Do you create obstacles for yourself before embarking on the next step? These might include a list of self-imposed pre-requirements before you can take the next step or tackle a new project.

Perhaps your goal is spring cleaning and organizing. While that’s a great goal, instead of beginning the process, you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step.

For instance, you prefer tackling this project in big time blocks rather than shorter, focused sessions. However, your life commitments and energy levels aren’t conducive to organizing three, four, or five hours at a time.

As a result, what happens? Things stagnate because you don’t have large swaths of time to move your project forward. You frontloaded the project with an obstacle that closed your mind to alternative solutions and experimentation.

Does this sound familiar?

What Are Toxic Preconditions?

A few weeks ago, I discovered the term “toxic preconditions” in Oliver Burkeman’s newsletter, The Imperfectionist. He learned this concept from James Horton, a social scientist who questioned why people who want to write more don’t.

Horton observed that some aspiring writers had “misguided beliefs” that might have seemed helpful but undermined their confidence, causing them to write less or not at all.

Burkeman says that what’s behind toxic preconditions is “the strong desire we have for some kind of guarantee – before we embark on a new activity, or even allow ourselves to relax into life – that it’ll all unfold safely and securely, that we’ll retain the feeling of being in control.”

He advocates how freeing it is to let go of that need for a “guarantee.” Burkeman says, “Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.” He goes on to say, “You never had control; all you had was anxiety.”

“Do you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Letting Go of Toxic Preconditions

There are three aspects for releasing toxic preconditions:

1. Observe – Notice when you are putting up obstacles to the extent that you can’t move toward your goal or next step.

2. Accept – Acknowledge there are no guarantees. Instead, move forward with curiosity, openness, and a willingness to experiment.

3. Release – Let go of any preconditions that are toxic. Be willing to take that next step without first doing a, b, c, d, or e. Go forth without all the i’s dotted and t’s crossed.

I want to re-establish my daily walking habit. In the past months, I put up obstacles based on the weather, which I can’t control. I won't walk every day if I’m only willing to walk when it’s warm and sunny. I’ve been telling myself, “It’s too cold.” Or, “It’s too dreary.” If, instead, I adjust the parameters, like the length of a walk, wearing more layers, or walking inside instead of out, I’ll be more likely to reach my daily walking goal.

“Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.”

— Oliver Burkeman

What’s On the Other Side of Toxicity?

Let’s face it. Life has challenges. However, how often do you create obstacles and make things more complicated than necessary? If you tend to hinder your progress, I encourage you to explore new options. Release those toxic preconditions that aren’t serving you. Experience more movement, flow, and success.

Have you encountered toxic preconditions in others or yourself? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, editing, planning, or working on that next step? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Figuring out next is possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling exhausted after meeting a deadline or finishing a project? While hyper-drive may be necessary to reach completion, downshifting is essential afterward.

Over the past month, I worked hard on the chapter I wrote for the new ICD (Institute for Challenging Disorganization) book to meet their short, time-sensitive deadline. I am excited to have written the chapter on client support and look forward to sharing more once it is published later this year.

How does this relate to fresh starts? The writing deadline straddled the end of one year and the beginning of another. The time I typically take to wrap things up and reimagine what’s next was allocated to the book project. Instead of slowing down as the year closed, things sped up and kept going until earlier this week when I submitted my draft.

Completing the deadline helped reaffirm the necessity of taking a moment to breathe. This slow exhalation is the break I need to refocus my energy and plan what comes next. I identified several elements that I hope you’ll find helpful the next time you are about to switch gears.

3 Ways to Exhale & Refocus Your Energy

1. Reflect

Doing a post-deadline debrief, thinking about how I approached the book project and what I learned, was valuable and affirming.

These are some reflections:

• Clarified the chapter’s content and description with the committee

• Made time estimates for how long it would take to write the chapter

• Scheduled writing blocks on my calendar

• Said “no” to things that would distract from my objectives

• Remained flexible with scheduling and idea development

• Developed an outline of topics to cover

• Made a plan for how to approach the various sections

• Hired an accountability partner (thank you, Lana) to keep me on track

• Set weekly goals

• Logged hours and other metrics

• Journaled

Another aspect I noticed was how my weekly blog writing routine prepared me for this project. My well-established writing tools and rituals made writing easier during the scheduled “ICD Book Project” writing blocks. When things didn’t go well during a particular block, I wasn’t discouraged, as I knew it was a normal part of the writing. I had built up resiliency through experiencing similar ups and downs with blogging.

Hiring an accountability partner was incredibly beneficial for the book project, especially because of the tight deadline. It was also fascinating to experience and fully appreciate the benefits from the “lived” perspective. While I have received a lot of positive feedback from my clients, I better understand why they say having me as their accountability partner is helpful. I get it.

2. Sense

I just finished reading a wonderful book How to Winter, by Kari Leibowitz, PhD. I highly recommend it, especially if you’re interested in the far-reaching benefits of developing a “positive wintertime mindset.”

