Posts tagged learning
How to Joyfully Grow and Thrive When Life Feels Like Complete Chaos

When the world within and around you is drenched in chaos, how can you thrive? Humans are complicated beings. We can simultaneously hold profoundly opposite ideas, emotions, and thoughts. We can experience love and safety when wrapped in our loved one’s embrace. We can also experience intense pain when we hear news about wars, hate, displacement, and heartache. The hard stuff can weigh so heavily on you that it can feel impossible to thrive. You might even feel guilty about experiencing joy when there is so much suffering.

Several years ago, I listened to a conversation about opening and cultivating the human heart with Frank Ostaseki, co-founder of The Zen Hospice Project, and Roshi Joan Halifax, Ph.D., Buddhist teacher and Founder of Upaya Zen Center. One of the ideas that resonated with me then and even more now is that hope is essential, especially in a “time of radical uncertainty.” Hope is not about “sappy positivity,” bypassing the truth of suffering, or thinking that everything will be OK.

 

Thoughts About Hope

During the conversation, Ostaseki and Halifax shared their perspectives about hope:

  • Hope helps us go beyond the rational.

  • Hope can be the flip side of fear.

  • Hope is not based on optimism.

  • Hope is a surprise. It’s light and buoyant and not about a particular outcome.

  • Hope reflects an understanding that what we do matters, even though we don’t know how, why, who it will touch, or what will unfold from our actions.

  • Hope is resistant to futility.

  • Hope resides in resourcefulness.

  • Hope speaks to possibilities.

While you might feel powerless to change the world, you can make your corner more joyous and hope-filled.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

31 Ways to Thrive and Feel Joyful During Chaotic Times

Having hope contributes to being able to thrive. Without it, we give up. Take an active role in cultivating hope. Nourish yourself and others, and create a solid base to grow from. During chaotic times, there are so many things that seem futile. Instead, focus on engaging in simple actions or observations in your control. Hope will grow from there. Consider:

  • Watching the fall leaves gently float to the ground

  • Taking a walk along the river with a good friend

  • Getting a good night’s sleep

  • Eating a nutritious and delicious meal

  • Feeling the warm sun on your face

  • Hugging your loved ones

  • Reading or listening to uplifting books, articles, and podcasts

  • Planning something you will look forward to doing

  • Taking a road trip, even a local one

  • Brewing and slowly sipping a hot cup of tea

  • Curling up on the sofa, wrapped in your favorite soft, cozy blanket

  • Learning something new

  • Listening to your favorite music

  • Practicing mindfulness meditation

  • Organizing that one room that is ready to be tamed

  • Helping something to grow

  • Focusing on the inhale and exhale of your breath

  • Making something with your hands

  • Pausing in the middle of your day to regroup and reset

  • Listening to the sounds of laughter

  • Laughing

  • Writing in your journal

  • Smiling at a stranger

  • Having a ‘do nothing’ day

  • Checking in by phone, email, text, or in person on your loved ones

  • Doing something outside of your comfort zone

  • Helping a client set boundaries, establish priorities, and get unstuck

  • Noting what you are grateful for

  • Offering compassion and kindness to someone you do or don’t know

  • Refusing to give up

  • Listening to your intuition


Life is a mixture of joy, pain, and everything in between. As humans, we know this is true. Yet even so, it can be challenging to navigate the sadness when your life and the world feel so chaotic and unhinged. While you might feel powerless to change the world, you can make your corner more joyous and hope-filled. You never know how your actions or words will uplift someone else. Be gentle with yourself and others. Nourish your being to have the energy to extend more kindness and compassion to yourself and others.

What helps you thrive during challenging times? What brings you hope? How do you make your ‘corner’ better? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

 
One Absolutely Effective Time Crafting Strategy to Bring You Clarity

Do you know Jonathan Larson’s iconic “Seasons of Love” song from the musical “Rent”? It begins with “five-hundred, twenty-five thousand, six-hundred minutes,” the number of minutes a year. He asks, “How do you measure, measure a year?” Jonathan continues with questions about how to measure a year in the life and the life of a woman or a man. Every time I hear it, this beautiful ballad reminds me of how precious time is. It brings me to tears.

