What is it about asking for help? Is it something you do readily? Or, do you tend to do or want to do everything yourself? There is no shame in enlisting help. So why do we procrastinate, stress, and delay getting support? As a professional organizer, I am used to receiving calls from overwhelmed folks who want help. I am also a person that at times, struggles to ask for assistance.

This happened recently to me. My mom died in March. While many of the things around her death I completed, I still have a few things to do. One of those tasks is getting her footstone made. I wanted the same company that made my father’s footstone, help make my mom’s. I obsessed about getting the footstone created and installed. I added a task to my list but kept postponing it. Maybe I wasn’t ready. Or, perhaps ordering the footstone made my mom’s death feel more final. I didn’t move forward or ask for help. I stayed stuck.

And then last week, the day arrived. The cue to work on mom’s footstone project appeared on my to-do list again. I pulled out my file, found the name and number of the monument company, picked up the phone, and dialed. Here’s the incredible thing. Within a few minutes, they knew who I was, where my mom was buried and gave me clear next steps for getting the footstone made. A half-hour later, they emailed me all of the details- the quote, forms to complete, and checks to write.

I had been stressed and obsessing for months. By enlisting help from a professional, I was able to take those next steps. Getting the process started was such a huge relief. It felt like a giant weight was lifted. I couldn’t believe how simple it was and how long I had berated myself for not getting help. One phone call yielded such comfort. 

“There is no shame in enlisting help.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Then it hit me that mine and my clients’ experiences are similar. When potential clients contact me, they often are overwhelmed, stuck, and have felt that way for a long time. They describe reasons they procrastinate about getting help, which include:

• Embarrassed for needing help

• Despair that they feel like a lost cause

• Unsure of who to call

• Frustration that they “should” be able to get organized on their own

They feel their disorganization and situation is impossible. However, when you are willing and ready for change, movement is possible.

“When you are willing and ready for change, movement is possible.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

My clients make positive shifts during their virtual organizing sessions, and it’s a beautiful change to see. I’ve written about this before with the types of transformations they have during a typical one-hour session. Enlisting help is beneficial. Virtual organizing clients might begin their sessions feeling overwhelmed, but the story doesn’t end there. Here are some recent thoughts clients expressed at the end of their sessions:

• “I see the light at the end of the tunnel.” 

• “I know I can do it. I can pair things down.”

•  “It was kind of overwhelming but easier than I thought.”

• “Saying goodbye to the past- it felt good, cathartic.”

• “Amazing. This is such a good feeling.”

•  “My pile of ‘going’ is getting bigger.”

•  “Things feel mentally more manageable.”

•  “This feels so good what we did today. At the beginning of the session, I felt like crying. Now I feel giddy.”

Like my clients, I felt better and moved forward when I sought out help. When was the last time you reached out for support? What did you experience? Was the help you received beneficial? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation. 

When my organizing clients describe how they feel about their clutter, the word they use most frequently is “overwhelm.”  Their accumulation of papers, magazines, clothing, toys, gadgets, housewares, or collections has turned into what they perceive as “overwhelming clutter.”  Clutter tolerance varies. For some, a small pile of papers will feel overwhelming, and for others, a closet bursting with clothing will tip their overwhelm scale. Response to clutter can make you feel stuck or motivated to take action. Both reactions are normal. 

If your clutter is making it hard to focus, move through your space, or adding extra stress, this is an excellent time to use a simple strategy.  I use it regularly with my virtual organizing clients. We activate the decluttering magic of the mindful edit. What’s that? I was hoping you would ask. 

Clutter is an accumulation of stuff. It represents postponed decisions, objects without homes, misplaced items, or things that have overstayed their welcome. Editing happens first, which clears the clutter so that getting organized can begin. The beauty of the mindful edit is that it can be done in tiny time blocks- five, ten, or twenty minutes. Using small blocks of time to ask quality questions, edit, and declutter makes the process doable and less overwhelming.

“The beauty of the mindful edit is that it can be done in tiny time blocks.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Especially when you are overwhelmed, instead of creating a big plan, making you feel more overwhelmed, think small. It’s OK to allow the editing process to be more organic rather than defining every step. Begin in a tiny area like a kitchen drawer, a closet rack, or a single paper pile. The goal is to edit a little section and then move on to the next.

Ask mindful editing questions:

• Does this item belong in this room?

• Can I reroute it to another location?

• Do I need this?

• Do I like it?

• Is it still useful?

• Can I donate, trash, or recycle it? 

• Does it need to occupy primary real estate?

• Has it expired?

• Do I have to be the keeper of this paper, information, or can I easily find it on the Internet?

• Is it enhancing or detracting from my life, space, or area?

• Is it adding to overwhelm and clutter?

• Can I release it now?

• Is it time to part ways and let it go?

You might have other questions that you love to ask. The better your questions are, the more successful the edit, and the less clutter you will have.

There is tremendous power in the mindful edit and the positive feelings you will experience when you let go. What are your favorite editing questions for reducing clutter? Do you have a recent editing experience you want to share? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

A few weeks ago, I wrote about some of the positive mindset changes my clients experience during their virtual organizing sessions. A common theme is going from overwhelmed to unstuck.

Whether clients are overwhelmed or not, all grapple with “What’s my next step?”  This is the intriguing part. How do we figure out what to do next during a virtual organizing session? What do some typical next steps look like?

If you are curious, continue reading. I will share my latest discoveries with you.

