Do you feel more stressed during the holiday season? What is the source? Holiday-related stress might revolve around travel planning, gift-giving, card-writing, decorating, over-committing, or entertaining.

As someone who enjoys and has hosted many gatherings, I continually work on reducing stress. Experience helps. The more I do something, the easier and less stressful it becomes, and the better I am at planning and navigating surprises. However, a more significant aspect is mindset. If I keep telling myself how stressed I am, what happens? I reinforce that feeling.

What is Scruffy Hospitality?

Recently, I heard about “scruffy hospitality,” which is a more relaxed approach to entertaining. It’s a practice and also a mindset. The idea is to prioritize connection and conversation over obsession with creating picture-perfect environments and Instagram-worthy meals. The concept includes having people over without cleaning up first and approaching food more simply. Instead of making elaborate dishes, ‘scruffy’ entertaining loves potlucks, leftovers, and takeout.

While “scruffy hospitality” was coined a decade ago by Jack King, an Anglican priest from Tennessee, it has received more attention in the last few years. It rejects unrealistic social media standards that create pressure on us to be “perfect hosts.” Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity. These involve letting go.

For this holiday season, especially if you’re stressed, I encourage you to incorporate some ‘scruffy’ into your life. It will look different for each person. Consider how beneficial scruffy hospitality could be for reducing your stress.

As a seasoned host, ‘scruffy’ isn’t a term I naturally associate with entertaining. I like to clean and prepare. Don’t get me started on my to-do lists. I enjoy the visual aspect of decorating the tables, arranging flowers, and creating colorfully plated dishes. Those aspects aren’t stressful for me. However, those and other aspects of entertaining might be stressful for you. And if it is, some of the suggestions below can help.

11 Ways to Reduce Holiday Stress by Embracing Scruffy Hospitality

• Reframe Clean – Do a quick clean instead of a deep one. Or hire someone else to clean.
  

• Organize Less – Declutter the dining room only, leaving all other areas in their ‘as is’ state.

• Recruit Help – Ask guests to bring parts of the meal.

• Minimize Decor – There is no need to go wild. A single plant, a small vase of flowers, a bowl of fruit, or an arrangement of gourds is a minimalist way to decorate a table. You can also leave things bare.

• Be Present – Cook with your guests instead of preparing things in advance.
  

• Try Self-Serve – Set up your food buffet-style rather than as a plated, sit-down meal.

• Don’t Cook – Forget about cooking anything. Purchase the entire meal or a few dishes.
  

• Do Less - Simplify your menu with fewer choices or prepare dishes requiring minimal ingredients.
  

• Dress Down – Be comfortable and show up as you are. No fancy clothes are required.
  

• Reduce Scope – Fewer guests can make the gathering more manageable. Dial down your invite list to reflect your ideal number of guests.

• Simplify Gift Giving – Focus on clutter-less gifts for you and the recipients. Give meaningful time-centered gifts like movie tickets, museum passes, or personal care services.

“Scruffy hospitality is a nod to embracing imperfection and authenticity.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

How I’m Incorporating Scruffy Hospitality This Season

One thing I decided to do differently this year is not to bake the apple and pumpkin pies. Instead, our daughter generously offered to make pies. While I’ve always baked, removing the pie-baking task frees up some time and reduces stress around coordinating kitchen usage with my husband. We share cooking for Thanksgiving and work around each other’s schedules and tasks. No pie baking this year means I’ll eliminate the stress of negotiating for counter, oven, and refrigerator space.

The other area where ‘scruffy’ applies is the number of guests. We love having a houseful of family and friends for the holidays. However, some guests have health issues or scheduling conflicts this year. While we’ll miss them greatly on Thanksgiving, fewer guests give me more time to talk with people. Managing the flow of the space is less stressful with fewer people, too.

Human-Considered Holidays

The holidays don’t have to be stressful. There are many ways to increase joy and minimize stress. How can you relax your approach to holiday hospitality? What will help you make it more joy-filled and less stressful? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

Do you want help decluttering, organizing, brainstorming, or planning? Do you need an accountability partner? I’m here for you. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward - A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

Are you feeling the fast whoosh of time passing with the holiday season arriving, the elections looming, and the year ending? It’s a lot to take in. You may feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you’re thinking about what goals you wanted to accomplish this year, the time left to do it, and what is actually possible.

Maybe your thoughts are occupied with ‘regular’ life maintenance to-dos plus hundreds of holiday-related tasks, including gift shopping, holiday meal prepping, guestroom readying, travel planning, and family and friends’ gatherings.

Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.

I often say that life is in the joyful doing and presence of the moment. And while that’s all well and good, when you’re stressed and overwhelmed, accessing that presence can be more challenging.

With so much going on with work and family, externally and internally, this time of year, making tiny adjustments is helpful. Infusing compassion and mindfulness into your thoughts and actions will encourage a more joyful, fulfilling, and happier holiday season.

I offer you a thought, question, and strategy to help.

