There are times when life goes sideways. The unthinkable happens, and you feel you have no control over anything. Your mood is dark, and hope is barely accessible. Cognitively, you understand there are no guarantees in life and that chaos is present. Yet, how do you cope? What can you do when nothing makes sense, and things feel out of control?

I don’t pretend to have the answers or know what you’re experiencing. I’m navigating this challenging time, too. Yet, I have a few strategies that are helping me, which might be helpful to you.

Instead of focusing on the areas you have no control over, shift your attention. Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.

5 Courageous Coping Strategies When Life Feels Out of Control

1. Supercharge Your Self-Care

Take care of yourself. During stressful times, you might ignore the basics. However, doing that makes you feel worse and less able to cope with challenges.

Recommit to self-care basics. Get enough sleep, hydrate, eat nutritiously, and move your body. Walking in nature has additional mood-boosting benefits.

Beyond essential self-care, consider getting a massage, manicure, or pedicure. Or how about taking a yoga, exercise, or meditation class?

Be kind to yourself and engage in intentional, mood-enhancing activities within your control.

“Recommit to self-care basics.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 2. Engage With Your Community

You might want to retreat when feeling out of sorts. However, I encourage you to do the opposite. Reach out to those who are also feeling ‘it.’ You’re not alone.

Your friends and family may be struggling, too. Connect with your loved ones. Pool your strengths while offering and receiving support.

3. Curate the Input

Scrolling social media, listening to the news, and fueling the fire may not be the healthiest choice. Cut yourself off (even if temporarily) when the external input you’re allowing adds to those out-of-control feelings.

Just as I encouraged you to eat nutritious foods to nourish your body, do something similar for your mind. Curate the input to minimize anxiety-producing thoughts and maximize ones with a more positive effect.

This could be a great time to read that new book or your favorite magazine from cover to cover. Or maybe you prefer to watch a comedy show or movie.

I’m not suggesting you ignore the outside world forever, but for this day, while building your resilience, choose to disengage with stress-inducing news. Control the input.

“Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Make Something

There is a gift in making something from nothing. What kind of something? Maybe you like to bake, write blog posts or in journals, take photographs, write poetry, or knit scarves. Perhaps you want to paint, write music, do a craft project, or create fancy cocktails.

Take control of a joy-inducing physical activity and make something. Enjoy the process and the result.

I’ve already journaled and worked on this post. Guess what else I did? I baked (and ate) some Almond Butter Chocolate Chip cookies. Fortunately, these cookies are not only delicious but also nutritious. I just have to remember to eat them in moderation. Wish me luck.

5. Declutter Your Space

Physical disorganization and chaos in your environment can affect how you feel and function. The disarray adds to a feeling of lack of control. You don’t know where things are or have the mind space to focus.

There is mood-boosting power in decluttering and organizing. The act of doing, making a change, and then experiencing the benefits of that shift is palpable.

You can’t control everything, but you can improve your corner of the world (or desk).

Human Coping Skills

Remember, you are resilient, and you have people to lean on. To help navigate challenging times, exert control in tiny yet significant ways. This won’t change everything, but it will help to calm and ground you. What coping strategies do you use when life feels chaotic?

If you need help decluttering, organizing, planning, or grounding, I’m here for you. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

What becomes possible when you get organized enough? Will you suffer less? Will your mental health and well-being improve due to better organization and flow?

For over 30 years, I have been a professional organizer, helping overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized.

I’ve observed a direct correlation between disorganization and distress. Creating order in the areas within your control significantly improves your external and internal state of being.

Recently, I had the joy of speaking with John Burton, a singer, songwriter, author, and host of the Home From Here podcast. John is fascinated by the intersection of organization and mental health, and he invited me to talk about that and much more on his show.

I invite you to listen to the podcast, episode 193, to hear the entire conversation. You might even discover a few surprising personal details, such as how I start my day, what my household was like growing up, and my favorite color. Although, I bet you can guess that last one even without listening to the podcast. You all know me so well.

Read about these three ideas I featured from our conversation about organization and well-being, and enjoy the podcast, too.

Home From Here - Episode 193 - John Burton with guest Linda Samuels

3 Ways Getting Organized Reduces Suffering and Improves Your Well-Being

1. “Organization made me feel better.”

John Burton, Home From Here podcast host with Linda Samuels - Episode 193

John noticed that organizing specific areas of his life made him feel better. You can learn more about his mental health journey from our conversation. One of the things he mentioned was how life-changing it was to organize his time and habits, especially his morning routine. As John experienced, better organization enhanced his day’s flow and well-being. He “felt better.”

Many of my clients have mental health challenges, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and OCD. The organizing piece has been elusive. Often, the external chaos reflects what’s happening internally. Through our work, I see a positive shift as we remove the disorganization blockages, create manageable systems, and focus on being “organized enough.” It’s not about perfection but about organizing in a way that helps you live with more ease.

What will be possible as you feel better?

