Are there things in your life that just aren’t working? Maybe you have organizing systems, but they are cumbersome or impossible to maintain. Perhaps your spaces include what you use but aren’t set up in accessible ways. Or maybe your calendars are so packed with appointments and commitments that you don’t have time to rest and recharge. These are significant. Figuring them out and letting go can feel challenging.

Not all challenges are tricky. You might experience less complex issues that aren’t working. For example, you often:

• Misplace your eyeglasses or keys

• Can’t find a working pen when you need one

• Search for the flashlight you had just the other day

• Run out of milk

• Move the same pile of papers from your desk to the floor.

Because these seem like insignificant challenges, you ignore them. You experience a slight annoyance here and feel bothered by something there. It’s enough to notice but not enough to do anything about it.

Enough Already

Doing something to remedy the situation can take months, years, or decades. You tolerate the inconvenience until one day, you say, “Enough is enough!” When that day comes, you are ready to let go of what’s not working to make way for what does.

Here’s the funny thing. When you get to the it’s-enough-already-point, that’s when the magic happens. You are ready to:

• Let go of being irritated

• Be mindful of what’s going on

• Have room in your brain to problem-solve

• Change the status quo

The Lamp

Some of you may know I’m short, under five feet tall. We had a lamp in our bedroom that sat on the dresser for years. It was a colorful glass lamp with a purple shade. I liked it except for one thing. Because of the tall dresser, the placement of the switch high up on the lamp, and my height, it was difficult for me to turn the light on and off.

Each time I pushed the switch, I would stretch by standing on my tippy toes to reach it. Was it awkward and slightly annoying? Yes! Did I do this for a lot of years? Yes! Why? Because I ignored the irritation and my agency to change what wasn’t working.

As we were preparing our house for guests, my husband and I worked on various projects. Something about working on those projects activated my thoughts. I had an “Enough is enough” moment. An idea popped into my head. Why not replace the lamp with one that isn’t as tall? Or, more specifically, change it to one I could easily reach. What a simple solution!

Within a few days, I bought a new lamp, a black base with a white shade. While I like how it looks, I love that I can reach it…easily! No more tippy toes are required. And each time I turn the switch, I can’t help but smile. Honestly, a few times, I’ve squealed with delight.

“Are you ready to let go of what’s not working to make way for what does?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Why Let Go?

It’s easy to keep doing what you’ve always done, even if it’s annoying. But when you’re willing to let go of what’s not working, you make room for what is. And when that happens, joy and happiness will follow.

I don’t have to stretch anymore to reach the lamp. Instead, I will learn to ‘stretch’ in other ways. What else is possible? What else can I improve?

How about you? Are you ready to thrive? What becomes possible when you let go of what’s not working? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help letting go of those things, habits, or situations that no longer serve you? If so, reach out anytime. Please email me, Linda, at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Letting go is possible, especially with support.

One of the treasures of being human is our capacity for thought. Ideas that visit your mind can become seeds for creating marvelous inventions or provocative works of art. Your thoughts can turn into action for self-change or positive advances in the world. Thoughts can foster compassion for people in distress or motivate you forward.

What happens when you have unhelpful thoughts? Have you ever engaged in negative self-talk, unnecessary doubt, self-sabotaging thoughts, or word loops that keep you stuck? I have and so have many of my clients. It’s not productive or helpful, but it is a common human experience.

Years ago, I traveled to Austin for an organizing conference. During one of the breaks, I walked into town and discovered this message spray-painted onto the side of a building. It said, “We don’t say fried. We say, deep sauté.” Talk about a reframe! Some of you will agree that eating fried foods isn’t the healthiest choice. Saying “deep sauté” instead doesn’t make the food more nutritious, but it immediately changes my perspective to something more positive. That is the power of the reframe.

While I’m not encouraging you to eat more fried or deep-sauteed foods, I suggest you use this concept to adjust your negative self-talk and other unproductive thoughts.

Let’s test some out.

Instead of:                                          Use:

I’ve never been organized.                 I’m learning to get organized.

My clutter is overwhelming.               I am decluttering a little bit each day.

I don’t know how to get organized.   I will reach out for organizing help.

I’m not good enough.                         I am enough.

I have so much to do.                         I get to focus on what is most important.

“One of the treasures of being human is our capacity for thought.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

What are some of the negative, self-sabotaging thoughts you have? What are alternate reframes? Does it help you think differently by changing your perspective? Your mind can be channeled in many ways.

The next time you’re going down the adverse rabbit hole, stop. Reframe and adjust your thoughts in a more supportive direction. If you need help reframing and activating, I’m just a phone call or email away. I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to reach out and/or join the conversation.

