The things you say or think can act as possibility-blockers, preventing you from moving forward. They can be subtle or obvious. You might not notice how these phrases get in your way.

The blockers may sound like:

• “I can’t do this.”

• “It’s too hard.”

• “I can’t tolerate the discomfort.”

• “I’m just not good at this.”

• “I’m unable to figure this out.”

• “I don’t know where to start.”

• “I don’t have any skills.”

• “Nothing ever seems to work out.”

• “I’m really frustrated, and I don’t know what to do.”

• “I never finish anything.”

• “It has always been like this, and I can’t change it.

• “I’m feeling totally overwhelmed.”

• “Nobody ever taught me how to do this.”

• “I can barely get through today, let alone think about tomorrow.”

• “I’m stuck where I am.”

• “I’m too busy and don’t have time to find a solution.”

• “I can’t imagine what’s possible because my mind and space are so cluttered.”

That’s a lot to take in. Have you noticed yourself repeating any of these phrases? Maybe you have different go-to messages that aren’t helping you. Take a moment to identify which thoughts are shutting you down.

What did you find out?

Focusing on negative messages reinforces your lack of agency. You are paying attention to defeat. While you might not be able to eliminate negativity completely, there is hope. In fact, here is a three-step approach that can help. It consists of awareness, reframing, and action.

A Three-Step Approach: Transform the Impossible into Possible

Step 1: Develop Awareness

“The only limits to the possibilities in your life tomorrow are the ‘buts’ you use today.”

— Les Brown

Notice the messages that aren’t serving you. Each time you repeat them, those neural pathways in your brain become stronger. The applies to positive messages, too. Becoming aware of your thoughts is the first step in changing them.

• Observe and record.

• Write down your negative thoughts and messages without judgment.

• Make a note of how frequently they ‘visit’ you.

Step 2: Experiment with Reframing

“Take your mind off the problems for a moment, and focus on the positive possibilities. Consider how very much you are able to do.”

— Ralph Marston

Once you recognize which negative messages appear and how often they do, you’re ready for this next step.

When you notice yourself repeating the undesired words, use that as a cue to reframe them. Make a mental or written note. Intentionally craft a statement that reduces the power of negative thoughts and promotes healthier, more proactive messages.

Reframing examples:

•  “I can’t do this,” can become “I’m learning to do this.”

• “I don’t know where to start,” can become “Just start anywhere.”

• “Nobody ever taught me how to do this,” can become “I can learn and will ask for help.”

• “Nothing ever seems to work out,” can become “The past doesn’t have a hold over my future.”

Step 3: Do Something

“The possibilities are numerous once we decide to act and not react.”

— George Bernard Shaw

Negative messages can cause doubt and inaction. One way to overcome them is by taking action. After trying out the reframes, you’re ready to move on to this last step.

Ask yourself, “What tiny action can I take to move this project or situation forward?”

Make the action as small and simple as possible. That’s where the real change begins. By doing something, you shift from “I can’t” to “I can.”

Taking action changes your thinking and behavior. It helps you move from feeling stuck to being proactive.

Action also helps you to:

• Be more creative when facing challenges,

• Build momentum,

• Foster a sense of agency,

• Achieve your goals, and

• Nourish hope.

What Is Possible When You Change Your Message?

You’re human. You’ll have internal and external messages that are negative and unhelpful. However, by learning to acknowledge, reframe, and take action, you can change the course of today and the future. Words and thoughts matter. Are yours supporting or hindering your growth? Change the messages so you can thrive.

Which ideas resonate most with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, stuck, or disorganized? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk. I’m easy to reach.

• Schedule a Discovery Call

• Fill out the Contact form

• Email me at linda@ohsorganized.com or

• Call 914-271-5673

Getting organized and making progress is possible, especially with support.

The decisions you make relate to different points in time: the past, present, and future. Although you may not always view your choices this way, considering these time parameters can help reduce decision fatigue and create clarity surrounding decision-making.

Making thoughtful decisions can be challenging. Some common decision-making obstacles include:

• Having too many choices

• Lacking clarity

• Feeling rushed

• Asking unhelpful questions

• Deciding when you’re exhausted

• Being afraid to make the wrong choice

Any of these challenges can cause overwhelm, procrastination, or paralysis. However, when you ask questions based on time, it can cut through the noise, clarify your options, and motivate action.

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1. Question to Let Go of the Past

“What’s weighing down your backpack that needs to be released?”

— James Clear

In a recent edition of James Clear’s 3-2-1 newsletter, he explained how “unfinished tasks” carried in your “invisible backpack” weigh you down. Many of these tasks are ones you will think you “should do,” but will probably never get around to.

