There are times when life goes sideways. The unthinkable happens, and you feel you have no control over anything. Your mood is dark, and hope is barely accessible. Cognitively, you understand there are no guarantees in life and that chaos is present. Yet, how do you cope? What can you do when nothing makes sense, and things feel out of control?

I don’t pretend to have the answers or know what you’re experiencing. I’m navigating this challenging time, too. Yet, I have a few strategies that are helping me, which might be helpful to you.

Instead of focusing on the areas you have no control over, shift your attention. Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.

5 Courageous Coping Strategies When Life Feels Out of Control

1. Supercharge Your Self-Care

Take care of yourself. During stressful times, you might ignore the basics. However, doing that makes you feel worse and less able to cope with challenges.

Recommit to self-care basics. Get enough sleep, hydrate, eat nutritiously, and move your body. Walking in nature has additional mood-boosting benefits.

Beyond essential self-care, consider getting a massage, manicure, or pedicure. Or how about taking a yoga, exercise, or meditation class?

Be kind to yourself and engage in intentional, mood-enhancing activities within your control.

“Recommit to self-care basics.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 2. Engage With Your Community

You might want to retreat when feeling out of sorts. However, I encourage you to do the opposite. Reach out to those who are also feeling ‘it.’ You’re not alone.

Your friends and family may be struggling, too. Connect with your loved ones. Pool your strengths while offering and receiving support.

3. Curate the Input

Scrolling social media, listening to the news, and fueling the fire may not be the healthiest choice. Cut yourself off (even if temporarily) when the external input you’re allowing adds to those out-of-control feelings.

Just as I encouraged you to eat nutritious foods to nourish your body, do something similar for your mind. Curate the input to minimize anxiety-producing thoughts and maximize ones with a more positive effect.

This could be a great time to read that new book or your favorite magazine from cover to cover. Or maybe you prefer to watch a comedy show or movie.

I’m not suggesting you ignore the outside world forever, but for this day, while building your resilience, choose to disengage with stress-inducing news. Control the input.

“Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Make Something

There is a gift in making something from nothing. What kind of something? Maybe you like to bake, write blog posts or in journals, take photographs, write poetry, or knit scarves. Perhaps you want to paint, write music, do a craft project, or create fancy cocktails.

Take control of a joy-inducing physical activity and make something. Enjoy the process and the result.

I’ve already journaled and worked on this post. Guess what else I did? I baked (and ate) some Almond Butter Chocolate Chip cookies. Fortunately, these cookies are not only delicious but also nutritious. I just have to remember to eat them in moderation. Wish me luck.

5. Declutter Your Space

Physical disorganization and chaos in your environment can affect how you feel and function. The disarray adds to a feeling of lack of control. You don’t know where things are or have the mind space to focus.

There is mood-boosting power in decluttering and organizing. The act of doing, making a change, and then experiencing the benefits of that shift is palpable.

You can’t control everything, but you can improve your corner of the world (or desk).

Human Coping Skills

Remember, you are resilient, and you have people to lean on. To help navigate challenging times, exert control in tiny yet significant ways. This won’t change everything, but it will help to calm and ground you. What coping strategies do you use when life feels chaotic?

If you need help decluttering, organizing, planning, or grounding, I’m here for you. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

What becomes possible when you get organized enough? Will you suffer less? Will your mental health and well-being improve due to better organization and flow?

For over 30 years, I have been a professional organizer, helping overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized.

I’ve observed a direct correlation between disorganization and distress. Creating order in the areas within your control significantly improves your external and internal state of being.

Recently, I had the joy of speaking with John Burton, a singer, songwriter, author, and host of the Home From Here podcast. John is fascinated by the intersection of organization and mental health, and he invited me to talk about that and much more on his show.

I invite you to listen to the podcast, episode 193, to hear the entire conversation. You might even discover a few surprising personal details, such as how I start my day, what my household was like growing up, and my favorite color. Although, I bet you can guess that last one even without listening to the podcast. You all know me so well.

Read about these three ideas I featured from our conversation about organization and well-being, and enjoy the podcast, too.

Home From Here - Episode 193 - John Burton with guest Linda Samuels

3 Ways Getting Organized Reduces Suffering and Improves Your Well-Being

1. “Organization made me feel better.”

John Burton, Home From Here podcast host with Linda Samuels - Episode 193

John noticed that organizing specific areas of his life made him feel better. You can learn more about his mental health journey from our conversation. One of the things he mentioned was how life-changing it was to organize his time and habits, especially his morning routine. As John experienced, better organization enhanced his day’s flow and well-being. He “felt better.”