One of the things that she wrote about was how to develop an awareness of those things you love about winter, like:

• the “fresh” smell of the air that slow-moving molecules create

• the cozy warmth of being around a firepit

• the delight of sipping hot cocoa with marshmallows or

• the happy sensation of curling up with a warm blanket and book

While I engage regularly with my senses, I noticed how they were heightened during this transition time because I was reading Leibowitz’s book. When I was outside, instead of thinking about how cold I was, I breathed in the crisp air and appreciated the cyclical nature of the dormant, bare trees. Instead of feeling guilty for wanting to go to bed earlier, I recognized the value of rest and delighted in the visceral calming effects of my bedtime rituals.

Appreciating and sensing is a gentle way to experience presence and gratitude for what is here now. Lingering in this presence through my senses removes concern about what will be next and helps replenish my energy.

Of all things, as if on cue, the snow just started falling. At first, the flakes were sparse and descended slowly. Then, the flow and pace increased as the sky and landscape turned white. We’re expecting five to seven inches of snow over the following hours. I’m so excited! Perhaps there will be some hot cocoa in my future. A white covering will soon transform everything. Talk about a clean slate! It’s the perfect visual to encourage a fresh start.

“While hyper-drive may be necessary to reach completion, downshifting is essential afterward.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

3. Nourish

Engaging in nourishing activities that support your well-being is another way to slow down and refocus your energy. When you have exerted a lot of effort, balancing it with restorative practices is vital.

My supportive activities include meditation, yoga, walking, and journaling. There are others, too, like exploring new places, seeing friends and family, watching movies, eating healthfully, or getting enough sleep.

And then there’s soup—yes, soup! Making and eating soup is a thoroughly enriching activity for me. I love washing and chopping ingredients, adding them to the big pot, and creating a delicious meal with a few simple, fresh items.

After hours of simmering, my husband and I will share this hot meal as we look out the dining room window into the chilly night, watching the snow gently fall. Maybe we’ll even eat by candlelight. If that’s not cozy and nourishing, I don’t know what is.

What helps you slow down and restore energy? How can taking a restorative break energize your fresh start? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or restoring energy? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling the fast whoosh of time passing with the holiday season arriving, the elections looming, and the year ending? It’s a lot to take in. You may feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you’re thinking about what goals you wanted to accomplish this year, the time left to do it, and what is actually possible.

Maybe your thoughts are occupied with ‘regular’ life maintenance to-dos plus hundreds of holiday-related tasks, including gift shopping, holiday meal prepping, guestroom readying, travel planning, and family and friends’ gatherings.

Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.

I often say that life is in the joyful doing and presence of the moment. And while that’s all well and good, when you’re stressed and overwhelmed, accessing that presence can be more challenging.

With so much going on with work and family, externally and internally, this time of year, making tiny adjustments is helpful. Infusing compassion and mindfulness into your thoughts and actions will encourage a more joyful, fulfilling, and happier holiday season.

I offer you a thought, question, and strategy to help.

3 Ways to Prepare for a Compassionate Holiday Season

1. One Thought: “We don’t have to be perfect.”

Let’s remove the idea of perfection from the holiday season. Why impose more pressure, stress, or unrealistic expectations on yourself or others?

Try channeling your perfectionism energy differently. Focus your energy on one of these options instead:

• Excellence

• Personal best

• Good enough

• Progress

• Ease

• Done

As the Noom app said about overcoming thought distortions, “…it’s about recognizing that we don’t have to be perfect. We’re human.”

Which reframe of perfectionism (one suggested or something else) is helpful for you?

“Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. One Question: “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

One of my favorite recent discoveries is James Clear’s weekly 3-2-1 email, which my client told me about. The idea he wrote about last month feels relevant and worth sharing.

Clear wrote, “Forget about the outcome and focus on what precedes it.” He asks, “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

Consider Clear’s question in the context of which actions and thoughts you can focus on to create a joyful, compassion-filled holiday season. They might include:

• Planning

• Lowering your expectations

• Creating boundaries

• Simplifying goals and tasks

• Decluttering

• Scheduling rest and renewal time

What will you choose to focus on to create a positive holiday season?

“We don’t have to be perfect.”

— James Clear

3. One Strategy: “Accept help.”

Do you tend to do everything yourself? Perhaps you don’t want to impose on others. Or, Seth Godin suggests you might think, “Doing the tasks is more efficient than coordinating the help.” Either philosophy results in you doing all the work, which can lead to resentment and exhaustion. Neither of those is a recipe for happy holidays.

Whatever the season, enlisting and accepting help improves your life. We’re human and benefit from the support and interactions with others. What type of help will benefit your life and infuse more ease? Who can you ask for help? How will that change your experience? If you’re having guests over and they offer to help, lean in and say “Yes.” Have tasks ready to delegate. It will make them feel comfortable and reduce pressure from your list.