As the cold freeze of winter chases the second month of this New Year, are you actively pursuing the changes you want to make in your life? Or, are you in the research and planning phase? Maybe change is the farthest thing from your mind. I’ve noticed during my latest conversations how people are at different ‘change’ points. Some have committed to specific changes, others are pondering change, and some want no change. Where are you right now on the change spectrum?

Recently I discovered three inspiring ideas. I considered them concerning these ‘change’ conversations. Especially if you are in the midst of change or trying to decide what changes you want to pursue, one of these concepts could help you clarify your direction or encourage a perspective shift. 

3 New Trends Will Inspire You to Make Remarkable Changes

1. The Big Quit

Life has changed in numerous ways. The last two-plus years of the global pandemic affected how we live, think and respond. The pandemic has influenced “the great resignation” or “the big quit,” where millions of employees from all industries are leaving their companies in droves. They no longer want to continue as they had, which was not working for them. Instead, they’ve gone for more significant opportunities, higher pay, and better scheduling flexibility. Enough was enough.

How does “the big quit” relate to you? Use this mantra to ask questions to encourage change in your life.

• What are you currently doing that is not serving you well?

• What do you need to “quit?”

• Is your home environment cluttered and draining your physical and emotional energy?

• Do you have ineffective systems that don’t support who you are and what you’re doing?

• Which unhelpful habits are preventing you from living your best life? 

• What do you want to stop doing that no longer works for you?

• What do you want to “quit” to transform your life?

2. Resilience Hubs

According to Google, the word used most to describe 2021 was “exhausting.” It’s no surprise since we’ve had to navigate the pandemic for another year. We’ve experienced loss, working differently, and shifting COVID protocols. We’ve had to balance work and family life with continually changing rules and a mutating virus (now Omicron BA.2). And as if this weren’t enough, we’ve experienced political unrest, inflation, and unprecedented uncertainty. I’m exhausted just thinking about all of this. What is the antidote to fatigue?

Recently, I heard about “Resilience Hubs.” These are trusted physical spaces, typically located in urban areas, established to support communities during regular times and disasters. With local government and residents as their leaders, these hubs have better communication and can more easily pivot to provide the resources the community and its members need to thrive.

As you pursue the changes you want for this year, consider creating your own personal resilience hub. What do you need to replenish your reserves after the exhaustion from the last few years? My resilience hub includes:

• Meditating daily

• Walking in nature

• Doing yoga

• Practicing mindfulness

• Spending time with friends and family

• Getting enough sleep

• Letting go of things that drain my energy

What will you include in your resilience hub?

“Which unhelpful habits are preventing you from living your best life?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

3. The Magic Question

Zoe Chance, Yale University professor and author of Influence Is Your Superpower, was interviewed on NPR this month. During the conversation, I was especially intrigued when host Leila Fadel asked her to elaborate on a section in her book about the magic question. Magic question? I couldn’t wait to hear what it was. Are you thinking the same thing?

The magic question: What would it take?

As Zoe explains, “The magic question is magic because…it’s respectful…you get creative and surprising answers that you would never have expected. And…when they tell you, here’s the roadmap to success, they are implicitly committing to supporting that outcome.”

Change is hard. Often it’s a challenge because we get in our own way with excuses, doubt, or fear. But if we activate some magic, in the form of this magic question, what becomes possible? As you navigate your path of change, ask, what would it take to:

• have an organized, decluttered home?

• have a workspace that helped me focus and supported my needs?

• have time to work and relax?

• have  . . . ?

I hope that with some new tools or phrases at the ready, you will be inspired to pursue the change you desire. Did one of these ideas resonate with you? Did you discover something today to help? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

As always, if you want help on your change path, I’m an email or phone call away. Reach out at any time to schedule your virtual organizing session. Find me at linda@ohsoorganized.com or 914-271-5673. I’m ready to help facilitate the change you desire.

What is it with guilt and the difficulty of letting it go? We feel guilty when we think we’ve done something wrong or failed to do something we thought we should have done. We blame ourselves when something we feel responsible for we didn’t do. During several recent conversations, I’ve noticed that we’ve been especially hard on ourselves and experienced many types of guilt. We’re living in an unusual time. The world is in crisis because of the COVID-19 pandemic. Life has changed overnight for many of us, and we are adjusting to living differently. Stress and emotions are heightened, as is our tendency for self-blame and guilt.

Let’s be kinder. We are living in a raw wound-like state. Letting go of guilt is an act of self-compassion. There are several guilt themes I’ve noticed. I’ll share them with you, along with some encouragement for letting go. What have you observed? 

How to Let Go of Guilt During the COVID-19 Crisis

Productivity Guilt

In a recent The New York Times article, “Stop Trying to Be Productive,” Taylor Lorenz makes the case that the message we’re hearing is that we should be more productive with the “extra hours” we were gifted because of the pandemic. However, our experience is quite different. Even though we might have freed-up hours in the day because we aren’t commuting to work or have no work, we are exhausted. We’re finding it challenging enough to take care of the basics. So we are experiencing productivity guilt because we aren’t organizing our decades of memorabilia, cleaning out our garages, writing that novel, or accomplishing more in a day. Let your productivity guilt go.