Many of my clients have mental health challenges, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and OCD. The organizing piece has been elusive. Often, the external chaos reflects what’s happening internally. Through our work, I see a positive shift as we remove the disorganization blockages, create manageable systems, and focus on being “organized enough.” It’s not about perfection but about organizing in a way that helps you live with more ease.

What will be possible as you feel better?

2. “If I could only get it all done, life would be perfect.”

John asked me about the “trick” to time management. There are many different philosophies about managing yourself and your time, and there isn’t one definitive trick. However, I’ll share two significant principles of time management.

The first thing to understand about time management is acknowledging that you’ll never get it all done. And just so you know, I say those words as someone who is highly optimistic. People often think life would be perfect if you could “only get it all done.”

Whether your to-do list is in your head, on paper, or on an electronic list, as soon as you cross off a completed task, a new item appears. That’s the human condition. If you’re alive, you will have things to get done.

Even when your list is overflowing, I encourage you to embrace opportunities for joy and delight and let go of perfection. As John said, “If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

The second time management concept is about clarifying your priorities. Focus on aligning your priorities with what you spend time on. In addition, not all tasks will be related to things you’re passionate about. There are life management responsibilities like doing laundry, getting groceries, showering, or paying bills. Those might not excite you, but they are a necessary part of living.

Does all or most of your time go to life maintenance? Is little to no time reserved for your passions or priorities? If so, looking at where your time is going and making some adjustments is helpful.

What becomes possible when your priorities are clarified?

“If you can accept imperfection, stress goes way down.”

— John Burton

3. “I can see a path forward.”

John and I discussed virtual organizing and how I typically have 60-minute Zoom sessions with my clients. My goal is to help them get unstuck enough to take action, make progress, and feel better.

At the beginning of a session, clients might feel overwhelmed, discouraged, or hopeless. By the end of the hour, they’ve experienced progress (a physical change, perspective shift, or new system) and can see possibilities.

We take baby steps that boost confidence and agency. Progress happens during and between the organizing sessions. Clients learn organizational skills and how to integrate them into their busy lives.

 What will be possible as you clear your path?

What is Possible?

Toward the end of our conversation, John said he was “struck” by “the amount of reducing suffering” I’m doing.

Life has hiccups and stress. I am passionate about helping my clients get unstuck, make progress, live with more ease, and feel better. Getting organized enough, letting go of perfection, shifting perspectives, and focusing on priorities can make a significant difference. What is possible for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Are you ready to get unstuck, organize, and improve your well-being? If so, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Turning possibilities into reality is achievable, especially with support.

Do you resist asking for help? Maybe you’re unsure who to ask, prefer to do things yourself, or feel too overwhelmed to figure out what guidance you need. However, there are so many reasons to enlist support.

As a professional organizer, I am in the helping industry and love assisting my clients. I help overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized. Services can include assisting with long and short-term projects, providing accountability, editing, decluttering, designing customized organizing solutions, brainstorming, and planning.

While I like to do many things independently, I ask for help, too. Support has been incredibly beneficial for:

• Redesigning my website

• Writing and publishing a book

• Installing a new roof

• Working on boards and committees

• Trimming trees

• Creating my office space

• Hosting holiday dinners

• Caring for my parents

• Maintaining my health

• Producing my virtual workshops

• Maintaining our home

• Talking through personal and business challenges

“Having a need and needing help is not a sign that you’re weak. It’s a sign that you’re human.”

— Kate Northrup

Does this sound familiar? If so, you’re going to love what follows. You’re about to discover uplifting stories about the power and relief of enlisting help.

I invited a marvelous group of colleagues to share their personal experiences. They describe their time to ask-for-help indicators and the value of listening to those cues. These generous friends include Diane Quintana, Ellen Delap, Janet Barclay, Janet Schiesl, Jonda Beattie, Julie Bestry, Kara Cutruzulla, Sara Skillen, Seana Turner, and Yota Schneider.

My deepest gratitude goes to this inspiring group for sharing their time, hearts, and wisdom with us. I asked them to respond to and elaborate on this prompt . . .

Describe one indicator that it’s time to ask for help.

10 Best Reasons to Ask for Help

Help Indicator #1: Annoyances

“The best indicator that you should seek help is when others call attention to how often (or for how long) you've mentioned a problem. Whether it’s a tech kerfuffle or health concern, a household area in disarray, or a financial hiccup, we may not notice how much we tolerate repeated annoyances. We get used to jerry-rigged computer solutions or an aching back, sagging closet shelves, or mystery fees. But when friends or colleagues reflect back to us that we’ve repeatedly referenced a frustration that we haven't made the effort to solve, it's a clue that it's time to seek professional guidance or outside support.”