2. “If I could only get it all done, life would be perfect.”

John asked me about the “trick” to time management. There are many different philosophies about managing yourself and your time, and there isn’t one definitive trick. However, I’ll share two significant principles of time management.

The first thing to understand about time management is acknowledging that you’ll never get it all done. And just so you know, I say those words as someone who is highly optimistic. People often think life would be perfect if you could “only get it all done.”

Whether your to-do list is in your head, on paper, or on an electronic list, as soon as you cross off a completed task, a new item appears. That’s the human condition. If you’re alive, you will have things to get done.

Even when your list is overflowing, I encourage you to embrace opportunities for joy and delight and let go of perfection. As John said, “If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

The second time management concept is about clarifying your priorities. Focus on aligning your priorities with what you spend time on. In addition, not all tasks will be related to things you’re passionate about. There are life management responsibilities like doing laundry, getting groceries, showering, or paying bills. Those might not excite you, but they are a necessary part of living.

Does all or most of your time go to life maintenance? Is little to no time reserved for your passions or priorities? If so, looking at where your time is going and making some adjustments is helpful.

What becomes possible when your priorities are clarified?

“If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

— John Burton

3. “I can see a path forward.”

John and I discussed virtual organizing and how I typically have 60-minute Zoom sessions with my clients. My goal is to help them get unstuck enough to take action, make progress, and feel better.

At the beginning of a session, clients might feel overwhelmed, discouraged, or hopeless. By the end of the hour, they’ve experienced progress (a physical change, perspective shift, or new system) and can see possibilities.

We take baby steps that boost confidence and agency. Progress happens during and between the organizing sessions. Clients learn organizational skills and how to integrate them into their busy lives.

 What will be possible as you clear your path?

What is Possible?

Toward the end of our conversation, John said he was “struck” by “the amount of reducing suffering” I’m doing.

Life has hiccups and stress. I am passionate about helping my clients get unstuck, make progress, live with more ease, and feel better. Getting organized enough, letting go of perfection, shifting perspectives, and focusing on priorities can make a significant difference. What is possible for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, organize, and improve your well-being? If so, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.

When you think about how you manage time, do you consider the “happy” factor? It’s a given that you have 24 hours each day. How you use and feel about that time is where life gets interesting. With some minor tweaks, you can enhance the quality of your life by shifting your perspective and actions.

Happiness is not always considered when it comes to time management, yet it’s a powerful element to integrate.

Before I share three helpful time management strategies, let’s look at some common phrases to describe time and how you experience it.

Common Time Phrases

This first list of expressions reflects stress, frustration, and anxiety about the limitations and passage of time. Some common sayings are:

• Running late

• Behind schedule

• On the clock

• Not enough hours in the day

• Time waits for no one

• Time is of the essence

• Lost time

• Pressed for time

• Time-sensitive

• Killing time

• Wasting time

• Running out of time

• Lost track of time

• Living on borrowed time

• Out of time

This second list of phrases describes positive feelings about time, highlighting enjoyment, appreciation, and making the most of every moment. These expressions include:

• Top priority

• High on the agenda

• Time flies when you’re having fun

• In the nick of time

• All in good time

• Perfect timing

• Ahead of time

• Time out

• Time to spare

• Right on time

• Prime time

• Good times

• Quality time

• Time well spent

• The time of your life

Which phrases resonate most with you? Do you often experience stressful time-related situations, as reflected in the first list? Are more of your time-related encounters positive, like the phrases on the second list? Or are your encounters with and relationship to time somewhere between the extremes?

3 Time Management Strategies for a Happier Life

The time strategies described below can increase your happiness wherever you are in your relationship with time.

1. Happier Boundaries

What happens when you have few or no boundaries? Without boundaries, everyone else’s priorities come first. And you know what that means? Yours come last, if at all. You end up saying “yes” to things you wish you said “no” to. As a result, you might feel resentful, angry, frustrated, or annoyed.

Learning to set boundaries is a core time management skill. I continually work on boundary-setting because I didn’t understand that skill growing up. On the contrary, I learned how NOT to set boundaries. But I digress.

My insightful friend, colleague, and Professional Organizer Julie Bestry always shares excellent resources on her Paper Doll blog. She also has a great sense of humor. Her recent post, “52 Ways to Say NO to a Request So You Can Say YES to Your Priorities,” includes fabulous boundary-setting strategies.

To illustrate one of Julie’s points, she shares a 30-second YouTube clip from the TV show Friends. In the segment, Joey asks Phoebe if she wants to help assemble Ross’s furniture. Phoebe matter-of-factly says, “I wish I could, but I don’t want to.” Wow! What a clear (and hilarious) example of setting boundaries and saying no.

While Phoebe’s response to Joey’s request might not work for you, the idea behind it is worth considering. There are many ways to set boundaries, and learning to say no when you want to (whatever the reason) is essential. Knowing that skill lets you focus on your top priorities and what matters most.   