Clear suggests two strategies. To “lighten the load: finish the task or let it go.” Applying a past timeframe to your decision about completing or releasing a task can help.

Consider these questions:

• How long have you been worrying about and carrying these tasks with you?

• Are past goals or commitments holding you back?

• Which ones are no longer relevant, important, or necessary?
  
  
  
  

2. Question to Improve the Present

“What small change could you make to your surroundings that would steer you toward good habits and away from distractions?”

— James Clear

In another 3-2-1 newsletter, Clear encourages making tiny tweaks to your environment to support building better habits and reducing distractions. Only you know which habits you want to strengthen and which distractions are getting in your way.

Using the present timeframe idea to make proactive choices can be effective here. To do this, think about a current habit you want to build or improve. For example, let’s say you often run late to appointments. This is a source of stress for you and the people in your life. You want to be more punctual, yet find it challenging to get out of the house on time. Let’s say chronic lateness is caused by disorganization at home or your tendency to hyperfocus, which interrupts your sense of time.

Making a slight change in your environment to mitigate distractions and support a better habit could include things like:

• Gather everything you need the night before

• Wake up earlier to prepare

• Use labeled timers to help with transitions and activation

3. Question to Imagine the Future

“What will my future-self thank me for doing now?”

— Stephanie Sarkis, PhD

In Ari Tuckman’s book The ADHD Productivity Manual, he shares one of his favorite questions posed by Stephanie Sarkis, PhD. She asks, “What will my future-self thank me for doing now?”

Let’s apply the future timeframe lens to this inquiry. While the question asks you to do something in the present, it’s in service of your future self.

Think about a goal you want to achieve. Maybe it’s organizing your legal and end-of-life papers, downsizing, or eating healthier. None of these will be realized in the future without taking action now.

Embrace the future construct. Visualize what ‘done’ will look and feel like. This will motivate you now to take action and accomplish the future results you desire.

How to Make More Thoughtful Choices?

Making wise decisions begins with asking good questions. Including a time perspective can clarify your choices. Do you consider the past, present, and future when making decisions? How does using a time construct affect you?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you need support with organizing, letting go, or managing your time? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk. You can:

• Schedule a Discovery Call

• Email me at linda@ohsorganized.com or

• Call 914-271-5673

Organizing your time and space is possible, especially with support.

When you think about change, which emotions bubble up? As someone who has observed, experienced, and helped others make changes, I’ve noticed many reactions. When anticipating change, we can experience mixed emotions, including fear, frustration, anxiety, doubt, overwhelm, sadness, ambivalence, excitement, relief, and hope.

Emotions are powerful. They can paralyze or propel us, depending on which ones are in play.

• What if you could stack the deck in your favor?

• What if you could shift your perspective to encourage a more joyful experience for your desired changes?

• How would that alter your journey?

When you think about making a change, it can feel enormous, confusing, and unreachable. For example, let’s say you feel overwhelmed and frustrated by the clutter and disorganization in your life. You want things to change but don’t know what to do or how to begin. As a result, you do nothing.

A common organizing philosophy encourages breaking down large projects or goals into small, doable parts or tasks. Using this strategy is an effective path forward. You keep the larger goal in mind while focusing your effort on tiny, baby steps. This process reduces overwhelm and facilitates forward movement.

Encourage Change by Shifting Your Perspective

During a recent meditation and writing retreat led by my friend and colleague, Yota Schneider, she shared an insightful question. We considered it in a particular context around focusing.

However, the more I thought about it, the more I recognized how you could use the question to encourage change through a lens of positive expectations.

The question Yota shared was from neuropsychologist and author Dr. Rick Hanson. He asked,

“What will I be glad I did today?”

I appreciate the question’s simplicity and graciousness. What will I be glad I did today? The question has several fascinating effects.

• Contemplate – It invites you to consider joy, happiness, gratification, or satisfaction as the driving force. In other words, you are taking action inspired by this positive perspective.

• Strengthen – It offers a nonjudgmental inquiry while strengthening activation confidence. You imagine this positive change or task as if you have already accomplished it. The question boosts agency.

• Reduce – While it doesn’t overtly state this, the question implies a narrower, singular focus. Dialing down the possibilities to something smaller can reduce or eliminate overwhelm.

• Imagine – It merges present action with positive, immediate future results. You are doing something now that you will be happy you did later today.

• Build – Using this question to navigate change gently promotes a repeat-and-build pattern versus a one-and-done method.

• Act – The question is non-confrontational. It’s even kind of fun. You’re focusing on how good you’ll feel or “glad” you are when you do that thing today. 