Julie Bestry, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer, Productivity Specialist, Author &  Blogger

Help Indicator #2: Prioritization

“A solid indicator of needing help is when I’m feeling what I call ‘locked up.’ It’s challenging for me to prioritize. I start making weird little mistakes, and I’m exhausted. Physically, it feels like I’m surrounded by invisible walls. I try to get ahead of it and affirm that it’s not only acceptable to reach out for support but imperative. As someone who’s been a solopreneur for years (wearing all the hats!), now transitioning into a role with lovely people happy to help me, it’s fun - if a bit strange - to recognize I don’t have to do everything alone.”

Sara Skillen, PCC, COLC, CPO® – Director of Education, Coach, Author & Blogger

Help Indicator #3: Task Completion

“One indicator of when to ask for help is when you struggle to complete a task that you used to do easily.

In my case, I used to trim all the bushes along the front of our house. I own a power trimmer, and while trimming isn't glamorous, I was quite able to get the job done. Over the years, in spite of my trimming, the various bushes have grown, requiring me to reach higher and higher to trim the tops of the bushes. Last year, I realized that I could no longer reach high enough. I considered climbing a stool to trim the bushes, but the weight of the trimmer was hard to balance. I finally acknowledged that the job had gotten beyond my ability and brought in a third party. Yes, it cost me a bit of money, but in the end, it was the wisest, safest, and most efficient solution. 

Seana Turner – Professional Organizer and Productivity Coach

Help Indicator #4: Technology

“I know it's time to ask for help when a task takes longer than I can reasonably bill for, especially if it’s due to technical issues beyond my expertise. Recently, I added an event calendar to a client’s website, but the registration buttons weren’t working. Instead of agonizing over it, I contacted my tech support team, and the problem was fixed in under 15 minutes. Having access to experts who can help in various areas—both business and personal—saves time and reduces stress.” 

Janet Barclay – Certified Care Plans Specialist, Website Caregiver & Designer

Help Indicator #5: Emergencies

“When my clients first reach out to me for help, I often hear the expression, ‘so overwhelmed.’ I recently experienced that feeling myself. My husband had a medical emergency that landed him – and me by his side – in the ICU with no idea of how many days we would be there. For me to give him my full attention, I knew it was time to ask for help from my tribe. What burdens they lifted from me!”

 Jonda Beattie – Professional Organizer

Help Indicator #6: No Progress

“It’s time to ask for help when I remain stuck, even after reviewing the problem and creating a plan for moving forward. If I’ve done all that work and still can’t progress, I am confident I need support and will get help.

My current problem is creating and implementing a marketing plan. I am a professional organizer and a former primary school teacher, but I do not have a business background, even though I manage and run my business. It has taken many failed attempts at marketing the different aspects of my business to get me to accept that I need hands-on help. 

Diane N. Quintana, CPO-CD®, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer, ADHD Organizing Specialist, Author & Blogger

“It’s time to ask for help when I remain stuck.”

— Diane N. Quintana

Help Indicator #7: Collaboration

“I am a born collaborator! Any task has better results and is more fun when I collaborate. Also, I know it is time to enlist help when I have reached my final level of skill and know the project needs a tweak.

An example of this is opening my Etsy shop with new content. I reached a point where I knew that the e-book needed sparkle for effective marketing and professional appeal. Fortunately, I had identified an amazing collaborator with great design skills and knowledge of opening a shop. Enlisting help not only improved the end product but also made the process run smoothly. Having this positive experience also helps me know that this is the right decision to ask for help in the future.”

Ellen Delap, CPO® – Certified Professional Organizer

Help Indicator #8: Heavy Lifting

"Asking for help and getting the help we need the way we need it can be complicated. I was wired and conditioned to be self-reliant and independent, and I like to know how things work and how to fix them. Also, specific projects provide the creative outlet I need. Still, depending on the nature, goal, and cost of a project, certain things are better addressed by those who know what they are doing. As an example, this comes to mind.

When the pandemic hit, we invited our daughter to move back home with us. Her office in New York City, where she lived, had closed, and it made no sense to stay there. Until then, we used to do the heavy lifting whenever our daughters needed to move. This time, we hired a friend and professional mover to help. The experience was not only less stressful but almost enjoyable. Could we have done it ourselves? Sure, but it would have taken much more time and placed undue stress and burden on our bodies."

 Yota Schneider, Certified Seasons of Change® Master Coach –Retreats Facilitator & Blogger

Help Indicator #9: Overwhelm

“I know it's time to ask for help when I feel overwhelmed, and sometimes it sneaks up on me. Recently, my mom's health deteriorated, which has caused many changes - big life events. As the organized sibling, I usually take the lead when things happen with Mom, but recently, I've been overwhelmed as things get added to the list of to-dos. I start worrying that I'm dropping the ball on something important.