Godin says, “It’s much more productive to accept help. When we have a project, part of the work is to enlist others in figuring out how to make the change we seek.”

Let me know if you’re stressed and need a thought partner, decluttering and organizing guide, planning help, or accountability buddy. In my virtual organizing sessions, I offer one-hour focused sessions, ongoing support, and personalized guidance to help you with your goals and challenges. I’m available and am ready to help.

Human Holiday

Do you know the 1953 movie Roman Holiday, starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck? This season, I encourage you to embody a Human Holiday.

• Let go of what you can.

• Invite in what you want.

• Enlist the help you need.

For a less stressful and happier holiday season and beyond, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Inspiration abounds. The fall season in the northeast profoundly influences my thoughts about possibilities. Seeing the bold color shift to saturated yellows, oranges, and reds encourages me to seek change.

Last week, I wrote about my guest bedroom makeover. I considered what was possible, turned those ideas into reality, and was motivated to make more changes.

I made additional unplanned tweaks and changes that were outgrowths influenced by the bedroom project. When you disrupt an area, physical space, and objects are moved. This spatial churning also affects thoughts. Undoing what was in one room opened my mind to seeing and experimenting in other areas.

Sometimes, you feel set and don’t have the need or desire to change anything. Those times can last for brief periods, months, or years. At a point, though, something will interrupt that state. You are ready to try something different, reorganize systems, or make significant life shifts.

Possibilities infiltrate your thoughts. When possibilities are paired with action, change occurs.

3 Unexpected Outcomes from Possibility Thinking

1. Discover Giddy, Joyful Ease

I’ll admit this openly: I love decorative pillows. They’re textural and colorful and instantly change the look of a room. Typically, I have no less than five pillows adorning the sofa or beds.

As you might imagine, keeping the pillows fluffed and arranged can be a pain. Plus, you need extra time to undo and make the beds—pillows off, pillows on. However, I was happy to do the pillow maintenance dance because I loved how they looked and felt. I was willing until recently.

When I transformed the guest bedroom, I rethought the decorative pillow arrangement on that bed. That encouraged me to reconsider the pillow situation in our bedroom. I’m almost embarrassed to say, but we had ten pillows, only two of which we used for sleep. As I write this, I’m laughing out loud. I never counted them up before. Ten pillows are ridiculous.

My supportive husband has always accepted my pillow obsession but recently started questioning their necessity. Between his input and my desire to reimagine other areas of our home, I felt emboldened to change things.

Our bed now has only four sleep pillows and one decorative pillow. I feel giddy, even joyful, when I undo the bed at night or make it in the morning. It’s so easy that it almost feels wrong. I love it!

It took a change in one room to open my mind to possibilities in other areas. The wheels continue to turn.

“When you release what is unnecessary, you clear the path for possibilities.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. Create Organization and Accessibility

One of the most fabulous products I discovered during the bedroom renovation was the Elfa® drawer dividers. We redid the guest bedroom closet with an Elfa® system from The Container Store. The designer suggested using the drawer dividers. I loved them so much that I purchased more for other areas where I have Elfa® drawers.

I showcased them in the tea bag overflow drawer a few weeks ago. Since then, I decided to reorganize the gift wrap supply drawers using the dividers. Instead of the gift bags, tags, ribbons, and other supplies moving around each time I opened a drawer, the dividers keep items better organized and securely in place.

Since the drawer organization upgrade, I’ve wrapped a few gifts. It was so easy and fun! The supplies are more visible, accessible, and visually pleasing.

Enjoy this fun video, which demonstrates how easy the drawer dividers are to install.

3. Right-Size Your Stuff

I often discuss how letting go of things that have overstayed their welcome makes space for more of what you want in your life. Clutter or extra stuff you never use takes up physical and emotional space. When you release what is unnecessary, you clear the path for possibilities.

When we emptied the guest bedroom, it gave me pause to assess the removed items and make decisions about their future. I did ‘the edit’ and engaged in various questions to help me evaluate what to keep or let go. I asked letting go questions, including:

• Does this fit or belong in the newly reimagined space?

• Will I use it?

• Do I still like it?

• Could it go somewhere else?

• Is it time to let it go?

• Has it served its purpose and is no longer necessary?

I made decisions. Cardboard storage boxes were recycled and replaced with new containers. Some furniture, art, home goods, boxes, and decorative pillows (yes, those!) will be sold or donated.

Currently, I still have a pile of items waiting to be gone. Getting them out requires my time and attention. Using Facebook Marketplace, GreenDrop, or the Buy Nothing Group, things will exit. I am confident in my decisions and ready to release things.

This process began with thinking about possibilities in one space and resulted in letting go of things that are no longer needed. It feels good and will feel even better when the pile is gone.

What Possibilities Are Ahead?

What no longer works for you? What becomes possible with a slight tweak? What possibility will inspire more organization and ease into your life? How can letting go create a path for new opportunities? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to move forward, get organized, and live with more ease? If so, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.