I admit to erring on the side of staying productive. I want to accomplish things. But I also recognize that we are experiencing grief-like symptoms. So instead of pushing and expecting, we need to be gentle and compassionate. Adjust your expectations of what productivity looks like for now. Instead, focus on what you need to feel healthy, calm, and sane. That might mean a shift to a human being rather than doing.

Being Normal Guilt

Daily meditation is an essential part of my morning routine. Especially now, I am so grateful for this practice. Most days, I use guided meditations on the Insight Timer app. Lately, I’ve been experimenting with some newly released practices that focus on helping us navigate the COVID-19 crisis. They help me with discovering useful perspectives, offering calming strategies, and increasing compassion for self and others. In a recent practice, I listened to Rick Breden’s “Six Questions to Ask Yourself During COVID-19.” Rick is a psychotherapist and CEO of Behavioral Essentials. He asked this question,“What expectations of normal am I letting go of today?”

“What expectations of normal am I letting go of today?”

— Rick Breden

I loved that question because so many of us expect that we should be living like business as usual. But there is nothing ordinary about this time. Having some grace to let go of “normal,” means we can also let go of that guilt. We can let go of should and gift ourselves flexibility and the time needed to adjust to living differently.

Boundaries Guilt

I predict that at some point, you will be directly touched by COVID-19. You might have a family member, coworker, or patient that has it.  As humans, we’re wired to help people. Many people are being asked to go above and beyond to serve and help others while they are potentially putting themselves in harm’s way. Healthcare workers are being asked to be on the front lines and possibly come out of retirement or enter the workforce pre-graduation to assist all those in need. You might have a family member living with or near you that is ill and needs your help, which could put you in danger of also getting sick. Each of us has to decide what we are willing and not willing to do. What risks are we willing to take? And choosing not to help in every situation can result in a lot of guilt. This is a personal choice and a difficult one. If you are experiencing guilt around asserting your boundaries, I understand. Consider what you need to feel safe and remain healthy. Let the boundary guilt go.

Commitment Guilt

When I commit to something or someone, I like to honor my word. If I don’t, I feel guilty, and as though I’ve failed myself and the other person. This has happened a few times in the past few weeks. Circumstances were such that I wasn’t able to be at an event I had committed to or plan an annual event. In one instance, a family member needed my help, and that took priority over another commitment. In the other case, I recognized I didn’t have the bandwidth now to plan a large (virtual) gathering. And even though intellectually I understood the reasons, I was harsh with myself. I felt guilty for changing what I had committed to. I recognized that the kindness I needed was to let go of that guilt. So if you have experienced something similar, it’s time to let go. Grant yourself some grace and flexibility. Be open to adjusting your commitments if needed, guilt-free.

Complaint Guilt

There are so many horrific things happening in the world. People are dying, losing their jobs, and unable to feed their families. Communities are being destroyed. Health care workers are overworked and don’t have adequate protective gear and supplies to help those in need. Because there are so many horrible things going on, we feel guilty complaining about inconveniences like having spring vacation taken away or being unhappy with having to work virtually. There will always be someone that has it worse than you do. So instead of feeling guilty about complaining, perhaps turn it around and focus on gratitude. You can be grateful that you have a job, and simultaneously be upset and guilty that you don’t like how you’re being asked to do your job right now. Those two things can exist simultaneously. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s important to honor and express your feelings. Complaining or expressing is cathartic. Let go of the guilt and need we have to do it.

Communication Guilt

Many of us are in more intense contact with people now. We use a variety of ways to keep in touch and reach through the phone, email, texts, letters, Face Time, Skype, Zoom, or other platforms. Some of us are communicating with family, friends, and coworkers in new ways or more frequently. For some of us, it might feel like a full-time job. There are so many people we are concerned about in various corners of the world and in our lives. After several weeks of this, some of us are beginning to feel exhausted by the pandemic talk. Even though we think we should be reaching out, what we really feel like doing is retreating into our cocoon. No talking. No communicating. Just being still and quiet. That response is resulting in some feelings of guilt. After all, we keep hearing how important it is to stay in touch with people. So many are isolated. For those feeling guilty about wanting to communicate less, let your guilt go. Honor your needs. This doesn’t have to be an all or nothing. Take a break or reach out less frequently. Adjust what enough feels like.

We’re all feeling raw with the changes and uncertainty. It’s essential to focus on those things that lift us up, reduce stress, and help us feel centered. From there, we can increase our reserves so we have something left to help others. Guilt depletes us. Be generous with your self-compassion. Are you having difficulty letting go of guilt? What are you experiencing? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to leave a comment and join the conversation.