How to Figure Out Next

It’s probably no surprise, but figuring out next begins with asking thought-provoking questions and listening carefully. We check in first before we start organizing. With curiosity as our guide, we discuss how things went in between sessions, discover successes and challenges, and find out what’s happening now. Is a current circumstance affecting their energy, mood, or preferences? All of these discoveries go into finding next. 

Once we’ve talked, I can tell if my client is clear about their next step or need help discovering it. If they are unsure, we clarify and discuss several options. It’s always their choice, which is one of the powerful aspects of virtual organizing work. When clients choose what they want to focus on, they own the process and are invested in the outcome. 

What Next Looks Like

Each client has unique organizing goals and needs. Their projects differ in scope and focus. Clients want a range of help from me, including brainstorming, planning, body doubling, focusing, system designing, resource-providing, list-making, and more. While working, we focus on decision-making skills, letting go, mindfulness, awareness, and moving forward one small step at a time. The organizing work happens in their offices (at home and work,) bedrooms, closets, kitchens, pantries, laundry rooms, bathrooms, dining rooms, living rooms, garages and other areas.

“Taking that next step builds momentum.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

During each virtual organizing session, they experience change and progress. Taking that next step builds momentum. Below is a small sample of clients’ next steps and successes they experienced during their one-hour virtual organizing sessions:

• Created a goals list of organizing tasks and projects for every room in the house

• Edited and cleared papers from the office floor

• Brainstormed ideas for the most effective use of the space

• Edited expired make-up and personal care products

• Edited and decluttered items on the bed

• Sorted and organized backlog of mail

• Created a filing system

• Drafted a project to-do list

• Edited and decluttered the pantry

• Cleared out old files 

• Edited and organized a box of papers

• Created a to-do list

• Edited and organized memorabilia

• Organized books

• Edited a stack of magazines

• Edited and organized clothing closet

• Organized mind clutter

You may wonder why I shared this list. It’s simple. Next begins somewhere. While your goal may be huge, big can be overwhelming. But with focus, small blocks of time, and some guidance, you will get there, one paper, box, or decision at a time.

Where did your next step bring you? Did it create the momentum to continue organizing? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Have you ever felt stuck moving forward? Maybe you felt challenged with decision-making, figuring out the next step on a project, or making a significant life change. Over the last few months, we’ve talked about the influence and motivation boost that a fresh start brings and how to embrace change through thinking and actions. Many of you have done fantastic work around those concepts. But now what? You have ideas, energy, and motivation, but next feels elusive. It’s as if a fog has washed over you, and you’re waiting for it to lift.

Getting unstuck and finding next is a regular part of the work I do with my virtual organizing clients. It’s also something I experienced recently. Without going into the specifics about a new project I’m starting, I felt stuck with figuring out my next step. I will let you know more about the project at another time. (It’s not ready for prime time just yet.) For now, I will share three strategies, which helped me move forward, and can help you too.

Three Strategies to Get You Unstuck and Clear About Your Next Step

1. Capture the Ponderings

Our mind is the vessel that holds all of our ideas. Isn’t it incredible how it expands to house an infinite amount of thoughts? However, while our mind is vast, it is useful to download ideas to another container. We often call this a “brain dump.” You can write in a journal, capture notes in an electronic document, or talk into a voice recorder. The idea is to transfer your project ideas from your mind to a specifically designated location or home. This helps you isolate and organize those thoughts from the other million swirling ideas in the vessel.

I found this tremendously helpful for my project. I thought a lot about it but overwhelmed myself with all of the possible ideas and directions to take things. I could almost visualize the bullet points in my head, but it was too much to organize. So what did I do? I opened up a Word doc, created headers with bullet points. Seven pages later, my download was complete. I captured the project ideas on paper, and my mind felt freer. But even on paper, it was still a lot to assimilate. Next wasn’t obvious yet. That’s when I paired this with the second strategy.

2. Talk With a Gifted Listener

We have different processing modalities. For verbal processors, like me, writing and talking aloud helps me make sense of the world. It’s not just talking but conversing with someone who is a great listener and reflector. I recognized how helpful it would be to discuss my project with someone who asks great questions, listens deeply, provides valuable feedback, and was objective. I reached out to Marcy Stoudt, the very generous and insightful Executive Coach and Founder of The Executive Mom Nest. She helped me distill things so that by the time we finished our conversation, I felt more focused and clear, less overwhelmed, more energized, and ready to embrace the next steps. I used one additional strategy that helped bring everything together.

“Walking helped me define my essential next step.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

3. Walk in Nature

Research exists on the benefits to our mental health and well-being for walking in nature. Think forests, water bodies, gardens, grassy knolls, and mountains. Walking is part of my daily routine. I walk to shift my energy, stretch my body, and clear my head. To help me figure out the next steps for the project, I was specific about this particular walk. I wrote my notes and talked with Marcy. Walking helped me define my essential next step. Just as walking loosens and frees-up movement in the body, it has a similar effect on the mind. While I walked, I thought about what I wrote along with Marcy’s insights. I breathed in the fresh air, appreciated the beautiful Hudson River, and allowed my thoughts to simmer. My hope was by walking, my actual next step would magically appear.

Incredibly, it did! By the time I returned home, I knew what my next step was. You might be surprised by my choice. I decided to take a few days off from thinking about or taking action on the project. I needed balance at that moment. The project had been consuming my thoughts and creating undue stress. I needed some distance to move forward with clarity- not years or months, but just a few days.

There are many ways to get unstuck and figure out the next step. These three strategies- capture, talk, and walk helped me. I hope all or some of them will help you when you’re feeling challenged by next. Have you felt stuck recently? Has finding next been difficult? What helps you move forward? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.