Asking for help from my siblings and my husband has helped. We each take on tasks that fit into our schedules and lines of expertise. Keeping the lines of communication open through a text thread and phone calls is key to our efforts. We all want what's best for Mom, so my indicator of when it's time to ask for help is when I feel overwhelmed.

Janet Schiesl, CPO® – Professional Organizer, Owner of Basic Organization

Help Indicator #10: Perspective Shift

“I’ve been noticing a specific sensation: when I feel like I’m staring down a long, dark hallway without doors, it’s a sign my work or creative project is trapped in tunnel vision. I’m stuck asking, ‘How do I do this?’ when I should ask, ‘Who can help me do this?’ This reframing nudges me to clearly define my needs and the people who can help. Quickly, a new ‘who’ can illuminate the path, offer guidance, or simply encourage you to keep going – and suddenly, doors can appear.”

Kara Cutruzulla – Author, Lyricist & Project Coach

When did you recently ask for help? What benefits did you experience? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you feel stuck or overwhelmed and want to get organized, I’m here to help. I love supporting my clients in making progress. Contact me, Linda, at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5643, or schedule a Discovery Call. Your goals are attainable, especially with support.

Have you wondered how clutter affects your mental health and well-being? As a Professional Organizer for over 30 years who works with individuals challenged by disorganization, I have seen firsthand how clutter can negatively impact behaviors, self-esteem, and mental health. I’m about to share an insightful tool for assessing the impact of clutter on your life.

Recently, Melissa Tracey interviewed me for the Houselogic article, How Clutter Creates Stress and Anxiety: Strategies for Decluttering, and a podcast for The Housing Muse about the relationship between home clutter and its effect on mental health.

Many of my clients have mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression, and OCD. Clutter can worsen issues by increasing feelings of stress, anxiety, sadness, frustration, and overwhelm. While professional organizers can help with specific strategies to reduce clutter and increase organization, having the support of a mental health professional can be essential.

Mental Health Awareness Month

May is Mental Health Awareness Month. It began in 1949 to reduce the stigma around mental health conditions and provide awareness, support, and resources. The World Health Organization states:

• 1 in every 8 people, or 970 million people in the world, live with a mental disorder

• Anxiety and depressive disorders are the most common

• Mental disorders involve significant disturbances in thinking, emotional regulation, or behavior

• Most people do not have access to adequate care

Contact the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) for information, helplines, and support.

Self-Assessment Clutter Tool

The Clutter Quality of Life Scale (CQLS) was developed by Dr. Catherine Roster, Associate Professor at Anderson School of Management at the University of New Mexico, with help from volunteers from the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD). Catherine is a dynamo, and I had the privilege of working with her on the ICD Board.

The CQLS is a self-assessment tool “designed to measure inward, or subjective, consequences of clutter from the individual’s perspective.” Clutter is defined as “an overabundance of possessions.”

The CQLS scale contains 18 statements about clutter, which a person rates from “1 = strongly disagree and 7 = strongly agree.” These statements reflect the level of negative consequences clutter has on four areas: your relationships, personal finances, the livability or functionality of your home and space, and feelings of anxiety, guilt, and depression. Here are a few examples from the assessment:

• Social impact: “I avoid having people come to my house because of the clutter.”

• Livability impact: “I have to be careful when walking through my home in order to avoid tripping over objects.”

• Financial impact: “I often buy things I already have because I don’t know where things are in my home.”

• Emotional impact: “I feel depressed by the clutter in my home.”

Click on the link to take the CQLS assessment.

“I feel depressed by the clutter in my home.”

— The Clutter Quality of Life Scale

Personal Impact of Clutter on Mental Health and Well-Being

Clutter shows up in many ways and can negatively affect your mental health and well-being. Here are a few examples of what you might experience:

• Your sink is always full of dishes, which makes it difficult to cook and eat nutritiously. It also affects your energy and health.

• Your bed is cluttered with clothing waiting to be cleaned or put away. You’re been unable to sleep there for weeks. As a result, your anxiety increases as your lack of sleep, energy levels, decision-making abilities, and mood suffer.

• Your papers are in piles on your kitchen counter. You can’t find the bill you know is due tomorrow. Your anxiety increases as you search for the bill. Hours later, you discover it buried in a pile in another room.

Have you noticed ways clutter affects mental health and well-being? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you are struggling with clutter and mental health issues, don’t go it alone. Get the support you need from a Professional Organizer like me and a mental health provider.

Reach out and email me, Linda, at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Decluttering is possible, especially with support.