Do you feel more stressed during the holiday season? What is the source? Holiday-related stress might revolve around travel planning, gift-giving, card-writing, decorating, over-committing, or entertaining.

As someone who enjoys and has hosted many gatherings, I continually work on reducing stress. Experience helps. The more I do something, the easier and less stressful it becomes, and the better I am at planning and navigating surprises. However, a more significant aspect is mindset. If I keep telling myself how stressed I am, what happens? I reinforce that feeling.

What is Scruffy Hospitality?

Recently, I heard about “scruffy hospitality,” which is a more relaxed approach to entertaining. It’s a practice and also a mindset. The idea is to prioritize connection and conversation over obsession with creating picture-perfect environments and Instagram-worthy meals. The concept includes having people over without cleaning up first and approaching food more simply. Instead of making elaborate dishes, ‘scruffy’ entertaining loves potlucks, leftovers, and takeout.

While “scruffy hospitality” was coined a decade ago by Jack King, an Anglican priest from Tennessee, it has received more attention in the last few years. It rejects unrealistic social media standards that create pressure on us to be “perfect hosts.” Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity. These involve letting go.

For this holiday season, especially if you’re stressed, I encourage you to incorporate some ‘scruffy’ into your life. It will look different for each person. Consider how beneficial scruffy hospitality could be for reducing your stress.

As a seasoned host, ‘scruffy’ isn’t a term I naturally associate with entertaining. I like to clean and prepare. Don’t get me started on my to-do lists. I enjoy the visual aspect of decorating the tables, arranging flowers, and creating colorfully plated dishes. Those aspects aren’t stressful for me. However, those and other aspects of entertaining might be stressful for you. And if it is, some of the suggestions below can help.

11 Ways to Reduce Holiday Stress by Embracing Scruffy Hospitality

• Reframe Clean – Do a quick clean instead of a deep one. Or hire someone else to clean.
  

• Organize Less – Declutter the dining room only, leaving all other areas in their ‘as is’ state.

• Recruit Help – Ask guests to bring parts of the meal.

• Minimize Decor – There is no need to go wild. A single plant, a small vase of flowers, a bowl of fruit, or an arrangement of gourds is a minimalist way to decorate a table. You can also leave things bare.

• Be Present – Cook with your guests instead of preparing things in advance.
  

• Try Self-Serve – Set up your food buffet-style rather than as a plated, sit-down meal.

• Don’t Cook – Forget about cooking anything. Purchase the entire meal or a few dishes.
  

• Do Less - Simplify your menu with fewer choices or prepare dishes requiring minimal ingredients.
  

• Dress Down – Be comfortable and show up as you are. No fancy clothes are required.
  

• Reduce Scope – Fewer guests can make the gathering more manageable. Dial down your invite list to reflect your ideal number of guests.

• Simplify Gift Giving – Focus on clutter-less gifts for you and the recipients. Give meaningful time-centered gifts like movie tickets, museum passes, or personal care services.

“Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

How I’m Incorporating Scruffy Hospitality This Season

One thing I decided to do differently this year is not to bake the apple and pumpkin pies. Instead, our daughter generously offered to make pies. While I’ve always baked, removing the pie-baking task frees up some time and reduces stress around coordinating kitchen usage with my husband. We share cooking for Thanksgiving and work around each other’s schedules and tasks. No pie baking this year means I’ll eliminate the stress of negotiating for counter, oven, and refrigerator space.

The other area where ‘scruffy’ applies is the number of guests. We love having a houseful of family and friends for the holidays. However, some guests have health issues or scheduling conflicts this year. While we’ll miss them greatly on Thanksgiving, fewer guests give me more time to talk with people. Managing the flow of the space is less stressful with fewer people, too.

Human-Considered Holidays

The holidays don’t have to be stressful. There are many ways to increase joy and minimize stress. How can you relax your approach to holiday hospitality? What will help you make it more joy-filled and less stressful? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help decluttering, organizing, brainstorming, or planning? Do you need an accountability partner? I’m here for you. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward - A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Are there things in your life that just aren’t working? Maybe you have organizing systems, but they are cumbersome or impossible to maintain. Perhaps your spaces include what you use but aren’t set up in accessible ways. Or maybe your calendars are so packed with appointments and commitments that you don’t have time to rest and recharge. These are significant. Figuring them out and letting go can feel challenging.

Not all challenges are tricky. You might experience less complex issues that aren’t working. For example, you often:

• Misplace your eyeglasses or keys

• Can’t find a working pen when you need one

• Search for the flashlight you had just the other day

• Run out of milk

• Move the same pile of papers from your desk to the floor.

Because these seem like insignificant challenges, you ignore them. You experience a slight annoyance here and feel bothered by something there. It’s enough to notice but not enough to do anything about it.

Enough Already

Doing something to remedy the situation can take months, years, or decades. You tolerate the inconvenience until one day, you say, “Enough is enough!” When that day comes, you are ready to let go of what’s not working to make way for what does.

Here’s the funny thing. When you get to the it’s-enough-already-point, that’s when the magic happens. You are ready to:

• Let go of being irritated

• Be mindful of what’s going on

• Have room in your brain to problem-solve

• Change the status quo

The Lamp

Some of you may know I’m short, under five feet tall. We had a lamp in our bedroom that sat on the dresser for years. It was a colorful glass lamp with a purple shade. I liked it except for one thing. Because of the tall dresser, the placement of the switch high up on the lamp, and my height, it was difficult for me to turn the light on and off.