“Learning to set boundaries is a core time management skill.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. Happier Activation

Now that you excel at boundary setting (yes, you!), your attention can focus on your most important people, projects, and tasks. However, while you cleared your schedule and said no to several requests, you’re having difficulty beginning your work.

The project you want to do, you can’t make progress on. You might need to plan, research, enlist help, gather resources, or take other actions. You’re thinking about how much time it will take to finish. Feelings of overwhelm are taking over. It all feels too big. How are you going to complete this or get started?

Let’s say it. You can’t do it all at once, so don’t expect that you will. Instead, let small time blocks be your ‘activation’ friend. Merge the concept of small blocks of time with an actual timer, and you’ll be amazed at what you can accomplish.

Activation Strategy:

• Review your calendar

• Select a day that has availability

• Select a small amount of time, such as 10, 20, or 30 minutes you commit to your project

• Set the timer for those minutes

• Work until the buzzer dings

• Stop working

• Check on how you’re doing – Are you done for the day? If so, schedule another day to repeat the process. Or do you want to work for another ‘x’ number of minutes? If so, reset your timer now to continue working. When the buzzer dings, repeat the last two steps.

During the past month, I’ve been preparing my latest workshop, How to Let That Sh*t Go. The small blocks of time strategy helped me progress and prepare to lead the workshop on June 6th. If you or someone you know wants to learn more or register, click here: https://www.ohsoorganized.com/workshops.

You will feel happier attending to what’s most important and meaningful. However, progress will not happen without the ability to activate. When you use small blocks of time effectively, you’ll handle things high on your agenda.

“Let small time blocks be your ‘activation’ friend.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 3. Happier Connections

Pausing in your day to savor one of life’s simple pleasures is an excellent time management strategy to enhance your happiness. If you are constantly on the go, consider integrating “Fika,” a Swedish practice.

Fika embodies the Swedish values of work-life balance, social interaction, and relaxation. Practicing Fika involves taking a short break, typically in the afternoon. People slow down, socialize, and build relationships. The break often includes coffee or another beverage and a small treat like pastries, cookies, or sandwiches.

The other day, I tried a variation of this with my husband. We skipped the beverage part and visited our local store, The Blue Pig. We sat, talked, and ate espresso chip ice cream cones with chocolate sprinkles. It was time well spent.

Which time management strategies bring you the most happiness? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you feel time-challenged, reach out to Linda, me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. A life focused on what matters most is possible, especially with support.

When you think about clutter, do you consider how it makes you feel? In the thirty-plus years I’ve been a Professional Organizer, I’ve seen first-hand the array of emotions and effects of clutter on individuals, families, relationships, households, work, and other environments.

Clutter can keep you stuck, and releasing it can have positive, long-lasting effects on your life. One of my clients shared unique insights about the effect clutter has on her. You’ll learn more about it soon. Before diving deeper into her discoveries, let’s look at how clutter can negatively or positively affect you.

NEGATIVE EFFECTS Clutter Can Cause:

• Overwhelm

• Depression

• Anxiety

• Stress

• Paralysis

• Frustration

• Procrastination

• Low self-esteem

• Guilt

• Sense of hopelessness

Positive Effects Reduction of Clutter Can Foster:

• Energy

• Motivation

• Calm

• Creativity

• Relief

• Satisfaction

• Confidence

• Growth

• Hope

• Harmony

• Happiness

One Client’s Experience of Clutter

As mentioned above, one of my clients recently shared her profound clutter experience with me during a virtual organizing session. She gave me permission to share it with you. She said,

“Clutter creates chronic inflammation.”

I asked her to tell me more about her perspective on clutter. She elaborated and described how . . .

• Chronic inflammation is a physical unpleasantness.

• It feels like an embodied experience.

• It’s physiological.

• A cluttered environment makes her feel agitated and angry.

• Any action taken to clear surfaces in her visual field reduces chronic inflammation.

• Even tiny decluttering acts immediately solve chronic inflammation.

My client’s description of chronic inflammation caused by clutter describes the physiological connection clutter can have. While the term chronic inflammation was new to me, I’ve often heard clients describe the weightiness of clutter. They explain when clutter is released, it feels like “a weight has been lifted.” This is another example of the potential physiological and psychological effects clutter can have.

Do you know someone who has experienced clutter this way? What feelings and sensations arose?

“Clutter creates chronic inflammation.”

— Oh, So Organized! Client

How Clutter Feels – A Podcast

Last week, I wrote about clutter’s impact on mental health and well-being. I included links to the interviews by journalist and podcast host Melissa Tracey, who featured me in a Houselogic article and her Housing Muse podcast.

During the podcast, we discussed the relationship between home clutter and its effect on mental health. You can listen below to episode 50: You’ll Never Look at Your Home’s Clutter the Same.

How does clutter make you feel? When you release clutter, what changes do you notice? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you are struggling with the weight of clutter, enlist help. Reach out and email me, Linda, at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. A clutter-free life is possible, especially with support.