3 Ways to Prepare for a Compassionate Holiday Season

1. One Thought: “We don’t have to be perfect.”

Let’s remove the idea of perfection from the holiday season. Why impose more pressure, stress, or unrealistic expectations on yourself or others?

Try channeling your perfectionism energy differently. Focus your energy on one of these options instead:

• Excellence

• Personal best

• Good enough

• Progress

• Ease

• Done

As the Noom app said about overcoming thought distortions, “…it’s about recognizing that we don’t have to be perfect. We’re human.”

Which reframe of perfectionism (one suggested or something else) is helpful for you?

“Breathe. You’re human, and you’re juggling many things.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

2. One Question: “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

One of my favorite recent discoveries is James Clear’s weekly 3-2-1 email, which my client told me about. The idea he wrote about last month feels relevant and worth sharing.

Clear wrote, “Forget about the outcome and focus on what precedes it.” He asks, “Am I putting myself in good positions and creating the conditions for success?”

Consider Clear’s question in the context of which actions and thoughts you can focus on to create a joyful, compassion-filled holiday season. They might include:

• Planning

• Lowering your expectations

• Creating boundaries

• Simplifying goals and tasks

• Decluttering

• Scheduling rest and renewal time

What will you choose to focus on to create a positive holiday season?

“We don’t have to be perfect.”

— James Clear

3. One Strategy: “Accept help.”

Do you tend to do everything yourself? Perhaps you don’t want to impose on others. Or, Seth Godin suggests you might think, “Doing the tasks is more efficient than coordinating the help.” Either philosophy results in you doing all the work, which can lead to resentment and exhaustion. Neither of those is a recipe for happy holidays.

Whatever the season, enlisting and accepting help improves your life. We’re human and benefit from the support and interactions with others. What type of help will benefit your life and infuse more ease? Who can you ask for help? How will that change your experience? If you’re having guests over and they offer to help, lean in and say “Yes.” Have tasks ready to delegate. It will make them feel comfortable and reduce pressure from your list.

Godin says, “It’s much more productive to accept help. When we have a project, part of the work is to enlist others in figuring out how to make the change we seek.”

Let me know if you’re stressed and need a thought partner, decluttering and organizing guide, planning help, or accountability buddy. In my virtual organizing sessions, I offer one-hour focused sessions, ongoing support, and personalized guidance to help you with your goals and challenges. I’m available and am ready to help.

Human Holiday

Do you know the 1953 movie Roman Holiday, starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck? This season, I encourage you to embody a Human Holiday.

• Let go of what you can.

• Invite in what you want.

• Enlist the help you need.

For a less stressful and happier holiday season and beyond, I’m here to help. Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization and ease are possible, especially with support.

We’re in the thick of the holiday season. Holiday music permeates the background as you stroll through stores, restaurants, and grocery stores. Is it just me, or do you catch yourself singing along? I can’t help it. The music is contagious. Your balance might be excellent right now. You feel unencumbered, giddy, and joyful with the glitter and whimsy of the holiday season. Or, you might feel overwhelmed by your physical or mind clutter. The overwhelm makes it challenging to focus on twinkling lights, time with loved ones, and feeling at ease.

Finding balance is a constantly moving pursuit. When your balance wanders too far in one direction, it’s time to adjust. It’s an excellent season to make some changes. It will set you up for a happier, more peaceful holiday time. No one wants to be preoccupied with clutter at the expense of enjoying celebrations, cozy time around the fire with family and friends, and quiet moments of relaxation or reflection.

My clients have been especially motivated and focused on recalibrating their balance in the past several weeks. Their physical and mental clutter reached a tipping point, encouraging them to edit, let go, and organize. It’s been exciting to help them make the changes they desire. Enlisting my help enabled them to clarify and recommit to their goals, get unstuck, reduce overwhelm, and feel energized with hope. Making small steps, taking action, and experiencing progress are the secret ingredients to finding your desired balance.

While there are many potential areas to balance, I’ll share five common ones that can inspire positive changes for you.  

5 Positive Benefits of Creating More Balance for Happy Holidays

1. Balance Clothing Clutter

Are you familiar with the One-in, One-Out Rule, a commonly used organizing principle? This encourages you to release one equivalent-type item you no longer want, like a pair of pants or a sweater, when you bring in something new. This concept helps you maintain your current space and organization.

A more substantial edit is helpful if your clothing closets are already tight or overflowing. Especially at this time of year when we are gifted things, including clothing, it’s beneficial to do some closet and dresser editing now. I encourage you to release those items that no longer fit, you don’t like, are worn or stained beyond repair, and are never selected to wear. Let those go. Create visual and physical space for your clothing. You’ll be able to get dressed more easily and know that you love wearing what remains.

2. Balance Mind Clutter

What thoughts are swirling around in your brain? Are your tasks, projects, and decisions to make preoccupying your thoughts? You may have one particularly significant project that is shouting the loudest and making it challenging to focus on other commitments. It’s time to rebalance with the Brain Dump.