Each time I pushed the switch, I would stretch by standing on my tippy toes to reach it. Was it awkward and slightly annoying? Yes! Did I do this for a lot of years? Yes! Why? Because I ignored the irritation and my agency to change what wasn’t working.

As we were preparing our house for guests, my husband and I worked on various projects. Something about working on those projects activated my thoughts. I had an “Enough is enough” moment. An idea popped into my head. Why not replace the lamp with one that isn’t as tall? Or, more specifically, change it to one I could easily reach. What a simple solution!

Within a few days, I bought a new lamp, a black base with a white shade. While I like how it looks, I love that I can reach it…easily! No more tippy toes are required. And each time I turn the switch, I can’t help but smile. Honestly, a few times, I’ve squealed with delight.

“Are you ready to let go of what’s not working to make way for what does?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Why Let Go?

It’s easy to keep doing what you’ve always done, even if it’s annoying. But when you’re willing to let go of what’s not working, you make room for what is. And when that happens, joy and happiness will follow.

I don’t have to stretch anymore to reach the lamp. Instead, I will learn to ‘stretch’ in other ways. What else is possible? What else can I improve?

How about you? Are you ready to thrive? What becomes possible when you let go of what’s not working? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help letting go of those things, habits, or situations that no longer serve you? If so, reach out anytime. Please email me, Linda, at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Letting go is possible, especially with support.

Spring is a fun time of year. It’s a welcome change from grayer winter days. I’m continually amazed by the new beautiful blooms appearing every day. The daffodils are starting to wilt as the tulips and lilacs are emerging. Growth radiates hope and possibilities as the landscape becomes greener and more colorful.

Lightening up and letting go are integral to the spring season. However, sometimes, the letting go process can feel overwhelming. You might be trying to decide what to let go of or are challenged with activating.

There are many ways to work through to the other side. One letting go strategy is so effective that I highly recommend trying it. I’ve used this myself and with clients, and it always works. I’m using this exact strategy now, which I’ll share.

Value of a Deadline

You might want to edit but are having difficulty beginning. Perhaps you want to declutter because guests will be visiting. Maybe you feel like your space is piled with stuff that you no longer want. Or, you’re thinking about downsizing and letting go of the excess. Your “why” is clear, but you’re procrastinating.

One of the best letting go strategies is to combine a deadline with accountability. For example, I have a donation pick-up scheduled this week with GreenDrop®. They are a nationwide resource that accepts donations through pick-up or drop-off locations. Knowing GreenDrop® will be here on a specific date incentivizes me to let go now. I’ve been filling bags and boxes of things I want to release. When I set the deadline, I gave myself enough time by factoring in my other commitments.

Here's the thing. Could I let go of even more? Sure! However, given the time I have to edit, I’m letting go of enough to make a difference. The good news is I can always schedule another pick-up when I’m ready to say goodbye to more.

Letting Go Questions

I often think about letting go. Sometimes, it’s about unhelpful thoughts or time challenges. Yet, right now, I’m focused more on editing the physical stuff- things like clothing, household wares, linens, books, cosmetics, or pantry items.

When decision-making, I ask letting go questions like:

• Has it overstayed its welcome?

• Does it fit?

• Do I still like it?

• Is it damaged beyond repair or even repair-worthy?

• Do I use or wear it anymore?

• Is it expired?

• Is it taking up space and no longer worth the real estate?

• Has it served its purpose?

• Is it necessary?

• Am I ready to say, “It’s been nice knowing you?”

“One of the best letting go strategies is to combine a deadline with accountability.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Do I ever get stuck? Of course. I expect it, but I don’t let that deter me. I focus first on the less challenging items. Then, I circle back to the trickier things and make a decision. I might keep those things a little longer or let them go. It’s a low-pressure, fluid process.

Do you use deadlines to facilitate letting go? What works for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

If you need help with letting go, reach out anytime. Please email me, Linda, at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Letting go is possible, especially with support.

It’s a busy time of year. Maybe you’re already in play mode. Or perhaps you’re scrambling to finish up those year-end projects so you can enjoy your time off during the holidays. We often feel an ongoing push-pull between resting and producing. And our balance between the two can become completely off-kilter. At other times, there is a better mix.

Life can be incredibly confusing this time of year. You have a ton to accomplish, but you’d rather be off to enjoy the sounds, sights, and scents of this twinkly, festive season with your family and friends.

Deadlines and Deliverables

I’m pushing to prepare several workshops for the first quarter of 2024. I’m so excited about them! Stay tuned for updates, which I’ll announce soon. The first round of deliverables is almost complete. Then, I’ll be able to enjoy the break and festivities even more.

My guess is you are in the midst of things, too. Maybe you’re preparing and organizing your home for a houseful of guests. Perhaps you’re doing some last-minute holiday gift shopping or putting the finishing touches on your holiday décor. Or, like me, maybe you’re focusing intently on completing your 2023 goals and projects.

An Inspired Perspective

Whatever is going on, I came across an idea in Glennon Doyle’s Untamed, which I thought would help. It’s a beautiful perspective, which I, for one, want to hold close. She wrote,

“Hard work is important. So are play and nonproductivity. My worth is tied not to my productivity but to my existence. I am worthy of rest.”

— Glennon Doyle

I love this! As someone driven to work hard and be productive, I need this reminder. Perhaps you do, too. Life is not just about work. While I know this, I want to embrace Doyle’s message even more. I will thoroughly lean into the joy of playing, being, and resting. I will let go of defining my worth by what I produce.

How is your balance this season? What do you want more of? What do you want to release? How can I help?