, they are round, green balls that will hopefully turn bright red. It’s a simple thing, but it makes me smile with delight every time I check on their growth. It feels good to nurture them and watch the changes.

2. Cut Hair with Scissors

You’re probably thinking, how else would you cut hair? Of course, you use scissors (or a clipper!) The thing is I’ve never cut hair other than the disastrous time I cut my mother’s hair when I was 10 years old. My husband hasn’t been able to get his hair cut during the pandemic, so I offered to “try.” I was amazed that Steve trusted me to cut, especially since he knew about the mom incident. While I don’t plan on opening a salon, it turns out I’m not half bad at cutting hair. The great discovery is that I love doing it!  I feel giddy when I cut. It’s so satisfying to snip away, kind of like hair decluttering. I’ve learned one lesson. Don’t say, “Oops,” if you chop off more than you meant to.

“Especially when life is hard, it’s essential to acknowledge and embrace moments that fill you with delight.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

3. Walk Socially Distant with Friend

It wasn’t that long ago we could walk where we wanted, with whoever we wanted, as closely as we wanted, and mask-free. But times have changed. The only walks I’ve taken in these past months have been by myself or with my husband. Since New York recently loosened the stay-in-place orders, I felt comfortable trying a socially distant (and masked) walk with one of my friends. While we have had regular Zoom calls during this time, we haven’t seen each other in person. It felt beyond fantastic to be physically close to my good friend as we walked, talked, and looked at one another. And while it was a bit weird not to be able to hug, it was so joyful to be actually rather than virtually together. 

4. Sit in Different Chairs

I’ve found ways to experiment with new perspectives with so much time at home these past months. It’s not that I was bored, but I felt like shifting things around to see what would happen. We added a few new chairs to our outdoor collection, so we moved furniture around to integrate the pieces. We placed chairs where they had never been before, which encouraged us to sit in new locations. The change was surprising because the new placements had different views and feel. Now when I go outside, instead of sitting in the exact same spot, I like to move around to try out other positions. Oddly, these simple changes make me feel similar to being on vacation because they both bring about perspective shifts. 

5. Take the Less Traveled Path

I love walking in the woods and by the rivers. There are regular and favorite walks I take, like down the block or the path along the Hudson River. But there are other places I walk less frequently like a park several towns south of where I live. Over the weekend, my husband and I decided to go to the park we rarely visit. There were many changes from the last time we went there. I loved noticing and appreciating the differences. Our prior visit was in early spring when the daffodils were blooming, and the leaves on the trees were starting to green. This time, yellow flowers were gone, and the trees were so full that some of the trunks were hidden. There were birds and butterflies all around. I loved exploring the less familiar path with spectacular river views.

Time keeps moving, whether we’re having good days or tough ones. There are ways to make time for joy-filled moments. I’d love to hear your thoughts. What moments delight you? I invite you to join the conversation.