Do you create obstacles for yourself before embarking on the next step? These might include a list of self-imposed pre-requirements before you can take the next step or tackle a new project.

Perhaps your goal is spring cleaning and organizing. While that’s a great goal, instead of beginning the process, you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step.

For instance, you prefer tackling this project in big time blocks rather than shorter, focused sessions. However, your life commitments and energy levels aren’t conducive to organizing three, four, or five hours at a time.

As a result, what happens? Things stagnate because you don’t have large swaths of time to move your project forward. You frontloaded the project with an obstacle that closed your mind to alternative solutions and experimentation.

Does this sound familiar?

What Are Toxic Preconditions?

A few weeks ago, I discovered the term “toxic preconditions” in Oliver Burkeman’s newsletter, The Imperfectionist. He learned this concept from James Horton, a social scientist who questioned why people who want to write more don’t.

Horton observed that some aspiring writers had “misguided beliefs” that might have seemed helpful but undermined their confidence, causing them to write less or not at all.

Burkeman says that what’s behind toxic preconditions is “the strong desire we have for some kind of guarantee – before we embark on a new activity, or even allow ourselves to relax into life – that it’ll all unfold safely and securely, that we’ll retain the feeling of being in control.”

He advocates how freeing it is to let go of that need for a “guarantee.” Burkeman says, “Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.” He goes on to say, “You never had control; all you had was anxiety.”

“Do you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Letting Go of Toxic Preconditions

There are three aspects for releasing toxic preconditions:

1. Observe – Notice when you are putting up obstacles to the extent that you can’t move toward your goal or next step.

2. Accept – Acknowledge there are no guarantees. Instead, move forward with curiosity, openness, and a willingness to experiment.

3. Release – Let go of any preconditions that are toxic. Be willing to take that next step without first doing a, b, c, d, or e. Go forth without all the i’s dotted and t’s crossed.

I want to re-establish my daily walking habit. In the past months, I put up obstacles based on the weather, which I can’t control. I won't walk every day if I’m only willing to walk when it’s warm and sunny. I’ve been telling myself, “It’s too cold.” Or, “It’s too dreary.” If, instead, I adjust the parameters, like the length of a walk, wearing more layers, or walking inside instead of out, I’ll be more likely to reach my daily walking goal.

“Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.”

— Oliver Burkeman

What’s On the Other Side of Toxicity?

Let’s face it. Life has challenges. However, how often do you create obstacles and make things more complicated than necessary? If you tend to hinder your progress, I encourage you to explore new options. Release those toxic preconditions that aren’t serving you. Experience more movement, flow, and success.

Have you encountered toxic preconditions in others or yourself? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, editing, planning, or working on that next step? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Figuring out next is possible, especially with support.

Several of the virtual organizing clients I’ve recently worked with were experiencing overwhelm due to their physical clutter. They wanted less stuff and clearer spaces, yet felt stuck with getting started and letting go. With support, desire for change, and sound strategies, they began moving forward. It was exciting to see their positive transformations. How was it possible? 

While each client and situation is unique, some strategies consistently help. Are you or someone you know is feeling clutter-stuck? If so, I encourage you to test these five strategies, which establish parameters for support, time, place, supplies, and decisions.

5 Strategies to Destroy the Clutter Barrier When You Are Overwhelmed 

1. Support

Especially if you have tried to let go of clutter on your own and haven’t made progress, it might be time to enlist help. What type of support do you need? Reach out to a nonjudgmental friend, family member, or professional organizer (like me) to help provide accountability, insight, a listening ear, and cheerleading. Having someone support you as you make decisions is invaluable. Finding the right support could be the missing parameter that will help you get unstuck.

2. Time

Clutter can feel overwhelming when we think too big. Typically when you are stuck, go small for your decluttering sessions. For the time parameter, instead of thinking, “I’m going to work all day until I declutter my entire closet,” only work for a short period. Experiment with organizing for 60 or 90 minutes, and then stop. Return another time to do more. Shorter sessions will be more manageable, be less likely to cause burn out, and keep you receptive to organizing again. Besides, a mini time block is easier to integrate into your schedule.

“For the time parameter, instead of thinking, ‘I’m going to work all day until I declutter my entire closet,’ only work for a short period.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®

3. Place

The parameter for going small also applies to the selection of your decluttering project. Let’s say you want to remove the clutter from your bathroom. You set your time parameter for one hour. Reduce the project scope to lessen your overwhelm. Instead of decluttering the entire bathroom in one session, think small. Work on decluttering one cabinet, one shelf, or one box. Keep the goal tiny. Set mini-goals in short time intervals. Repeat until you’ve completed the entire space.

4. Supplies

To help with your decluttering project, prepare the supply parameters. What will you need before you begin? Gather the basics such as trash, donate, and recycling bins or bags, masking tape, markers, and/or a label maker. A small pad and pen or your smartphone are useful to jot down ideas, replenish items, or note discoveries. If you are working virtually and using a video platform, it’s beneficial to have an adjustable stand to hold your mobile phone or tablet, so you can work hands-free, and your support person can see what you are working on.

5. Decisions

The final parameter relates to decision-making. Before you begin decluttering, establish some global project boundaries that will help expedite your choices. You want to set up parameters so that you don’t have to question every decision. Let’s say you’re decluttering your clothes, and you have a lot of everything. Before you begin, you might decide that you will only keep five pairs of black pants, two pairs of jeans, and no skirts (because you never wear them.) Or, you might decide that any stained shirts or torn clothes will go. All decisions will be based on the boundaries you establish at the onset. You can always alter or add to the parameters as you work. Decluttering involves many choices, and it can cause decision-fatigue. By building in a few letting-go rules upfront, you can minimize that stress.

When you are overwhelmed by clutter and are stuck, what helps you move forward? Do any of these strategies resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Matthew Hoffman, Artist

Are you ready to learn one of the best ways to facilitate letting go?

Parameters.

Set some boundaries or guidelines around your decision-making before you start the actual process of releasing things. Setting parameters in advance will allow you to move faster, decrease stress, and reduce decision fatigue.

Here's one way you might use this concept. Let’s say you have decades worth of health-related newsletters. Some you’ve read and others you haven’t. While you know there’s a lot of interesting information in those pages, the information isn’t current.

Instead of reading through every newsletter, you decide to activate a parameter. You choose that for any health newsletter over five years old, you'll recycle it immediately without looking through the pages. By setting this date parameter, you’ll save yourself hours of reading information that isn’t relevant. Instead, you can use your decision-making energy to make more important choices.

You can use the parameter concept for other areas, too. Let’s say your closet is overflowing. It’s a daily challenge to get dressed. There’s no space on the racks or shelves to move things around, so you can't see what’s there. You have an abundance of black pants and bulky sweaters, many of which you don't wear.

Instead of organizing the entire closet, you start with only those two categories. You opt to put some guidelines in place and decide that four pairs of black pants and six bulky sweaters are ‘enough.’ Now, it’s a matter of selecting your favorites. With your number parameters in place, letting go is more manageable.

It’s your turn to choose. Which parameters will make the letting go part of your organizing journey easier? Remember that the more parameters you establish in advance, the less decision fatigue you’ll experience, the faster you’ll reach your goals, and the less stress you’ll experience.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. What has your experience been with creating letting go parameters?