An excellent first step is releasing your thoughts from your head and capturing them on paper, a digital document, or a voice recording. Let them out! What happens when we keep them in? The mind clutter continues to swirl around. It keeps us stuck and preventing us from taking action. You can get easily fooled when thinking overtakes doing. It might seem like you’re accomplishing something because that ‘thing’ is all you think about. But you aren’t doing, you’re ruminating.

Action, which brings about progress, is the key to reducing your mind clutter. Select one tiny task from your list. It can be the next step in moving forward on that big project or a single one-and-done-type task. Continue to select something from your list and turn your tasks into small, doable actions.

3. Balance Desk Clutter

Often, my clients tell me they can't think or work when their desks are out of balance and cluttered. Paying bills, writing, scheduling, making calls, or responding to emails can be challenging when your desk surfaces contain visual and physical clutter. The items that collect over time onto your surfaces are waiting for decisions. The objective is to remove things you don’t need visible or belong elsewhere, like

• Old or fileable papers

• Extra office supplies

• Random items that ‘landed’ there or

• Other people’s stuff

When your desk balance is off, invest time to recalibrate. This doesn’t mean it needs to be completely empty. Find a balance between what you need to be immediately visible and accessible and those things that can be stored or moved elsewhere.

Edit, let go, reroute, and breathe. Can you feel a sense of relief?

“When your balance wanders too far in one direction, it’s time to adjust.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Balance Pile Clutter

Are you a piler? You might see stacks of books, magazines, gifts, toiletries, craft supplies, and more. Guess what happens when a pile gets too big? It becomes off balance with the potential to tip. The tipping can cause a tripping hazard. Who needs that during the holiday or any season?

Here’s the good news about these piles containing larger physical objects. Each item takes up a significant volume of space. That means your editing and decision-making power creates visible results more quickly. Here are some examples:

• A one-foot pile of sweaters to edit = about 5 decisions

• A one-foot pile of books to edit = about 18 decisions

• A one-foot pile of magazines to edit = about 36 decisions

Compare these to:

• A one-foot pile of papers to edit = about 240 decisions

If you want quicker progress on your piles, focus on editing the objects that take up more space and require fewer decisions. You’ll be less likely to experience decision fatigue.

5. Balance Paper Clutter

Why does paper collect? There are several reasons, such as

• It needs to be filed

• It is out as a visual cue

• Belongs to someone else

• Requires a decision

• Is pending

• Is part of an active project

• It needs to be routed elsewhere

• It needs to be shredded, tossed, recycled, or digitized

While the reasons are valid, the paper clutter often seems to multiply when we’re sleeping. Getting papers into a manageable balance hinges on your paper management system. This will include an area to

• Store frequently referenced files

• Organize current action items

• Archive less frequently accessed files

• Recycling container

• Garbage container

• Shredder or container to collect shredding

Investing in your paper management system will create flow, reduce paper clutter, and increase productivity. What a beautiful gift to give yourself in preparation for the holidays. And if you can’t focus on this before the season, why not set it as a goal for the New Year?

As you navigate the fullness of the holiday season, what will help you recalibrate your balance? Let me know how I can help with editing, decluttering, and organizing. I’m here for you. Schedule your virtual organizing session today. Reach me, Linda, at 914-271-5637, linda@ohsoorganized.com, or through my contact form.

I wish you a happy, joyful, and organized holiday season!

What does spaciousness mean to you? When our minds, rooms, and schedules are cluttered and overflowing with thoughts, stuff, and obligations, it can be challenging to find expansiveness. As humans, having spaciousness, in whatever form it appears, can be beneficial. You will experience less stress, improved mental well-being, greater creativity and productivity, and improved accessibility. What if you had more spaciousness in your life?

This morning, my guided mindfulness meditation practice reinforced my need for open expanses during the week. While I do well with a schedule, I also crave moments when I’m not on the clock. Yesterday was one of those days. Sure, it was the weekend, when days can be more open, although we often are busy doing things. However, yesterday was my birthday.

My husband Steve and I took the day off to play and suspended doing any work or house stuff. I can’t tell you how much I appreciated and enjoyed having a day like that. We had a loose plan. We walked along the Hudson River, ate at one of my favorite Italian restaurants, and saw a movie.

Space to Enjoy The Moments

There was no rushing. We enjoyed each thing until we were ready to move on. We had plenty of time to be present with what we were doing and each other. I also had space to soak in all the loving birthday messages from family and friends.

Happier Hour author Cassie Holmes, Ph.D., said, “The mosaic you create is the magnificent life you get to live.” What will you include in your artwork? What will you release?

“The mosaic you create is the magnificent life you get to live.”

— Cassie Holmes Ph.D.

The Value of Spaciousness

Why is any of this important? Being intentional about creating space will help you enjoy and appreciate life more. Consider how adding more white space will make the holiday season more enjoyable and less stressful. Whether you are hosting, going to gatherings, traveling, or staying put, spaciousness is your friend. What would it be like to have uncluttered spaces, clarity of thought, and time for what’s most important to you?   

This week, I invite you to clear some clutter, do a brain dump, or block out unscheduled space in your schedule. What will be possible when you eliminate rushing? What will become possible when you clear the landscape within and without?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.