Our time is limited, so what we choose to do with it and how we acknowledge and appreciate it matters.

In Happier Hour, Cassie Holmes shares several “time crafting strategies” which encourage focusing on positive experiences. She proposes that making time to do this will bring you more clarity, satisfaction, and happiness.

One strategy she learned from her friend who practices it with her kids on their car rides home from school. I encourage you to try it with your kids, partner, friends, or colleagues. You can also do this as a solo practice. I slightly modified the concept for our purpose and am sharing the three-part practice with you.

 

Effective Time Crafting Strategy

1. The Rose – Something Good

Share something good that happened. This immediately focuses your thoughts on the positive and encourages gratitude for the time you are in now.

 

2. The Thorn – Something Bad

Share something crummy that happened. This helps develop problem-solving skills and acknowledges that life isn’t only rosey. Challenges are part of life.

 

3. The Bud – Something Exciting

Share something you are excited about. While it’s terrific to be mindful and in the present moment, looking to the future with happy anticipation extends your joy quotient and enhances your time.

 

Time passes in the blink of an eye.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Here is an example of my rose, thorn, and bud.

  • Rose – I had a productive virtual organizing session with a new client and loved helping her accomplish her session goal.

  • Thorn – I couldn’t make it through the yoga class because I wasn’t feeling well.

  • Bud – I’m so excited we’re going to Turks & Caicos to celebrate our 40th Anniversary!

 

Time passes in the blink of an eye. Acknowledging what you are grateful for and learning from the challenges can enhance and bring clarity to your days.

Are you making time to reflect? What are your rose, thorn, and bud? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

 

Seasons of Love - RENT (2008 Broadway Cast)

 
Here Are Today's Interesting and Best Change-Related Discoveries - v39

The newest release (v39) of the “What’s Interesting?” feature has my latest finds, which inform, educate, and relate to organizing and life balance. These unique, inspiring, embracing change discoveries reflect this month’s blog theme.

You are a generous, communicative, and engaged group. I am deeply grateful for your ongoing presence, positive energy, and contributions to this community. I look forward to your participation and additions to the collection I’ve sourced.

What do you find interesting?

 









What’s Interesting? – 5 Best Embracing Change Discoveries

1. Interesting Read – Life Change

Do you want more happiness in your life? In The Fun Habit – How the Pursuit of Joy and Wonder Can Change Your Life, behavioral scientist, organizational psychologist, and author Mike Rucker, Ph.D., shares how happiness is a state of mind which can feel elusive and dependent upon your circumstance. Yet fun is action-oriented and something within your control. He says, “In contrast to happiness, I’ve come to learn fun is less think and more do. You’re either having fun or you’re not.”

Backed by research and personal experiences, Mike shares ways to be intentional about fun. While he is not opposed to striving, he says, “instead of auditing your calendar for productivity, audit it for fun.” Use the PLAY model to identify and sort activities based on their level of challenge and degree of fun. Create your “fun file” to document and prioritize your fun habit. This book is for you if you’re ready to change and add more delight to your life. Mike says, “We don’t get through life without enduring periods of disappointment, pain, and loss. Fun is the magical balm that makes the slings and arrows bearable.”

 



 

2. Interesting Perspective - Slow Change

Change can happen quickly, but more often, it occurs slowly after percolation and transition. During a recent talk, Todd Henry, author, speaker, and creative thinker, described “how ideas tend to come in seasons, not moments.” He started to say, “there is a slow emergence.” Instead, he accidentally combined the words and said, “there is a slowmergence.” A new phrase was born.

Todd further described slowmergence and said, “We tend to think that ideas are sudden clicks, or a-ha’s, but they more often emerge as networks and patterns over time until one inciting incident illuminates what’s been developing for days or weeks.”

I often see this with my clients when they are seeking change. While it might appear as if a change is happening suddenly, it usually has been simmering for a long time. There can be an “inciting incident,” as Todd mentions, that brings clarity and action.



Fun is the magical balm that makes the slings and arrows bearable.
— Mike Rucker, Ph.D.