“Encourage change through a lens of positive expectations.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Work the Present and the Future

Once you gear your mind toward a “glad I did today” focus, you will experience many positive changes that connect with your larger goals. Here are several of the positives I’ve experienced recently and the change categories they influenced. I am glad I:

Relationships – Nurture and Strengthen

• Celebrated my husband’s birthday

• Cooked with my daughter

• Sent packages and notes to our kiddos in advance of Valentine’s Day

• Had assorted conversations with friends, family, and colleagues, including a friend I hadn’t spoken with in way too many years

Professional – Lead and Learn

• Completed the edits and returned my chapter for a new ICD book on chronic disorganization

• Led a planning meeting for my organizing colleagues for NAPO Westchester

• Had virtual organizing sessions with my clients

• Wrote my blog

Finances – Manage and Build

• Gave our accountant a preliminary tax summary

• Paid bills

• Reconciled accounts

Household – Maintain and Edit

• Cleared out the 2024 files and set up the 2025 files

• Did laundry

• Added a few clothing items to the donation bag

Well-Being – Calm and Care

• Scheduled vaccines

• Didn’t eat that extra piece of cake

• Took a walk along the river even though it was cold

• Slept later than usual

• Went to yoga class

• Meditated

It’s Your Turn to Invite Change

Which categories in your life are you looking to change? What is one thing you can do today that will bring you closer to that goal? With this in mind, what will you be glad you did today? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or inviting positive change? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Change is possible, especially with support.

There are times when life goes sideways. The unthinkable happens, and you feel you have no control over anything. Your mood is dark, and hope is barely accessible. Cognitively, you understand there are no guarantees in life and that chaos is present. Yet, how do you cope? What can you do when nothing makes sense, and things feel out of control?

I don’t pretend to have the answers or know what you’re experiencing. I’m navigating this challenging time, too. Yet, I have a few strategies that are helping me, which might be helpful to you.

Instead of focusing on the areas you have no control over, shift your attention. Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.

5 Courageous Coping Strategies When Life Feels Out of Control

1. Supercharge Your Self-Care

Take care of yourself. During stressful times, you might ignore the basics. However, doing that makes you feel worse and less able to cope with challenges.

Recommit to self-care basics. Get enough sleep, hydrate, eat nutritiously, and move your body. Walking in nature has additional mood-boosting benefits.

Beyond essential self-care, consider getting a massage, manicure, or pedicure. Or how about taking a yoga, exercise, or meditation class?

Be kind to yourself and engage in intentional, mood-enhancing activities within your control.

“Recommit to self-care basics.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 2. Engage With Your Community

You might want to retreat when feeling out of sorts. However, I encourage you to do the opposite. Reach out to those who are also feeling ‘it.’ You’re not alone.

Your friends and family may be struggling, too. Connect with your loved ones. Pool your strengths while offering and receiving support.

3. Curate the Input

Scrolling social media, listening to the news, and fueling the fire may not be the healthiest choice. Cut yourself off (even if temporarily) when the external input you’re allowing adds to those out-of-control feelings.

Just as I encouraged you to eat nutritious foods to nourish your body, do something similar for your mind. Curate the input to minimize anxiety-producing thoughts and maximize ones with a more positive effect.

This could be a great time to read that new book or your favorite magazine from cover to cover. Or maybe you prefer to watch a comedy show or movie.

I’m not suggesting you ignore the outside world forever, but for this day, while building your resilience, choose to disengage with stress-inducing news. Control the input.

“Identify and engage in what is nourishing and within your control.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Make Something

There is a gift in making something from nothing. What kind of something? Maybe you like to bake, write blog posts or in journals, take photographs, write poetry, or knit scarves. Perhaps you want to paint, write music, do a craft project, or create fancy cocktails.

Take control of a joy-inducing physical activity and make something. Enjoy the process and the result.

I’ve already journaled and worked on this post. Guess what else I did? I baked (and ate) some Almond Butter Chocolate Chip cookies. Fortunately, these cookies are not only delicious but also nutritious. I just have to remember to eat them in moderation. Wish me luck.

5. Declutter Your Space

Physical disorganization and chaos in your environment can affect how you feel and function. The disarray adds to a feeling of lack of control. You don’t know where things are or have the mind space to focus.

There is mood-boosting power in decluttering and organizing. The act of doing, making a change, and then experiencing the benefits of that shift is palpable.

You can’t control everything, but you can improve your corner of the world (or desk).

Human Coping Skills

Remember, you are resilient, and you have people to lean on. To help navigate challenging times, exert control in tiny yet significant ways. This won’t change everything, but it will help to calm and ground you. What coping strategies do you use when life feels chaotic?

If you need help decluttering, organizing, planning, or grounding, I’m here for you. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.