3. Interesting Film – Navigate Change

Recently, I had the joy of privately screening Kate Schermerhorn’s incredible award-winning documentary film, Do I Need This? The film is about “American excess and the stuff from which happiness is truly made.” While the stats are compelling, with American homes containing an average of 300,000 objects, or 93% of Americans using their garages for storage, this film explores so much more.

Kate shares about the environmental impact of our stuff while weaving in her family’s story and personal experiences of acquiring and letting go. These themes are supported by interviews including the leading expert in Hoarding Disorder, Dr. Randy Frost, Plentitude author and economist Juliet Schor, and artists and environmental activists Judith Selby Lang and Richard Lang.

Change is another theme in the film. We witness shifts in relationships with people and their stuff. Dr. Frost recognizes how “possessions often have an essence for us.”  That “essence” can make it challenging to release. Kate said, “I just want to hold onto the past while simultaneously letting go.” This film is an honest, beautiful journey about openings for change and the impact of stuff on our lives and the planet.





 

4. Interesting Product – Easy Change

There are times while going through a change when you wish it were “easy” or “done already.” There’s nothing like adding some humor to a stressful situation. Knock Knock has a great way of infusing playfulness into their organizing products.

The I Just Want It All pad brings whimsy and order to task and change management. You can select the options quoted above along with the third choice, “dipped in chocolate,” and then list your things to do below. The bottom of the pad asks, “Is that so wrong?” I think not. Change can be challenging, but with this list, you’ll be able to focus with a smile.

 

 

5. Interesting Thought – Accept Change

Change can be messy and challenging. It involves doing new things, altering habits, reframing perspectives, and stepping outside your comfort zone. You will make mistakes, experience adversity, feel vulnerable, practice new skills, and test your patience. It’s normal to have some “oops” moments along the way. In fact, it’s a great sign which is a change indicator. Embrace the mistakes. They will bring growth, learning, and the changes you seek.

 

Do you have an interesting change discovery? Which of these resonates with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
Is Resistance Something That Has Paralyzed Your Fresh Start?

Resistance is something we’ve all experienced at one time or another. Resistance can be an indicator or an internal alert system to stop you from doing something harmful. However, it can also prevent you from growing, learning, and embracing something extraordinary, like the fresh start a new month or year brings.

Do you remember when you pulled back instead of leaning into an idea, opportunity, or suggestion? Maybe you encountered an external or internal “should” statement that elicited the response, “No way am I going to do that!” Or, perhaps fear showed up when a significant opportunity presented itself. Instead of embracing the unknown, you retreated.

One of the weekly emails I enjoy receiving is from my business and website consultant, Tanya Moushi. Recently, she mentioned writer Steven Pressfield’s characterization of resistance as “the artful insidious feeling that holds us back from doing the things that are meaningful to us.” What a powerful force when resistance prevents us from doing what we truly desire.

 

I personally experience and also frequently observe resistance with my virtual organizing clients. There can be a disconnect between the work and habit changes needed to achieve desired goals. That disconnect can show up as resistance. My clients might want to live with less clutter, yet they resist letting go. They might wish to clear living and working spaces, but they continue purchasing more to fill those areas.

Acknowledging resistance is part of the work we do together. We notice when it appears and talk about what it indicates and how to work with it.

I’m still in the vision board-creating process and will share more about it in the coming weeks. However, I chose my theme for the year: “What would it take?” In Zoe Chance’s Influence is Your Superpower, she writes about how this is the magic question that cuts excuses and respectfully opens the door for “surprising answers that you would never have expected.”

The question, “What would it take?” acts as my resistance melter. I’ve been actively experimenting with that question to help me when I encounter resistance to:

  • Letting go of unhelpful thoughts

  • Getting unstuck when the next step isn’t clear

  • Shifting my perspective

  • Making complicated plans

  • Getting out of my own way

What would it take?
— Zoe Chance

With the start of this year, you have an opportunity to embrace the motivation a new beginning brings. If you resist the changes you want to make, it’s worth exploring what that’s about. Is it indicating there is something you, in fact, don’t want to change? Or is fear or uncertainty blocking you? What would it take to move forward? If you need clarity to figure it out, please reach out. I’m ready to help.

How are you making the most of your fresh start? Where have you encountered resistance? What has helped you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.